What are your guys feelings on exchanging pictures with potential rishtas before meeting. I’ve been asked to send a picture to someone and I just feel weird about it. Am I overreacting?
Re: Exchanging Pictures
What are your guys feelings on exchanging pictures with potential rishtas before meeting. I've been asked to send a picture to someone and I just feel weird about it. Am I overreacting?
pehle yeh batao kis ko picture send kar rahe ho??
Re: Exchanging Pictures
i'd feel weird too.... are they interested in your personality and who you are, or your looks? and are they sending a picture for you to evaluate also?
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Well there have been talks with a family friend regarding one of their cousins who is seeking a rishta. The family friend called my aunt requesting that I send a picture to their cousin.
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i'd feel weird too.... are they interested in your personality and who you are, or your looks? and are they sending a picture for you to evaluate also?
That's exactly what I said, I would rather meet the person first, chat and then decide rather than sending a picture and letting them decide if they want to meet me or not based on that. My aunt did say he would send me a picture too though.
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ok i was confused for a bit... nevermind... i sorted it out. haha :P
don't do it if you're uncomfortable... you have the right idea, anyway. its kind of rude to base any future meetings on whether or not your good-looking enough for them.
Re: Exchanging Pictures
Well there have been talks with a family friend regarding one of their cousins who is seeking a rishta. The family friend called my aunt requesting that I send a picture to their cousin.
Hmmmm
marzi hai, send karo ya na karo...:)
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I think this is the norm, not something very amusing but this is how it goes...both parties exchange pictures and talk on phone, if they are interested in each other, they set a time for meet, if not then then move on. Since many ppl are living in different states therefore first meeting is difficult and therefore it is talking on ph, then picture, then more talking, then they decide if they really want to meet. Kind of same like these online marriages...you talk, then you see the picture, if you are still interested, you make another move and exchange numbers, etc.... oh and basically it is the guy who sends the picture first. If you think the guy looks acceptable and you'll be willing to talk to him then send yours and hope he'd be willing to talk to you aswell.
oh well i wish there was a better way...
Re: Exchanging Pictures
I think this is the norm, not something very amusing but this is how it goes...both parties exchange pictures and talk on phone, if they are interested in each other, they set a time for meet, if not then then move on. Since many ppl are living in different states therefore first meeting is difficult and therefore it is talking on ph, then picture, then more talking, then they decide if they really want to meet. Kind of same like these online marriages...you talk, then you see the picture, if you are still interested, you make another move and exchange numbers, etc.... oh and basically it is the guy who sends the picture first. If you think the guy looks acceptable and you'll be willing to talk to him then send yours and hope he'd be willing to talk to you aswell.
oh well i wish there was a better way...
Hmmm...
Ab to picture bhej hi doooo,maze aaye ga...
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erm u sed u wud like to meet n den send a picture , wts the point he wil hve seen u then anyway . lolz.
anyways usually its sending a picture first and yes bleev it or not ppl do tend to gor looks to not onli personality , we all did too ladies dont deny it .
anyways its up to u .
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Hmmm... Ab to picture bhej hi doooo,maze aaye ga...
Actually, it is not very entertaining, kind of gets annoying at times. Again, I wish there was a better way...
erm u sed u wud like to meet n den send a picture , wts the point he wil hve seen u then anyway . lolz.
anyways usually its sending a picture first and yes bleev it or not ppl do tend to gor looks to not onli personality , we all did too ladies dont deny it .
anyways its up to u .
well being physically attracted to the person is very important and if you feel the person is not your kind then just finish over there. And when someone is talking to you on phone for such a thing, they'd like to associate a face with the person they are talking to.
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erm u sed u wud like to meet n den send a picture , wts the point he wil hve seen u then anyway . lolz.
anyways usually its sending a picture first and yes bleev it or not ppl do tend to gor looks to not onli personality , we all did too ladies dont deny it .
anyways its up to u .
I never said i wanted to meet the person and then send a picture, becasue like you said what is the point they already saw me, I said that I would rather meet them in person, chat and then decide if we want to move forward.
Yes, but I do agree, everyone judges each other to some degree based on physical appearance. I also think pictures lie, and seeing a person face to face is the best way to make any "judgements"
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i think its very normal
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are you sending it just by yourself or your parents know about it? their parents know about it? if yes, than any potential rishta deserves know how their potential partner looks like.
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it is the norm in our culture, agreed it makes u kinda uncomfortable but then again A DESI GOTTA DO WAT A DESI GOTTA DO :k: hope this made sense.
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OMG that is not the norm where I live, where I live u meet up- with parents there obviously, and ta da salaam or kudahafiz- at least this way u get to talk and see the person
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I personally feel that it is quite weird to send out pics to these rishta people. When I was growing up, we had a few come to our house for cousins or whoever and I hated how the poor girl was analyzed to bits from her hair to teeth to feet. Besides, the families don't just restrict the pics to their opinions- they are passed onto the entire khaandaan and the whole clan of aunties and so many comments are passed. I told my mom I would never settle for that nonsense. I chose my own husband in school so I never dealt with these rishtas but I told my mom early on that if I were to go through this process, I would not hand out my pics to strangers to be scrutinized. I have too much self respect for that. If they want to see me then come, fly, take a train or whatever and meet me in person.
Re: Exchanging Pictures
What are your guys feelings on exchanging pictures with potential rishtas before meeting. I've been asked to send a picture to someone and I just feel weird about it. Am I overreacting?
.. then why would you want someones picture** After** the meeting?
.. think about this way...what is the point of wasting your time and energy and driving down to someones .. and meet him/her and then say NO on the basis of his/her looks? won't it feel more humiliating if someone sees you in person and rejects you after coming to your place?...I think its better to send someone a picture to give him/her the idea about your looks. its the starter.
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thats just so superficial though… IF you pass their “looks test”, then they’ll honour you with a visit. it puts the power entirely in one of their hands and makes the other person feel like an object and not a person. plus how would you feel if they “withdrew their offer” based on your pic? i know i’d feel pretty crap.
at least when you meet, both parties are on an even playing field and can decide.
i agree with shay, and i, as well, told my folks to cut it out after one, particularly bad, chai-serving incident, which amounts to the same thing more or less… judging you based on, what, your chai-making skills this time? or your housekeeping skills? or your hospitality skills? i’ve been to nicer job interviews! like one friend put it, are they finding a maasi or a daughter in law that they needed to see you serve chai? ![]()
this whole picture showing thing before meeting amounts to the same kind of personal humiliation, in my mind.
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^ i agree with your comment. (1st paragraph).