First Wife's Permission

Society Religion & Philosophy
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Re: First Wife’s Permission

geekk, that could be the case. However, having the assurance that she would have the right to give him a divorce (hope I’m saying it correctly) would do for most of us.

This is a broad area that has to be studied in depth.

Anyway, here’s a copy that I could find. It doesn’t look too satisfactory to me for some reason, or looks too simple I guess. #18 talks about giving the wife the right to divorce.

http://www.embassyofpakistan.org/forms/Transnakha.doc

I would want to see what a non-Pakistani nikkah form looks like. I’m sure it’ll be slightly different for sure.

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Re: First Wife’s Permission

I’m dead sure there’s a hadith on it.

Found’em:

Source: Sahih Bukhari

Volume 5, Book 58, Number 164:

Narrated

'Aisha: I did not feel jealous of any of the wives of the Prophet as much as I did of Khadija (although) she died before he married me, for I often heard him mentioning her, and Allah had told him to give her the good tidings that she would have a palace of Qasab (i.e. pipes of precious stones and pearls in Paradise), and whenever he slaughtered a sheep, he would send her women-friends a good share of it.

Volume 5, Book 58, Number 165:

Narrated 'Aisha:

I did not feel jealous of any woman as much as I did of Khadija because Allah’s Apostle used to mention her very often. He married me after three years of her death, and his Lord (or Gabriel) ordered him to give her the good news of having a palace of Qasab in Paradise.

Volume 5, Book 58, Number 166:

Narrated 'Aisha:

I did not feel jealous of any of the wives of the Prophet as much as I did of Khadija though I did not see her, but the Prophet used to mention her very often, and when ever he slaughtered a sheep, he would cut its parts and send them to the women friends of Khadija. When I sometimes said to him, “(You treat Khadija in such a way) as if there is no woman on earth except Khadija,” he would say, “Khadija was such-and-such, and from her I had children.”

Volume 7, Book 62, Number 156:

Narrated 'Aisha:

I never felt so jealous of any wife of Allah’s Apostle as I did of Khadija because Allah’s Apostle used to remember and praise her too often and because it was revealed to Allah’s Apostle that he should give her (Khadija) the glad tidings of her having a palace of Qasab in Paradise .

And there are plenty more on it.

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Re: First Wife's Permission

^ Yeah well, its natural. Its very hard for any lady to share her husband. You can imagine if it was trying for Aisha, then how trying it is for other ladies.

Right Geekk - sorry about my wording there - that's what I meant. That a female is not allowed to stop her husband from re-marrying, but she is allowed to have a choice as to whether she wishes to be part of a polygamous relationship or not.

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Re: First Wife’s Permission

Dono if you have read it thorougly



18. Has the bridegroom given the right of Divorce to the Bride.
If given on what conditions:
 
19. Is there any restriction on the right of Divorce on the 
Bridegroom:
 
20. Is there any document prepared of living her life, etc. 
If prepared, provide a brief description:
 
**21. Is the Bridegroom has a wife already? If so, has he**
**obtained the permission to have 2nd wife according **
**to the rule No. 8, 10 of the Muslim family ordinance **
**of 1961. **

**22. No and date of the correspondence according to **
**which the council has permitted the 2nd marriage.**

I am not much sure that if Pakistan is an islamic country or not but, this nikah form from it embassy looks quite comprehesive to me. It cover all aspect and provides protection to ladies right in totality :k:

Yes most of the girls do not read the nikah form… in excitement.

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Re: First Wife's Permission

^ Its not shown to them from the marriages I've seen happen. They are read the nikkahnama (certain portions of it), and they sign on the wedding day.

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Re: First Wife's Permission

PCG, these are matters of fiqh where people can have a difference of opinion. IMO, a man can marry another women without the permission of the first wife but the first wife has the right to divorce if she doesn't like the idea. Mainly because the right to marry more than one has condition in Quran that does not include any such permission and also because usually such marriages if done for the right reasons are marriages of sacrifice not marriages based on hormones.

In a country like Pakistan where women are forced to marry others, do you really think they aren't forced to give permission to marry another?

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Re: First Wife's Permission

Code_Red, hence the reason I stated I wonder what non-Pakistani nikkah form looks like. I don't think it is an obligation to have your first wife's permission in order to go for the 2nd one.

