feeling sad :(

Lifestyle Relationships
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so it was r third anniversary every1 wished me n huby except from my inlaws i m feeling so sad y they dont wish me :frowning: n it always happen 3 months bck it was my bday they didnt wished me huby reminded my mum in law n she was like acha meri tarf se kr dena wish woh khud kyun nhi kr sakti from last three years ihave been wishing them on their bdays anniversaries mother days father day i send them gifts also but they never it hurts me when u do so much for others n in return she get thenga :frowning: i asked huby n he was like its ok jis ne kr dya thek hai jis ne na kya uss ki marzi tum kyun upset hoti hai but i didnt liked it all
so i was thinking should i call my MIL n tell her tht yesterday was r anniversary or should i simply ignore it (its difficult) bc she does this only 2 me not 2 her other bahus
n last month she was feeling sorry bc she hurted me always n now again she is doing this? why she said sorry if she didnt mean it :frowning:

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Re: feeling sad :(

Happy belated anniversary Angel. :) may you have many more joyous years with the husband . ameen

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Re: feeling sad :(

Let it go, I would say. You do your part perfectly, your husband sees the difference between your treatment of his family and their treatment of you... phir tenu ki farak painda eh? Hubby see's it - that's all that matters.

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Re: feeling sad :(

thnkx demesne :)

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Re: feeling sad :(

when you give somebody something or greet another person on their birthday or anniversary don't expect anything in return, it's a rule of thumb that's best to follow, expect nothing and be pleasantly surprised when they actually do give you something or greet you. you can't change anybody especially the elders, you need to adjust to get along with them just to keep the peace.

but from my side even if i don't know you, happy anniversary and hope you have many more pleasant anniversaries to come

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Re: feeling sad :(

yeah tu thek hai but fark parta hai y me not other bahu meray sath he asa kyun she should treat all bahus equally n i know the reason bc her elder son is v strict she knows if she did anything her son will fight wth her n youger is so ladla n me n huby middle one always ignore bc she knew my huby will never say anything 2 her n i also dont want my huby 2 do anytging but yeah it hurts me

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Re: feeling sad :(

[quote="Nisha25, post:64, topic:251706"]

when you give somebody something or greet another person on their birthday or anniversary don't expect anything in return, it's a rule of thumb that's best to follow, expect nothing and be pleasantly surprised when they actually do give you something or greet you. you can't change anybody especially the elders, you need to adjust to get along with them just to keep the peace./QUOTE

i m not expecting but when i treat her nice she should also like she do wth other bahus y she just dont treat equally :(

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Re: feeling sad :(


The more you give, the more they'll pull. If you really feel like she doesn't treat you equally for some reason, fine. Bring up the anniversary stuff politely and say you guys missed her or something when you celebrated. She'll automatically feel something and wish you or apologize or give an explanation... anything.

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Re: feeling sad :(

**Happy Birthday to you! :)

btw, was yours a love marriage without ur MIL's approval? lemme talk to her...i'm a good counselor. :D **

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Re: feeling sad :(

it was r anniversary KKF not bday anyway thnkx it was totally arrange when she first came she was so impressed by me :) (i m not praising myself but this was the scene) tht she said 2 my mum tht i like ur daughter so much tht i want her my daughter in law in any case i have 3 sons u can choose urself n v were bit surprize but now i think if she is like this if i has love marriage OMG

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Re: feeling sad :(

I think that considering the divorce rate these days....it's an accomplishment for a couple to make it from one anniversary to the next. That said, Devilish Angel, .....it's YOUR and YOUR husband's efforts in making the marriage work and bringing it this far. What I'm trying to say is that your anniversary is about you and your husband.....and that is it. It's not about your in-laws or any other party.......but for some reason you have made your anniversary all about your in-laws. Why? If your in-laws don't wish you.......is it going to make your anniversary "kam" in any way? With this type of attitude.....you're only ruining the joy of celebrating this special day with your husband. You're giving your in-laws all this power over a special day that they really don't have any contribution in. Think about that.

As for your birthday....the people who have the greatest connection with your birthday (more than your in-laws) are your parents as they brough you into this world....and they wished you, and that matters more, in my opinion. I'd rather receive birthday wishes from people who I know sincerely care about me (such as friends, family, etc).........rather than people who don't like me very much.

