Re: Family favors
PCG, your parents are enablers. They are allowing the brother and his kid to take advantage of them and being doormats for them. And although they have the very best of good intentions, they are harming both the brother and his kid by enabling all of their destructive behavior to continue.
When you have a child with a developmental issue, you have to structure rules and guidelines SO much more than you do with typically developing kids. They CAN learn, they just need it to be much more structured and broken down into easier to follow directions. If this is done, there is such a better chance for their future. By giving in and letting things "go", the kid will never thrive and never fit in. What will become of him in his later years? Parents dont live forever.
And the freeloading brother. He needs to realize that just because he's the youngest brother, he STILL needs to grow up and take responsibility for himself and his child. He will never do this as long as he has your mom to take care of him and his every want.
But things will not change one whit unless and until your mom and dad stop being doormats for these people.