Re: Educating your daughters
I am totally against those parents who think of their daughters as burden and marry them of.There are lot of examples in society which can open people's eyes but they don't wanna look.Recently my friend's sister got married and she is only 18 or 19 thats too young.She hasn't finished her high school yet and what is she gonna provide her generation.
Re: Educating your daughters
This topic reminds me of the film An Education -- did you see that?
At the same time, I do think that part of what goes in these days is a backlash against my generation of Pakistani girls growing up in the West, and those a little older than us, many of whom resisted marriage until our late twenties, and were suddenly not considered any more as spouses. I feel like there's a sudden wave of marriages to white girls or to girls FROM Pakistan, and I can understand why parents of Pakistani girls from the West would be concerned now.
I loved that movie!
But also, don't you think the backlash is rooted in the whole less value attached to an independent, careerminded, older girl than someone fresh out of high school, which again, is kind of ridiculuos. So its understandable, maybe, but still not a good way of going about and doing things. And don't even get me started on all those guys who date Pakistani girls from the West but marry Pakistani girls from Pakistan. It drives me up the wall- there is so much wrong with that picture.
Re: Educating your daughters
I should see that movie.
Re: Educating your daughters
Even today, I see families who are dying to get their daughters married off as soon as they hit 18. I am all for getting married young and all, yeah, but, how about some education?
I think that in this day and age, every woman should have some basic education for the following reasons:
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So why do we still see families not getting that their daughters will be better wives, better parents if they have a better educational foundation? Why the rush in getting your girls out of the home? Why not invest in their education?
I never understood that either.Forget about parents ,i have noticed a trend that aaj kal ki beti jees are more interested in getting married than to get proper education. I dont think they see the importance.
and well the double standard is there because most desis know that their betis will marry a desi dude whos never going to allow her to work ,so why bother putting all that money in her education and rather invest that in her jahez and gold jewelry.And other times desi inlaws dont give the respect to educated lady as she should be.Our society always wants to see a weak dukhi lady who u can supress and control.Educating her means ,she would develop some self respect and sense of her own.Now why would one want to do that?
Re: Educating your daughters
.Our society always wants to see a weak dukhi lady who u can supress and control.Educating her means ,she would develop some self respect and sense of her own.Now why would one want to do that?
so true
Re: Educating your daughters
.Our society always wants to see a weak dukhi lady who u can supress and control.Educating her means ,she would develop some self respect and sense of her own.Now why would one want to do that?
no wonder our mothers and mothers in law love the drama that has a dukhi larki crying for probably as long as the drama is aired.. so many times I have found my mom watching the drama and shedding tears.. upon asking what happened, genereally the reply was "bechari heroine kitni dukhi hai" gotta love my mom :D
Re: Educating your daughters
Moms who try to get their daughter marry @ 18, most of the time are non-educated themselves.
Girl should at least have so much education that in bad times if no-one else, she at least should be able to support herself. Education not only help them get independent but also help them become better moms
Re: Educating your daughters
D6C, I'm seeing many educated folks in rush to get their daughters married off. Maybe it's the shortage of "good" rishtas, fear of their daughters going astray...dunno. I think if we parents work on providing a solid foundation for our girls, we shouldn't be worried about those situations as well as help change the shape of our societal norms.
Re: Educating your daughters
wat does education here meann??
is it her gaining knowledge n exposure to the world..........
or
is it a means to to enable someone to earn a livelihood??
the way i have seen education is.......if someone is 'educated' till 12th grade......they have basic education to enable them to make informed decisions n ability to handle the world...
education beyond 12th grade is just like working towards building a career/means of livelihood........
and i wonder.......why 'higher' education is so much of an importance at all? everywhere i see....girls education is the topic only.......... why don't girls get into business or something?? why limit them to 'education based' careers only?? do u think ur daughters are too dumb too do business??
Re: Educating your daughters
^
education means both- high school doesn't teach you what you need to know in order to support yourself independently, unless you want your daughter to work at a mc donalds for the rest of her life. it also gives you a very limited world view into people, places, opinions, thoughts, cultures, and the world at large. you're still so immature at graduation, you don't really realise what life is about until you get to college and/or university and experience that, and then beyond that, actually work for a few years.
don't know who you know but i know plenty of ladies who do more than just become teachers, if that's what you mean by education-based careers. firstly, there isn't anything wrong with being a teacher if that's what you want, but outside of that, like i said, i know lots of successful lawyers, accountants, bankers, graphic designers, insurance brokers, etc. who are all women, both within my family and outside of it.
also, in order to do business or teach, you still need to go to college or university and sometimes do post-graduate degrees too.
most people aren't the type to make a go of running their own business, men OR women, but again, i know a few ladies who are very successful small business owners too.
i don't get your comments. you seem to be angry about the issue at hand...?
