Equality in Marriage...

[badabing]

Re: Equality in Marriage…

@Muzna

So you’re picky about your wife being muslim but you’re okay with a surrogate? is that Islamically allowed?
There are many good women out there…women who go above and beyond when it comes to doing their share yet men with opinions as “colourful” as you have trouble seeing the positive. (And isnt’ it convenient that all the women in your own household are fine. )

And just so you know…there are plenty of examples where the choice to stay at home and provide a wholesome, secure environment for a developing child is not solely the woman’s. Many men see the benefits in not leaving child rearing to hired help, at least for the first 3 or 4 formative years of a child’s life until they start schooling.

As far as I recall, the discussion is centered around the fact that the responsibility to support the household during the marriage rests squarely on the shoulders of the husband according to Islamic rules. There is no requirement for the woman to contribute to the family expenses (home, clothing, food, etc.) but if she chooses to do so then every cent she contributes is deemed sadaqa for her. So it’s not about what happens if and when they decide to go their separate ways.

Condolences to your chacha. There are many good men out there that have been taken advantage of. Insha Allah the Almighty will reward them ten-fold for their sacrifices and suffering.

In terms of protecting your interests…both parties should do so. The Islamic system, when administered justly does that as does the civil system. I’m not as familiar with the UK laws but from what I understand of the North American system, many judges will allow both parties to protect those assets which they brought to the marriage. And if that is not enough then drafting a pre-nup can take care of all such interests.

I agree 100% with your post. As for my cacha, he is still married to her. I know the rights/responsibilities of both men/women in a marriage - but women tend to go for the jugular during divorce and adopt the British legal system’s approach of no blame + split of assets under the guise of following the law of the land you live in. I have no issue with women who become housewives due to joint decision or even at the behest of their husband - in such cases if they divorce, I have no issue with a woman getting 50% assets plus spousal support. It’s the entitled breed of British Pakistani women i’m talking about, who I have to say are more and more prevalent nowadays here - I work with them on an everyday basis from corporate lawyers to accountants to financial professionals, alot of them have this entitled mentality. Surrogacy, lol, I know that’s haram, I was joking. Prenups can be thrown out, it depends on what side of the bed the judge woke up. The only way a British Pakistani man can secure himself is to only do nikah without the civil registration or rely on trusts which causes a loss of absolute control.