a close friend of my sister, who is only 17 or 18 right now, just got engaged a couple of days back. she comes from a very well off and educated family ... but all of the women in her family get married early. it would probably be not more than 3 years from now that she gets married as well. they're all into looking good, knowing how to make yourself up, household things, and kitty parties. she wants to join LUMS after finishing her a'levels ... but if she gets married in between her BA (which would probably be the case) ... she doesnt want to continue studying after, or finish her BA even for that matter.
comparing this to my sister ... it feels so awkward ... i could never imagine in a billion years for my sister to be getting engaged right now ... or getting married in 2-3 years.
I am totally against those parents who think of their daughters as burden and marry them of.There are lot of examples in society which can open people's eyes but they don't wanna look.Recently my friend's sister got married and she is only 18 or 19 thats too young.She hasn't finished her high school yet and what is she gonna provide her generation.
sometimes ppl dont think of their daughters as a burden,but in islam marriage is completing half your deen...
family background and personality should be to the same level as the boys family,and no amount of education is going to teach you how to respect others,that comes from your upbringing
a girl should be educated but if a good rishta is there it should be considered,and always ask the girl...
I do want my daughter to get married in her early 20's but not after high school. I want her to get educated atleast to her bachelors degree level and then I would like her to get married either by her choice or ours. I was able to finish my 2nd bachelors degree after I got married but i wouldn't do it again. Having a bachelors degree for her wouldn't be an option but then to further her education would be her own choice.
These parents feel there is no point in investing in the daughter's education as it's not going to be of any benefit to them when she gets married and leaves. They'd rather save their money and spend it on their sons as the financial responsibility for the house will fall on them. Not saying it's right but that's how things work in families where money is tight.
How little love can you have for your daughters if you are denying them their right to education. I know families like these. Even if these people had money, trust me, the education of their daughters would still be secondary.
In my opinion, it depends on the individuals. If the girl wants to study then she should be allowed to do so, if she doesn't have any interest then she shouldn't be forced or bullied into it.
Many desi families think it's the end of the world if their child is not interesting in studies. Being very educated doesn't mean your a better person!.. girls that are less educated shouldn't be looked down at or
judged.
In the west it's not a big deal if your any less educated. I personally believe studies are a waste of time unless your going into some sort of profession like being a Dr, Lawyer, Teacher etc..
Reading this thread makes me sick. Not that I don't know about all the fu**ed up mindsets that most desis have, but a reminder off that in one place, that's too much :(
Although people's replies do give me hope that common sense will prevail in the end.
well i think its important 2educate daughters,not only educate but aslo gv them the well nedded TERBIYAT...only education can't change someone,there should be TARBIYAT from parents as well,marriage is very important thing then just,teh celebrations etc etc.....nowdays all teh focas is on thecelebrations...marriage is a life long relation which need ur full enegry,love,attention,....
well i think parents hould marry their daughters wen they r mentally ready....if a gal of 18 is matured enough to marry then there no reason to avoid....education is really important if a gal wants to be doctor etc then she should be allowed to do so,nowdays i have seen gals continuing their studies after marriage also..
important thing should be the TERBIYAT....