Re: Educating your daughters
don't know who you know but i know plenty of ladies who do more than just become teachers, if that's what you mean by education-based careers. firstly, there isn't anything wrong with being a teacher if that's what you want, but outside of that, like i said, i know lots of successful lawyers, accountants, bankers, graphic designers, insurance brokers, etc. who are all women, both within my family and outside of it.
i didn't mean teaching..i was referring to business side of things.......
i don't get your comments. you seem to be angry about the issue at hand...?
now that is totally judgemental on ur part.....how and where did i suggest i am angry at gir's education??
i am merely pointing out that girls should be involved in business too........y is that not encouraged....
Re: Educating your daughters
^ like i said, your tone came across a bit angry. apologies if that's not what you meant.
most of the girls in my family are encouraged to do what interests them hence a variety of careers. my SIL is a lawyer, my cousin is a doctor, another cousin is a montessori teacher, i'm a graphic designer... its more about what the girl wants to study than what she should study, imho.
Re: Educating your daughters
As far as marriage is concerned dont men/inlaws want educated women rather than uneducated?
Re: Educating your daughters
As far as marriage is concerned dont men/inlaws want educated women rather than uneducated?
thats a life1 topic.....
btw.....do inlaws even matter??
Re: Educating your daughters
What's the point of educating your daughters beyond the basics and encouraging them to pursue their passions and interests, when they will be discouraged from working (or choose not to work of their own accord) once they have children?
Re: Educating your daughters
What's the point of educating your daughters beyond the basics and encouraging them to pursue their passions and interests, when they will be discouraged from working (or choose not to work of their own accord) once they have children?
What if the girls are in education for sake of education (much more fashionable to be in campus than wasting time at home), they really don't have serious career aspiration other than finding employment in case of financial crisis? Yes there are people like that out there. Not everything is parents' hands, they can only plan so much for their grown up kids.
Re: Educating your daughters
I don't know about others but my parents are Alhumdolillah all up for the idea of proper education that can help their daughters get exposure, gain knowledge and become a better person!
Education in my family is important too but as someone stated that girls get married right after bachelors, no work(job) whatsoever.. same happens in my family too and when asked the reason the answer is, "jitna parhna tha parh lia!!"
This gotta change too!!! There is no limit to studies and whats the use of studying so hard when you cant even imply it anywhere in real life, let others be a part of that too..let people learn from you and let yourself learn from them! One of my cousins is in last year at med school and she got married last year and she wont be staying in the country as soon as she finishes school, no house job even!! I agree the education has made her a better person in terms of knowledge but thats about it. And as rolla coaster said, even shes okay with the idea!!! tsk
Re: Educating your daughters
What if the girls are in education for sake of education (much more fashionable to be in campus than wasting time at home),
Do you mean they are learning for the sake of learning or getting an education cuz that's what's fashionable?
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they really don't have serious career aspiration other than finding employment in case of financial crisis? Yes there are people like that out there. Not everything is parents' hands, they can only plan so much for their grown up kids.
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I think that it depends on the kind of school they're going to. I am firmly against the women who take up seats in competitive degree programs (law school, med school, etc) with no intention of practicing ever. Girls are often better at school; they beat out their male counterparts only to do nothing with their learning. That's not okay.
Re: Educating your daughters
Do you mean they are learning for the sake of learning or getting an education cuz that's what's fashionable?
** I think that it depends on the kind of school they're going to. I am firmly against the women who take up seats in competitive degree programs (law school, med school, etc) with no intention of practicing ever. Girls are often better at school; they beat out their male counterparts only to do nothing with their learning. That's not okay**.
True. Thats another trend especially seen among people who are wealthy in Pakistan. I know a few cases myself where the girls are either MBA, MSc or MBBS, and never used the knowledge. The only reason they got the degree in the first place was "time pass", because they knew from the beginning, that their parents/inlaws/family wont let them practice later on. A bit sad considering the state in Pakistan where doctors etc etc are needed.
Re: Educating your daughters
Do you mean they are learning for the sake of learning or getting an education cuz that's what's fashionable?
I think that it depends on the kind of school they're going to. I am firmly against the women who take up seats in competitive degree programs (law school, med school, etc) with no intention of practicing ever. Girls are often better at school; they beat out their male counterparts only to do nothing with their learning. That's not okay.
I'm not generalizing, yes but there are girls/families who just want degree because it'd get them a better rishta not necessarily a better job.