I went to a party a few weeks ago and saw some long-acquainted couples flirting/bantering with people who were not their partner.
Is it ever kosher or never under any circumstances?
Re: Flirting with someone who’s not your husband/wife…
Reminds of another old thread…
Most people in that thread said…“mind your own business”…“you need to change the people you hangout with”
DISCLAIMER: the above mentioned are not my opinions/words…
Re: Flirting with someone who’s not your husband/wife…
When does light-hearted comfortable conversation between people who aren’t married to one another become inappropriate flirting? At the event, the jokes being made were off-colour and made me blush :sid: Does that make me a prude or am I fair in saying there are some things married people shouldn’t say/do with someone who’s not their spouse?
Re: Flirting with someone who's not your husband/wife...
They might be just having a laugh?? and their 'humour' might seem crude to you?? may be??
Re: Flirting with someone who's not your husband/wife...
While the interactions were taking place....were both partners present? In that case...both partners can witness/hear what the other is saying. And if they didn't appear uncomfortable...then perhaps what you're perceiving is flirting is not so for them?
Re: Flirting with someone who’s not your husband/wife…
Haram 
Re: Flirting with someone who’s not your husband/wife…
Maybe I am a prude…
Okay, so what’s the line in the sand? What behaviour of a married person towards someone who is not their spouse is acceptable and what is unacceptable?
Re: Flirting with someone who's not your husband/wife...
If both genders are advised to lower their gaze.....then how can this injunction make any sort of flirting/banter (which goes beyond lowering your gaze) kosher?
Re: Flirting with someone who's not your husband/wife...
While the interactions were taking place....were both partners present? In that case...both partners can witness/hear what the other is saying. And if they didn't appear uncomfortable...then perhaps what you're perceiving is flirting is not so for them?
In this case their spouses were present, but what if the spouse isn't present? Is flirting/bantering okay/permissable if the spouse is there and is sanctioning the conduct?
If both genders are advised to lower their gaze.....then how can this injunction make any sort of flirting/banter (which goes beyond lowering your gaze) kosher?
That is the religious/moral answer, but the reality is that co-ed socializing is the norm - so how far does this co-ed socializing go - at what point is the conduct inappropriate?
Re: Flirting with someone who’s not your husband/wife…
Read my previous post. If both genders are advised to lower their gaze…then how can flirting/bantering be “kosher” if such interactions usually go beyond lowering the gaze, right? It would be considered less than kosher whether your spouse is present or not. But is it possible that the partners do not see each others’ behavior as flirting? Maybe to this particular couple…banter is different from flirting. Oooh…the would make a good topic for a thread…the difference between banter and flirting.
Re: Flirting with someone who’s not your husband/wife…
That would be a good thread topic 
Re: Flirting with someone who's not your husband/wife...
In this case their spouses were present, but what if the spouse isn't present? Is flirting/bantering okay/permissable if the spouse is there and is sanctioning the conduct?
That is the religious/moral answer, but the reality is that co-ed socializing is the norm - so how far does this co-ed socializing go - at what point is the conduct inappropriate?
one should not forget about Allah, Who is watching us.
religion is complete life, one should not separate it from society. a behavior of wise spouse should be loyal to his/her SO. :@:
Re: Flirting with someone who's not your husband/wife...
That is the religious/moral answer, but the reality is that co-ed socializing is the norm - so how far does this co-ed socializing go - at what point is the conduct inappropriate?
That's hard to answer, Sehrysh. It will vary for each person. For some...the line is drawn at compliments. For others...the line is drawn once the compliments go past a certain number. Then there are those who think it's all good...untill there's physical contact of ANY kind. For others it could depend upon frequency and length of the interaction. This, too, could make for an interesting thread.....where do you (as an individual) draw the line?
Re: Flirting with someone who’s not your husband/wife…
i would agree with the advice given previously
Re: Flirting with someone who’s not your husband/wife…
So you want Islamic prospective OR… ? 
Re: Flirting with someone who's not your husband/wife...
I went to a party a few weeks ago and saw some long-acquainted couples flirting/bantering with people who were not their partner.
Is it ever kosher or never under any circumstances?
One my youngest khala who is in her mid thirties..her friends who were less or around same age..were flirting with your highness. I joked about having cup of coffee with them and one of them found me very interesting pal. I was later on told by my khala. So ya it is all kosher under any circumstance..especially if you're single fellow or girl.
Re: Flirting with someone who's not your husband/wife...
We all know flirting in any form or shape , with married or single people is not kosher.
So now the questions are:
Do you need a judgement or fatwa against those who indulge in it ?
What purpose will it serve ?
Do you want to stop them from doing what they are doing ?
Do you have the courage to go and set them straight ?
Do you need strategies to stop from any kind of flirting happening in a party you throw ?
If yes make sure the the men and women are segregated in your parties.
Re: Flirting with someone who’s not your husband/wife…
Sehrysh, this may sound strange but I think I am completely oblivious. In fact, I know I am 
Is it normal? I don’t know. Is it just playful banter? I guess. I am not married even when I was, I never was in such a situation.
IF I notice something of the sort, I don’t get alarmed at all. I simply look the other way. It might be wrong or might not be wrong. I don’t know their intentions, the context of the conversation, their relationship, etc. I might be judging prematurely. And even if I am right, what can I do about it? Nothing.
To sochnay ka kya faida?
Re: Flirting with someone who's not your husband/wife...
Maybe a better way to ask or frame the question is: When does harmless banter become flirtation? (which as Red suggested merits it's own thread).
Re: Flirting with someone who's not your husband/wife...
Maybe a better way to ask or frame the question is: When does harmless banter become flirtation? (which as Red suggested merits it's own thread).
bantering with non-mehram is also not allowed.