I once recorded my parents voiced during a fight. They always lie they didn’t force me in marriage while they did, they did many things and they deny that in front of other people.
They were once fighting again, so I recorded their voices. My mother always accuses me of things I never did of said. Like having had all kinds of boyfriends and in front of other people, she denies. But I do have that on tape now.
They always say hurtfull things, and then deny in front of everyone. My mother even said that I was caught in the kitchen with the brother of my cousin, I mean husband. Now it’s on tape that she said that. That was one of the important lies she often says in fights and then she denies that too in front of other people. Those are all terrible accusations and she knows they’re untrue, that’s the worst part of it, she wants to hurt me so she accuses me of the worst possible things in her mind.
I wish I could have bought a recorder when awful things happened during my marriage. One of the most awful things was, when the younger brother of my husband was telling me he liked me, was in love with me, that I was much more beautiful than his own wife, that he rather wanted me, etc. 
he said he didn’t care about the fact that I was married to his brother and that his own wife was in hospital, she was about to have their first child! They put her there weeks earlier, because there were problems. So his mother was in hospital with his wife and he came home earlier to go to hospital. I was alone, making roti, and he just shocked me when he said those things. He said nobody would ever believe me if I would tell anyone. I was already accused of things I didn’t even do, so I was afraid to say something to anyone. But months later when my cousin and I moved with his older brother and older brothers wife and children to another house, he argued with me and said my father was bad, he had done this and that in his youth, things I don’t even know they’re true or not, he kept saying I had bad blood in me, so eventually I cried that he should take a look at his own brother, who had told me while his own wife was in hospital for their first child that he liked me more than his own wife and wanted me, so who is the real awful person, who really has awful blood, besides, the blood thing he had said was ridicilous, since he is the son of my mother older sister, so my blood and his blood was the same anyway. First he believed me, he was angry with that brother, his parents came, they were all angry with me while I didn’t do anything but tell what their son had said to me, but they blamed me. They said that it was my own fault and that I was trying to let the brother argue! They all blamed me in the end. Then his mother said I wasn’t allowed to tell anyone what had happened, but she called my mother and the rest of the sisters and told everyone lies about what had happened and accused me instead!
Whenever my mother really is angry, she tries to hurt me, she always tells the lie that I was “caught in the kitchen with their son”, while it’s not even true. It was me myself who had told everyone what the brother of my cousin, I mean husband, had said to me, I was never caught. Besides, there was nothing to be caught at, since I was only making roti and he was the one who was saying those awful things to me while he had no right to say those things to me! Most family members believed the lies against me. They all turned even more against me, while I didn’t do anything, I only reported the sexual intimidation, because that’s what it was, that’s what it felt like to me, I only reported what he had said to me. I didn’t do anything wrong and I told him off. But they all believed him, maybe because he’s a male and I only a female.
I wish I would have had a tape of his voice, while he was saying those awful things to me. That would take away the nasty accusations against me.
After I had opened my mouth and told my couhusband how his brother was after me, while I was making roti, not only did I get all the blame myself, but the marriage got even worse. This thing what had happened, made everything even more worse. I really wish I could have had that on tape, so I could have at least proof of my innocence.
It still hurts me, even today, it still hurts me that even the person I was given to in marriage, didn’t believe me. Once, because of anger, I wanted to take revenge and I said to hurt him, that I forgive his younger brother, because it’s so frustrating that he, the husband, didn’t even believe me while I was innocent. He mistreated me for nothing. I didn’t do anything wrong. I feel such hatred for him and his brothers, even today, after all those years, I still hate all five of them. I was innocent. this is so depressing