feeling sad :(

[KKF]

Re: feeling sad :(

Why don't you do what a stereotypical bahu would do? Just show off the anniversary gifts your husband got you to your MIL...brag about the whole outing....gush about how loving and generous he is....and watch saasoo maa seethe with jealousy over the attention you get from her son.

hehehe...but, this can easily backfired, especially if he is mama's boy! she may get on his son's nerve to take 'action' against his wife! :D

[redvelvet]

Re: feeling sad :(

^You might have a point, KKF.

Alright DE....change in strategy here. Even though your MIL fails to wish you on your special days...........you should ALWAYS wish her on her birthdays and anniversary. On her next birthday.....wish her a happy birthday and gift her some wrinkle cream. (Get an expensive and prettily perfumed and packaged one, so your husband doesn't suspect you). And then tell her that she doesnt look a day over 75. When she angrily snorts a correction that she is 60....tell her "Haan....wahi to...mera matlab you look exactly your age....60....and not a day younger." Before she can yell at you......lunge forward and clasp your MIL's hands in your owns....and tearfully tell her how you wish that she will have many more birthdays.....so that you can always be there to lovingly wish her.

Then on her anniversary....congratulat her. And in your MIL's presence...look over at your FIL and congratulate him even more heartily...and sweetly but condescendingly say "You've made it THIS far, Sussar Ji. You are such a postive example in patience and strength and for all men and husbands."

[CEO1]

Re: feeling sad :(

^
You are so cheesy! I'm kind of cringing at the moment.

[KKF]

Re: feeling sad

@redvelvet

^You might have a point, KKF.

Alright DE…change in strategy here. Even though your MIL fails to wish you on your special days…you should ALWAYS wish her on her birthdays and anniversary. On her next birthday…wish her a happy birthday and gift her some wrinkle cream. (Get an expensive and prettily perfumed and packaged one, so your husband doesn’t suspect you). And then tell her that she doesnt look a day over 75. When she angrily snorts a correction that she is 60…tell her “Haan…wahi to…mera matlab you look exactly your age…60…and not a day younger.” Before she can yell at you…lunge forward and clasp your MIL’s hands in your owns…and tearfully tell her how you wish that she will have many more birthdays…so that you can always be there to lovingly wish her.

Then on her anniversary…congratulat her. And in your MIL’s presence…look over at your FIL and congratulate him even more heartily…and sweetly but condescendingly say “You’ve made it THIS far, Sussar Ji. You are such a postive example in patience and strength and for all men and husbands.”

thank you!..merii maaneN to saasuu maaN kii “supaarii” nikalvaa deN…ek hii jhaTke meN rasta saaf! hehe :D**na rahegaa baaNs, na bajegii baaNsurii **

[redvelvet]

Re: feeling sad :(

^ You are so cheesy! I'm kind of cringing at the moment.

It was deliberately meant to be cheesey. How astute you are.

[CEO1]

Re: feeling sad :(

@redvelvet

It was deliberately meant to be cheesey. How astute you are.

I know but I just had to point it out...pfft.

[Southie]

Re: feeling sad :(

The hurt you feel is natural. What you do about it is in your control. Let me go to the well one more time and cut and paste RV's post highlights

" just predict that it will secretly make them happy that they suceeded in upsetting you."

Do not bring this up with your MIL - it will only make her feel she has more power over you. Do not worry abt things you have no control over - your MIL's actions. Continue to be nice to her, dont let her see you sweat, and above all, be nice to your husband -

[redvelvet]

Re: feeling sad :(

I know but I just had to point it out...pfft.

If you had to point it out...then that means you were shocked...if you were shocked...then that means you didn't fully grasp that it was meant to be a ridiculous cheesy post (at least not right away). It would also mean that my calling you "astute" was sarcasm. Oh and pfft.

[CEO1]

Re: feeling sad

@redvelvet

If you had to point it out…then that means you were shocked…if you were shocked…then that means you didn’t fully grasp that it was meant to be a ridiculous cheesy post (at least not right away). It would also mean that my calling you “astute” was sarcasm. Oh and pfft.