You're just wasting precious moments of these special occasions on your in-laws. You have a wonderful marriage with your husband, family and friends who love you..........but you're stuck on two people....just two people who don't care about you. Life is short to begin with.....and you're making it even shorter by worrying about them.

No, you should NOT call to remind them that it was your anniversary. That would be a stupid and needy and desperate thing to do. I just predict that it will secretly make them happy that they suceeded in upsetting you. Don't discuss the matter and if you do talk to them or see them......show them that you're happy...that you don't need their approval or acknowledgment. You have enough people in your life that like you and they make up for those that don't. You're a big girl and you need to be stronger, DA.

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Re: feeling sad :(


**oops. i'm sorry...Happy anniversary.

well, you can't make everyone happy at all times...so, take it as it is...play cool...ignore her as she ignores you...if she changes her ways, you change too...wage a lil 'cold war' :)**

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Re: feeling sad :(

Someone freaking translate please.

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Re: feeling sad :(

Why do ppl make such a big deal about others remembering tehir anniversaries? As if the world revolves around you.

Its really not a big deal, as long as you and your hubby are good with each other!

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Re: feeling sad :(

[QUOTE]

so it was r third anniversary every1 wished me n huby except from my inlaws i m feeling so sad y they dont wish me :( n it always happen 3 months bck it was my bday they didnt wished me huby reminded my mum in law n she was like acha meri tarf se kr dena wish woh khud kyun nhi kr sakti from last three years ihave been wishing them on their bdays anniversaries mother days father day i send them gifts also but they never it hurts me when u do so much for others n in return she get thenga :( i asked huby n he was like its ok jis ne kr dya thek hai jis ne na kya uss ki marzi tum kyun upset hoti hai but i didnt liked it all
so i was thinking should i call my MIL n tell her tht yesterday was r anniversary or should i simply ignore it (its difficult) bc she does this only 2 me not 2 her other bahus

n last month she was feeling sorry bc she hurted me always n now again she is doing this? why she said sorry if she didnt mean it

[/QUOTE]

It was our third anniversary, everyone wished me and my husband except for my in laws. I feel so sad that why they don't wish me. It always happens. 3 months ago it was my birthday and htey didnt' wish me. Hubby reminded my MIL and she was like "tell her I said happy birthday." Why couldn't she do it herself? For hte last 3 years I've been wishign them on their birthdays, anniversaries, mothers day fathers day, and I send them gifts but they never do. It hurts me when you do so much for others and in return (she get thenga...I dont know what that means).
I asked hubby and he was like its okay, whoever did did and who ever didn't, thats their marzi...why are you upset.
But I didn't like it at all.
So I was thinking should I call my MIL and tell her that yesterday was our anniversary or should I simply ignore it (its difficult) because she does this only to me and not to her other bahus.
and last month she was feeling sorry bc she hurt me always and now she's doing this again? Why did she say sorry if she didn't mean it?

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Re: feeling sad :(

Someone please shoot me. I wasted time reading this thread.

And thanks for the translation.

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Re: feeling sad :(

omg ! .. she didnt greet you perosnlally .. its time for war .. ATTACK !

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Re: feeling sad :(

I think the point is that MIL wishes all her other bahus their anniversaries and birthdays, but totally ignores her special occasions. Is that right DV?

If thats the case, I think thats pretty mean of her MIL. But OP don't think too much about it....you shouldn't be feeling sad as long as you and your husband are happy and happily celebrating the anniversaries.

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Re: feeling sad :(

^You have Soni's blessing.

Why don't you do what a stereotypical bahu would do? Just show off the anniversary gifts your husband got you to your MIL...brag about the whole outing....gush about how loving and generous he is....and watch saasoo maa seethe with jealousy over the attention you get from her son.

Or you can have the last laugh by not wishing her on her funeral. Okay, that was harsh...just stick to the first strategy or completely ignore her and live your life happily.

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Re: feeling sad :frowning:

^ :rotfl:.:rotfl:.:rotfl:
Thanks you made me laugh today :rotfl: