So we told fil that kids will go school in the uk. So the move is now more real.
I should be elated.I’m.not. fil was quiet they are sad
Upset.and for some reason that’s seeping into me.I also feel tremendous guilt and like maybe I.am.over reacting. Do we need to.leave the country.yes. am.I sure? I don’t know.
I’m confusing.myself. any other overseas national would leave pak yes? ESP with kids?
Anyone?
My husband also feeling same as me. How shall we pick ourselves up that we have made right call to.move back to uk.+ ( husband has no visa )
At the end of the day you ultimatley have to do whats best for you and your kids. Make sure you do reassure his parents and make the effort to come and see them as much as you can financially afford to from the uk. With regards to your hubbys visa you will need to stay patient get a job inshallah and sort his visa out his spouse visa. It may have been easier to have intially done that but obvs you werent to know that things will change. Its a big move he knws his parents better so let him deal with any issues etc its normal to feel guilt
In my situation inlaws were horrible to me and even when we moved i did have that initial guilty feeling and sadness that wer leaving them behind however it was the besr decision for us at the time.
Reassure them you will visit them a lot. Tell them you would like to have them in your lives-you'll communicate regularly on skype, whatsapp, snapchat. Offer to help them migrate to UK if they change their minds.
Does your husband have other siblings in Pakistan to take care of them?
You guys married there or in Pakistan? Whats making you move?
Nadz is (rightfully) worried about the general law and order situation of Pakistan. She lives in Peshawar and the current tragedy in Peshawar is forcing her to think seriously about moving back to UK.
Nadz, parents can join you guys later if need be. Right now, you guys are young enough to make the move, later on, you will be stuck. Your brother in law is there to take care of them as well and your sister in law lives in the same city. You are well educated, your family lives in the UK and can help out too. There are so many people who have no way out.
Remember you are doing this for your kids. You are not over reacting. Yes you will feel guilty, it's only natural but they are still able to look after themselves and have your BIL there and your husband will be there for quite a while till you get a visa sorted. I would say it will take at least a year after you move here so depends on when ur thinking of moving.
Try not to feel guilty as this may make you change your decision. Remember immigration laws change and it just gets harder than before to get a visa, so the sooner you do this the better.
Why didn't you get a visa for your husband when you got married? Then you wouldn't have worried where you were, you wouldn't have had any problems moving between the countries.
I'm sorry but i am so sick of Nadz123 and her drama. whatever happens, are you ever happy? For couple of months you have been complaining about living with them. now that you are moving you are complaning again.
if they move to UK you'll complain fight with husband and end up posting a new tread here. If you will ever visit them in Pakistan again you will complain and a new tread will appear. My best advice is that now you are moving you should reflect over who you are and what will ever make you happy.
I am suprised thay your FIL is sad. I mean they should be happy that they will finally have a drama-free life?
I'm sorry but i am so sick of Nadz123 and her drama. whatever happens, are you ever happy? For couple of months you have been complaining about living with them. now that you are moving you are complaning again.
if they move to UK you'll complain fight with husband and end up posting a new tread here. If you will ever visit them in Pakistan again you will complain and a new tread will appear. My best advice is that now you are moving you should reflect over who you are and what will ever make you happy.
I am suprised thay your FIL is sad. I mean they should be happy that they will finally have a drama-free life?
The whole point of this forum is for people to let off steam or get advice from people who do not know them and will not be partial or bias. If you have no advice to give then ignore the thread n stay away.
Nadz is nadz and this is the way she is. Yes sometimes she does not heed good advice that may be given to her, but she cannot help how she feels. She is just saying she is feeling guilty which to me is not a bad thing, If she didn't feel guilty then some would say she is being heartless. Can't win anyway!
Well nothing really. Maybe I'll discuss again in a few days. But so far its quiet but OK.
No discussion has.happened yet. Husband just said he wants.kids.schooling in the uk has dad said OK. But was quiet and nothing more was said. So who knows what they thinking.
^^^There are many many karor kids are in that war zone, if your time has come, and your name is on that bullet, will UK can save you from that? Have you heard of sandy hook?
^^^There are many many karor kids are in that war zone, if your time has come, and your name is on that bullet, will UK can save you from that? Have you heard of sandy hook?
but the chances of getting shot, robbed, bombed are far greater than in West
Sandy hook is in the US not UK. Anyways, those school shootings were the work of lone people not armed organizations who claim that " this was just the trailer" and unlike Sandyhook who everyone condemned have actually backers who say that that the Taliban were fair in seeking revenge.
Besides, it's not just schools, there are random firings and bomb blasts everywhere in Pakistan. These things are there in the West too but way more in Pakistan. Yes, you can get affected any where but statistically the chances are more in Pakistan, simple!