Maybe you’re reading into it a bit too much…just maybe?

[NomiCA]

Re: feeling sad :(

the word astute always makes me laugh...

[redvelvet]

Re: feeling sad :(

the word astute always makes me laugh...

That's because you're not astute, Nomi.

[NomiCA]

Re: feeling sad

@redvelvet

That’s because you’re not astute, Nomi.

yea…but i think i am alright with it…i would’nt wants attention from pathans n black men :no:

[redvelvet]

Re: feeling sad

@NomiCA

yea…but i think i am alright with it…i would wants attention from pathans n black men :no:

You sure you’re alright with that? I think that’s very disturbing. :no:

[NomiCA]

Re: feeling sad

@redvelvet

You sure you’re alright with that? I think that’s very disturbing. :no:

damn!!! i need to sleep i think

[STA]

Re: feeling sad

@devilish_angel

so it was r third anniversary every1 wished me n huby except from my inlaws i m feeling so sad y they dont wish me n it always happen 3 months bck it was my bday they didnt wished me huby reminded my mum in law n she was like acha meri tarf se kr dena wish woh khud kyun nhi kr sakti from last three years ihave been wishing them on their bdays anniversaries mother days father day i send them gifts also but they never it hurts me when u do so much for others n in return she get thenga i asked huby n he was like its ok jis ne kr dya thek hai jis ne na kya uss ki marzi tum kyun upset hoti hai but i didnt liked it all
so i was thinking should i call my MIL n tell her tht yesterday was r anniversary or should i simply ignore it (its difficult) bc she does this only 2 me not 2 her other bahus
n last month she was feeling sorry bc she hurted me always n now again she is doing this? why she said sorry if she didnt mean it

happy wedding anniversary

[Reha]

Re: feeling sad :(

yeah tu thek hai but fark parta hai y me not other bahu meray sath he asa kyun she should treat all bahus equally n i know the reason bc her elder son is v strict she knows if she did anything her son will fight wth her n youger is so ladla n me n huby middle one always ignore bc she knew my huby will never say anything 2 her n i also dont want my huby 2 do anytging but yeah it hurts me

DA...I know your sadness is because you do so much and all you want is to be remembered.

I don't remember my best friends' anniversaries...and we've been friends for over 15 years...you'd think I'd gotten the hang of it by now right? I don't remember their kids' birthdays...I have them programmed in my phone so I get reminders but I don't remember them otherwise.

When will you guys get it...your MIL is not your mother. She is not required to remember your birthday, your anniversary, your kids' birthdays or any dates for that matter. Do what you can to be good to her because she is the mother of your husband and she deserves respect. But why care if she doesn't remember?

And why are you comparing yourself with the other bahus? Do you live with them? Do you have to see this day and night?

I know its easier said than done but you need to have much more control over yourself...do not let these things upset you.

Did you enjoy your anniversary? Do you and hubby have a good marriage? Are you happy?

Then nothing else matters.

Btw, happy anniversary.

[devilish_angel]

Re: feeling sad :(

I think the point is that MIL wishes all her other bahus their anniversaries and birthdays, but totally ignores her special occasions. Is that right DV?

If thats the case, I think thats pretty mean of her MIL. But OP don't think too much about it....you shouldn't be feeling sad as long as you and your husband are happy and happily celebrating the anniversaries.

exactly its not like i m waiting 4 their wish but if she can wish other n be sweet n nice 2 other bahus y this cold attitude 2wards me

[mirage]

Re: feeling sad :(

it was r anniversary KKF not bday anyway thnkx it was totally arrange when she first came she was so impressed by me :) (i m not praising myself but this was the scene) tht she said 2 my mum tht i like ur daughter so much tht i want her my daughter in law in any case i have 3 sons u can choose urself n v were bit surprize but now i think if she is like this if i has love marriage OMG

lol. looks like the garhbarh started when your husband started to be impressed with you, too.