When we argue, he is the one that is calm and gets his point across in a "mature" manner, i on the other hand apparently use catty, sarcastic remarks to make my point, i usually end up in tears, and tell him how much i hate my life with him and how we should end it as i dont want to live like this anymore. Honest!!! but somehow he manages to make me see how i started it (more sarcasm thrown his way) and then we just apologise to each other and finish.........whilst i continue to mumble under my breath..........
I am really happy at some of these responses, i mean, i know that I/we are normal WHEW
He never apologizes. I always do (when there is an apology necessary).
Fights usually start cz after a long day I want to see him and talk to him but he just wants me to not bother him.......
i can so identify , we fight usually coz of an issue i have , he is pretty good and does try to avoid fites,
at time if there is an apology needed i apologise , at times he does. but i think i do it more when there are times he really needs to aplogise.
anyways we get thru it .. things do get better as the years go on i guess.
When we argue, he is the one that is calm and gets his point across in a "mature" manner, i on the other hand apparently use catty, sarcastic remarks to make my point, i usually end up in tears, and tell him how much i hate my life with him and how we should end it as i dont want to live like this anymore. Honest!!! but somehow he manages to make me see how i started it (more sarcasm thrown his way) and then we just apologise to each other and finish.........whilst i continue to mumble under my breath..........
hahahhaha thats sounds so much like me !!!!!!!!!
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How do you cope with the fight?
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It depends. If she's complaining about nothing (i.e. a non-issue), I ignore her rants. If she's complaining about something legitimate, try to resolve it.
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Who starts it? who ends? does one apologize?
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She tends to start arguments more often. I usually try to ignore, but every now and then I'll also go on the offensive. Then we would both try to end it and we'd both end up apologizing to each other.
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And, aybe this is harder, but what exactly is a "normal" fight that happens with every couple vs a "major" fight?
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I'd say every argument we had so far would be minor. Nothing major yet, or ever, inshAllah.
Re: Fighting between couples
with us a major fight happens when a specific issue becomes a bone of contention, can’t seem to resolve it, it keeps coming up again and again and again till it self-detonates 
a normal fight is when ur able to resolve it in the end, i guess
Re: Fighting between couples
My husband and I very rarely fight, I think I can count on one hand the fights that we've had since marriage over 10 years ago. I learned well from my husband. He says that in order to get your point across, you need to do it completely without emotion. And he's right. So if I'm really upset over something, I learned to ignore it for a while. Think about it but remove the emotional aspect of it. And then discuss it but again without emotional tirades, insults or sarcasm. This is very hard to do and I sometimes inject a nasty remark or 2 but always when I resort to that, all it does is continue the argument and make it worse. So I try to remain clinical and unemotional. When I do, things get settled much more quickly.
Re: Fighting between couples
^ that's really good advice.
My husband is kind of sensitive so I try REALLY hard not to say anything hurtful when he does something/says something I don't like. I don't say anything in the 'heat of the moment' and try to change the topic but it's really hard to hide that I'm upset. I talk to him a day or two later (we are in a long distance relationship) when I am more calm. Sometimes he complains about how I hold things in but in my defence, I'd rather say it when I am speaking rationally :-)
Re: Fighting between couples
what? a couple and rarely fight? Isn’t that impossible?
^ not really... fight to tuaba tuaba, koi khaas agruements bhi nahi... its because he Never listened to me.. and i stopped listening to him either. we just do things on our own way
:k: 
Re: Fighting between couples
^ ye but that's after how many years of marriage? :(
Re: Fighting between couples
my hubs and I are good friends, we were friends before anything else. So we share many of the same views, likes, dislikes, outlooks on parenting and life in general. And really, whats there to fight about? Not very much in the overall scheme of things.
my hubs and I are good friends, we were friends before anything else. So we share many of the same views, likes, dislikes, outlooks on parenting and life in general. And really, whats there to fight about? Not very much in the overall scheme of things.
And this is where I think the problems begin . wait that sounds wrong. Is it not a safe assumption that if you know someone for many years (and also have a relaxed personality as opposed to be extremely rigid or strict), fights and arguments are less likely? Hmmmmm
Re: Fighting between couples
sara, why would that cause problems?
my hubs and I are good friends, we were friends before anything else. So we share many of the same views, likes, dislikes, outlooks on parenting and life in general. And really, whats there to fight about? Not very much in the overall scheme of things.
I agree that if you are on same page about life then there isn't much to fight about. Besides I think most of the fights are caused by third person involvment and if you decide early on that your relationship is far more important than any other then there will be no fights.
sara, why would that cause problems?
Sorry i meant the opposite, when u dont know each toher or have totally different otulooks on life.
When they become possessive, it annoys me! It's alright to some extent and then it gets annoying. I used to clarify at first, I ignore it now. ;)
Re: Fighting between couples
If i will say something here. Sara516 will remove it. lol :D
Re: Fighting between couples
Crying out for attention are we? :D