Re: Fathers who aren't ready for parenthood
With all due respect, having a child is not something to be taken lightly and most certainly not something you "convince" another person to do. You cannot "convince" someone to become mentally and emotionally ready for a child. That is something they must decide on their own and when they are ready. It's this idea that people can be "convinced" into it that results in the drama and problems Saeed is referring to.Having a child is a lifetime responsibility and is something B*OTH parties must be on the same page about and agree on of their own free will.*
when u get married, its not just one's free will dear.
Re: Fathers who aren't ready for parenthood
when u get married, its not just one's free will dear.
I never stated that it was only about one person's will. Marriage is not about only one person's wishes and that goes both ways. Therefore, if a wife wishes to have a child and her husband is not ready, she cannot and should not simply proceed and ignore her husband's opinion on the matter. Marriage is partnership and BOTH people must be in agreement on important decisions.
What I stated was that when it comes to important and life changing decisions such as having children, both people must be in agreement and reach that agreement on their own because they are ready and it is what they want, not because someone "convinced" them or talked them into it.
Re: Fathers who aren't ready for parenthood
hence u agree on my "mutual understanding" point :) mentioned in post # 19
Re: Fathers who aren't ready for parenthood
^ Yes, I agree that having children requires mutual understanding. What I disagree on is this statement that people are ready to have children simply because they are married and that they should have children simply because it's the next step:
dear saeed, if they really want a companionship then they should now the next phase is fatherhood.
That's how interpreted your above comment. If I misunderstood and that is not what you meant, I apologise. :)
Re: Fathers who aren’t ready for parenthood
apology accepted 
no worries. 
Re: Fathers who aren't ready for parenthood
two misconceptions that prevail in our society
1. A woman is always and always ready to have a child since woman have that motherly instinct in her by nature so she really doesn't have to prepare herself to be a mommy, this comes as a built in feature with every woman.
- A man is considered ready to be a father if he is able to take care of the kid financially. Aspects like mental readiness and emotional readiness are not even the factors to give a thought about.
these two misconceptions produce many unhappy couples and unhappy children.
Re: Fathers who aren't ready for parenthood
Nope she isn't. She says no. She gets a divorce. She moves on. Don't play the victim card with your own life when you can and decide to do stuff.
How about don't make the stupid decision of marrying an idiot in the first place, just because you're about to hit 25?
I didn't say that what they do is right. I said that's simply how a lot of these women think. They think they can't get out, and feel stuck. Stigma of a divorced woman is strong still, you can't exactly blame them for sticking through a bad situation, and we see that all the time. Think of all the retarded ridiculous uncles you know and then that their wife stayed with them.
Re: Fathers who aren't ready for parenthood
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