Why do women have kids with these man babies? Is it that tough to gauge somebody’s potential for being a good dad. Why do these men have kids? Don’ t they know about birth control? They’re definitely not ready to have kids, then why go ahead and impregnate someone? Why not wait until they feel they’re ready?
It most definitely has something to do with the Pakistani society’s expectation of married people having babies within an year of getting married. Why can’t people just wait and figure out what’s best for them. It’s just baffling how stupid we are.
Because people flip out that their daughters could be 25+ and single. So they get married to the best choice that comes along, and sometimes, that choice ends up being a bad husband and a bad father. And the girl is then stuck.
Forget fatherhood, a lot of men just shouldn't get married. When you have no skills/ intention of doing justice/ keeping a balance to the women you're bringing into your family then don't get married. But that's hardly the thinking that goes behind most marriages so yeah...
Why do women have kids with these man babies? Is it that tough to gauge somebody's potential for being a good dad. Why do these men have kids? Don' t they know about birth control? They're definitely not ready to have kids, then why go ahead and impregnate someone? Why not wait until they feel they're ready?
It most definitely has something to do with the Pakistani society's expectation of married people having babies within an year of getting married. Why can't people just wait and figure out what's best for them. It's just baffling how stupid we are.
From what I've seen first hand, some women are fixated on the baby and becoming a mother aspect, common sense and everything else goes completely out of the window. These are completely sensible women, who would themselves advise others to wait given their situation.
People don’t understand how hard it is to have and raise a child until they actually have one. It sounds nice having a baby, someone to cuddle and love, but then you’re hit with the work that comes with having a baby and a lot of people are not ready for that.
Also, in our desi samaaj, people think that having a baby will solve miyan biwi problems. Oh your husband isn’t mature enough? That’s fine, just have a baby and he’ll grow up.
get ure gay son married, marriage will solve his issues
get a baby, it will make him grow up
have a son, it will make him a man
and on and on it goes … problem starting with the parents, and their parents, and the parents before them. etc etc.
if one woman can mess up a son, another can set him straight as a wife or kick him out…instead of making babies…
so really… it boils down to women having to be the smarter of the 2. :halo: (in that kinda situation)!!
Because people flip out that their daughters could be 25+ and single. So they get married to the best choice that comes along, and sometimes, that choice ends up being a bad husband and a bad father. And the girl is then stuck.
Nope she isn't. She says no. She gets a divorce. She moves on. Don't play the victim card with your own life when you can and decide to do stuff.
From what I've seen first hand, some women are fixated on the baby and becoming a mother aspect, common sense and everything else goes completely out of the window. These are completely sensible women, who would themselves advise others to wait given their situation.
So basically women coax men into having kids because they want to be a mommy. And well his mom wants to be a grandma. With so many people telling him it's going to be okay, he gives in saying what's the worst that could happen, instead of manning up and being the voice of reason.
Some people shud never have babies, they will never be ready, goes for both men and women.
If half the assessment that's done for a couple before adoption was done for allowing pregnancy, there will be no issue of rising population.
They married because they wanted companionship, they didn't want to be alone. Now if they weren't Muslim or were not in Pakistan, they wouldn't have to marry to get that. But I don't remember people back home living together without being married. Nope. So marriage is the only way you get to be with the opposite gender.
Having kids is something entirely different. Not everybody wants to have them. Or people wait until they're ready to take up that responsibility. Besides it's not like we're facing extinction or something. If I don't have kids, the human race will still go on. It'll be dumber, but it'll manage.
Nope she isn't. She says no. She gets a divorce. She moves on. Don't play the victim card with your own life when you can and decide to do stuff.
^ This!!! I'm not sure why so many women are so keen to play the victim card when there are many things which are very much within our control. Ironically, it's often these same women who are always on about how independent and atypical they are.
dear saeed, if they really want a companionship then they should now the next phase is fatherhood. As cycle of life is defined. If a man just want a woman for physical attraction n no kids then he should communicate his thoughts to future wife so there should be some understanding abt kids.
This issue arises becoz a man is no ready where a woman need a child. so there is no need to mark a question on someone answer dear. If u agree, good , if not then reply without pointing someone dear.
dear saeed, if they really want a companionship then they should now the next phase is fatherhood. As cycle of life is defined. If a man just want a woman for physical attraction n no kids then he should communicate his thoughts to future wife so there should be some understanding abt kids.
^ He is not saying that they should never have kids or that they get married only for physical attraction. His point is that it would be wise to wait until one is mentally, emotionally, and financially ready. I find it very difficult to believe that people are read to take on such a responsibility only a couple months after getting married. Simply being married does not make one mentally, emotionally, and financially prepared to care for a child. Also, while having children many be the next step after marriage, there are definitely precautions people can to prevent to delay this if they are not yet ready.
This issue arises becoz a man is no ready where a woman need a child. so there is no need to mark a question on someone answer dear. If u agree, good , if not then reply without pointing someone dear.
No. The issue arises when women know that their husband is not prepared to be a father yet insist on having a child because of the ridiculous old wives' tale that "He is not ready for a child? Oh, he'll be ready when the child is born."
^ it depends on mutual understanding. If husband is not ready n wife wants it then he should be limited in their relation to avoid it. Whether a husband should convince her wife or wife should have. couple should be ready for every upcoming stage after marriage.
I know this situation and going through it, so it is easy to say dear. No offence but its hard for one who is going through.
^ it depends on mutual understanding. If husband is not ready n wife wants it then he should be limited in their relation to avoid it. Whether a husband should convince her wife or wife should have. couple should be ready for every upcoming stage after marriage.
I know this situation and going through it, so it is easy to say dear. No offence but its hard for one who is going through.
With all due respect, having a child is not something to be taken lightly and most certainly not something you "convince" another person to do. You cannot "convince" someone to mature and become mentally and emotionally ready for a child. That is something they must decide on their own and when they are ready. It's this idea that people can be "convinced" into parenthood that results in the drama and problems that Saeed is referring to. Having a child is a lifetime responsibility and is something BOTH parties must be on the same page about and agree on of their own free will.
