I feel guilty when i am spending money. I always have this thought in my mind that i should save up. Not sure for what though. Maybe for the future perhaps to spend on my kids inshallah and hubby. But then again i keep thinking that why should i save up? After all i have worked hard for this money. I know this sounds so so selfish that im having these kind of thoughts but nevertheless, i am always budgeting!
I keep a track on whats going out and coming in. I havent got much saved up but i think its getting worse. There are people who spend what they earn. Im not like that. I have to keep atleast 70% of what i earn safe.
Alhumdullilah i dont need to worry about bills etc as hubby takes care of that side. For example, i want to get my hair coloured…(pathetic example) and i know it will cost about £60-£70 but then i think that i can do it myself for about £6 but not to the same effect.
Do you think this is right? Should i be able to spend it on myself? On little things i do. Does anyone else do this?
Re: Feeling guilty about spending and saving money!
the question i usually ask myself is: "why am i earning this money?" sure i save some of it for the house that i am going to buy, inshaAllah. Some for emergencies.. but really you work hard for the money you earn. Allah gives you the wealth to spend it on yourself and HIS way.
I have a very simple system (at least i think its simple):
60% of my pay (the whole month) goes into my savings
10% for my own gadget buying craze (if the cost is not covered in one month i just wait till i end up saving that much)
10% for my emergencies. such as some family member needs something etc...
10% for my shopping (if needed, cloths, food etc..)
10% goes to masjid donation
so yeah i kept it simple.. works pretty good so far.. i hope to continue this even after shaadi, but i will probably change the 10% for family emergency to 10% for wife lol and scrap my gadget buying budget as well...
we shall see.. nothing wrong with spending money on yourself as long as it is controllable habit :)
Wow...Ansoon...it does sound good. When you get married, priorities change. I mean before marriage, i used just save and save and Alhumdullilah i had managed quite well.
When i got married, i realised that within a short amount of time, all that was saved up slowly disappeared. I paid for the photography, bridal makeup etc, presents for hubby and lil things for others. I didnt want to ask my parents as they were personal things to me so i was inclined to pay myself. i dont feel guilty at all. I would have if my parents had to foot even the smallest of bill.
Yeah ur right. I can spend some money on myself - or treat myself as long as i know im not wasting it away as some ppl do.
But still, i keep thinking maybe i shouldnt have bought this or that!
Re: Feeling guilty about spending and saving money!
i know how you feel Sunset... there are things i want to get done, like u said dyeing your hair or even a cut.. or maybe get a new pair of shoes... and i feel super guitly about it (Even though hubby reckons i dont.. but i do :) )
Our thing is, we both work... all my money goes into savings or if we have saved a considerable amount, we can use a lil for holidays or buying things for our new house (which doesnt exist yet.. but will Inshallah in a few months)
We use hubby's money to do everything else. Groceries, bills, rent, birtthday presents.. everything is from his pay.. and if we're not doing too bad, than we'll use watever is left over to splash on ourselves.. thats the way we do it. If we start spending my money, it means we're doing bad.. and going into "negative" (thats our term for not saving)
also, hubby says... we work hard... we both work full-time and look after a lil nutter, so its completely A O K for us to look after ourselves once in awhile :D
p.s the "my" and "his" money is to only point out the pays... its "our" money at the end of the day but to just to see how things are going we say "my" and "his"
Re: Feeling guilty about spending and saving money!
i honestly think any man who has wives like u two are incredibly fortunate.
Question, was anyone here a crazy spendthrift before getting married and/or having children? did saving and not spending come automaticlaly or was it a difficult learning process?
Re: Feeling guilty about spending and saving money!
Sara, i never had savings prior to getting married. I used to spend like i was some queen.. honest. My mum was like "save ur money.. dont u want to get married!" and id be like... na im single and i can do watever... and now my mum says "uve changed so much" cus i budget everything... lol hahaha
Honestly, u should have seen how much id spend...
and yes, it was difficult. At least for me... Before i didnt have a reason to save.. but after i got married, it took my awhile to realise we have to work together to achieve something.. I had to prioritise everything, or learn (and i have to thank hubby for all that.. he used to grill me hehe). But now, i know exactly which way we're heading, so budgeting is not hard :)
Re: Feeling guilty about spending and saving money!
^ if you set urself a goal its not that hard
it is very tempting to buy something, but as adrastia said, if u walk away and a week later u still want to get it, then get it.
I most of the time dont want it after 5 minutes. When i was single, it was a different story. Id prob go get something in 2-3 different colours cus i felt like it
Re: Feeling guilty about spending and saving money!
When it comes to budgeting...Im horrible! However, when Im shopping and I see something that is a bit on the pricey side I wait a while before I make the move. I think about it, look for deals, see if there are alternatives and then I buy if its still on my mind.
Re: Feeling guilty about spending and saving money!
Gosh I wish I knew how to save. Once upon a time, I did. But now it just goes out the window. My father has been supporting me financially since like forever and now im working parttime but I still feel soooo guilty sometimes spending all that money of his. I try real hard to walk away from things that I like but I just cannot seem to stop myself from going back the very next day to get the things I put back on the rack.
I need to learn to stop shopping. But so many things are just necessities... makeup, makeup removers, facials, hand lotions, face creams, waxing, threading, mani-pedis, warm clothes, good shoes, heavy jackets, FOOD.... its hard to survive if you aint got the money.
yeh i used to feel guilty, but nt as much now. I tried to save money at any chance i cud, but anytime i wud save i wud have to lend money and not get it back, helping family members, or i wud get smacked in the face with a bill or some emergency expenditure :( :( So all the saving up and beinga total kunjoos was pointless!
Re: Feeling guilty about spending and saving money!
if you set for yourself a goal.. something like financial freedom at so and so age.. it would be easy to focus on saving.. its hard to convince urself to save just randomly.. i saved up moe than 90% of all my salary and finally paid off the second mortgage.. it feels good not to pay all this interest now... last thing i want is to carry a debt with these unnecessary impulse buys.
if you are saving a good amount and spending some every now and then ..shouldn't make u feel guilty..