You know, retaliotor, you bring up some good points. But there is a problem here. He is not being honest with his wife. That is it.
Her reaction is who she is. If she does something stupid, well then, she’d be aware of what she’s doing and what consequences would follow, which she would have to pay for. Her reaction is in her control. It is not upto the father to rationalize his responsibility to his wife to be honest by trying to control her behavior to such an atrocity.
It is not about women allowing their husbands to remarry or their sexual needs. It is about being honest to the friggin person you promised to take care of forever. Even if you married them out of pressure from family/whoever, YOU are the one who took that decision. If you can’t deal with it, end the relationship respectfully, give her what she deserves, give the kids what they deserve and then go marry the other woman.
For God’s sake, if anyone brings up the “fact” that in Islam men are allowed to marry more than one woman, well, you need to shut your hole and go READ the Quran. And well, when you read, use your brain. It CLEARLY states the part about marrying more women after it talks about orphan kids and women with no husbands, for support. It clearly says that you marry more than one woman if your first wife allows it AND IF the other woman is in need for protection, and not because you are unable to deal with your marital issues. Go read some more about the rights of wives. A man is SUPPOSED to take care of her and NOT hurt her. In which world would a religion that preaches taking care of the wife also preach that you can hurt her in the worst way possible by marrying another woman?
*All the assumptions made in this post do not necessarily portray the situation with OP’s father. This is a reply to past couple of posts.