Please Welcome your new Temp mod
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Re: First Wife’s Permission

Pakistan’s form is probably broadly similar to any Muslim country that uses Hanafi law as the basis for marriages, ie Indonesia, Malaysia.

Moroccan and Egyptian forms will probably be different in this regard.

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Re: First Wife's Permission

PCG, maybe in your sheltered upbringing you were never taught about these things, however, most msulims that I know are/were well aware of this fact that permission from first wife is required.

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Re: First Wife’s Permission

Hanafi law as the basis for marriages

From this website: http://www.expertlaw.com/library/family_law/islamic_custody-2.html

“The Hanafi school generally does not allow additional clauses to the marriage contract.[47] However, many Hanifi jurists today recognize that certain conditions may be added. While such Hanifis accept conditions that give the wife the right to divorce the husband at will, they consider a condition prohibiting the husband from taking another wife void”

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Re: First Wife's Permission

Kaleem, you yourself are seeing the comments in this thread. Some people here are saying you can marry a second without the first's permission.

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Re: First Wife’s Permission

Yeh ! like they are forced to sign on gunpoint or something :stuck_out_tongue:

Bibi, nikah form is availble in market just for Rs 5 or one can download it FOC and read/examine it everyday ..Every option is available you can point out to your parents about what type of conditions you want to mention in that agreement (nikah).

It is not feasable/appropriate to discuss the detail at the time of ceremony when the girl has so many things on her mind like crying, huging and at the same time not ruining the make-up… so to look good in movie.

In Pakistan most of the time girls dont have to worry about these thing because their parents look after these matters very well. The family bonds are pretty strong so the husband will have to think for about thousand time before doing any hanky panky.
*ek ko sambhalna mushkil hai bechara dosri shaadi ka kahan sochey ga * :frowning:

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body waxing
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Re: First Wife's Permission

Code, bhai akhlakan parents should still ask the larki kay beti tum bhee zara yeh nikkahnama parh lo.

I've watched many wedding videos and I see some uncle coming up to the bride telling her haq-mahr and she signs the contract and that's it. Shadi Mubarak.

Btw codey, you married?

got juthA?
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Re: First Wife's Permission

PCG what would you do if:
a: Your husband asked permission for #2
b: You were the second one

Hey it can happen!!! oooo la la

Actually what about the second wife; the second wife doesnt need permission nor does she have to know about the first, so how about that bombshell on the second lolita?

got juthA?
got juthA?
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Re: First Wife's Permission

In Pakistan most of the time girls dont have to worry about these thing because their parents look after these matters very well. The family bonds are pretty strong so the husband will have to think for about thousand time before doing any hanky panky.

Families obviously don't look at it very well, because most Pakistani girls don't know of these options.

I am new here.
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Re: First Wife's Permission

**PCG what would you do if:
a: Your husband asked permission for #2
b: You were the second one

Hey it can happen!!! oooo la la**

Well.

a. I would say no, and it would be on my nikkahnama. If he insisted, and if he felt that he wasn't interested in me anymore, than he is free to go. I'll just get a divorce and also alimony. :D

b. Well, I already dealt with that situation on this website (although I wasn't married to the person). The situation on this website was not with someone I've met face to face, otherwise, I'm sure my reaction would be a great deal more heated and cruel.

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Re: First Wife's Permission

Why only the wife..what about kids? they should be asked too, beta aik aur mummy chahiye? aur husband's mother...she is probably already upto her neck with the first one,,,now you have 2nd bahu to deal with.
in my experience usually 2nd wives are much younger than the husband..in few years husband's charm for 2 women wears out and this youner wife causes lot more probpems in the mohalla than most kids here can imagine...so in some cases, whole mohallas should be asked for approval.;)

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Re: First Wife's Permission

^ excellent point. Children should definitely be consulted with as this can really affect their development.

nain....
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Re: First Wife's Permission

Ok boys and girls. Lets put an end to this discussion, there is not a woman in this society (US) who would allow her husband to bring in a second wife...ok correction it does not apply to folks in Utah.

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Re: First Wife's Permission

^ then why does the Quran talk about it?

Some girls would actually. They do it in the form of polyamorous marriages.