Flirting: Party Etiquette

[Mr_Fraudia]

Re: Flirting: Party Etiquette

@PyariCgudia

Okay, I admit this is a bit inspired by some personal issues.

What is your typical reaction when you are at some event, or dawat, or gathering of sorts when you see someone of the opposite sex staring back at you?

Do you flirt?

Do you lower your eyes?

Do you play a wait and see game - i.e. look away, then casually look back to see if they still look, then look away, then look back, and repeat the process until someone breaks into a smile?

Or other technique?

:halo:

well I suppose the first decision point is one of the most critical, are you even looking for something.

what is this something,..looking to get married, serious relationship, dating, freindship, a one nighter (hey..just listing an inventory, not saying anyone her eis looking for one or the other or whether its okay or not okay)

then the critical question is, are you interested in the person staring at you.

then your approach may depend on where you are, college mixer, shaadi, mela, movie..

then we go back to point #1 and what this “something” that you are looking for is going to impact your approach.

I am in my mid 30’s and married but the part below is based on my experiences as a single guy in my late teens to late 20’s

I must say that I am surprised because reading this thread you woudl think that desi women would never go and strike up a conversation with someone they find interesting. Aside from a handful of cases, most desi women have made the first move and I have just responded whatever has been the intent of the interaction.

Timeframe is also important, will you be seeingf this person often, its a diff challenge if the person is at your school and u see her often, versus seeing someone at a shaadi where you are at all events, or meeting someone at just one event.

and please move sooner than later, if ther eis someone t a shaadi that u find interesting, initiate contact first day and build upon it on each successive day rather than, try to execute whatever approach u have in mind at the 11th hour on the last day.

here are some general rules of thumb that have alway worked for me..solo missions are always best.. no wingmen, people think that if she is with pals or you are with pals when u talk it will make it less awkward.. it will not..the more people that are involved initially the more complicated it is..

1- making yourself approachable..i.e. not surrounded by people at all times

#2- dont crowd out the person, no reason to follow anyone or be too close to them, alone or in a group, maintain enough of a distance that you dont make the other person uncomfortable

#3- make the contact or her ability to initiate contact as effortless as possible and decrease awkwardness out. Go get a drink when she is getting a drink and make some small talk, see what the chemistry is and adjust accordingly.