When i go out with my hubby, i sometimes look at other couples (mostly desi) and I see the hubby walking or standing about 2-3 meters away from his wife.. and the bechari wife is standing their looking totally ghum sum, looking after some bratty kid…
and I always turn around to my hubby and go… maybe if they just dressed up for one another, they’d be standing right next to each other, or holding hands and looking like they totally loved one another..
I dunno.. its a silly thought really… but i just sometimes want to run up to the wifey and fix her hair and get her a nice outfit or something, to make her hubby look her way… i know its prob a pathetic thought.. who am i to ponder about someone else’s relationship.. lekin i do..
I guess I just like to look nice for my hubster… not that im in make-up all day long.. no… i just like to look clean and maybe fix my hair in a way that hubby likes… thats about it. But, it makes him happy.. makes me happy. Life is good
^ I guess... actually yes ur right. I have seen that at functions. Wives are all dolled up and looking hot and the guys look like they're going to a footy game..
but here I wonder, do not the wives say anything?
The rule with us is, if one is looking nice, the other has to do just the same... who cares if we're jsut getting the groceries! we dont get time for one another any other way.. so make the most of it
me too. i rarely dress up for my husband and he too is so lazy about it. he only loves trousers in winter and 3/4 in summer. i, my self, too lazy to dress up and my hubby often tells me that i am not a woman.................as i dont act and behave like one.
my SIL fully dresses up everyweek end whether staying home or going out and spends about 3-4 hours getting ready. i tell her all the times that i will follow he footsteps than too lazy to do so.
^ 4-5 hours! ai hai.. no ive never ever spent that long in getting ready
I just like to wear something nice for hubster.. prob i dunno straighten my hair and put a gloss on.. Even when i was on maternity leave (and I think this is the reasno why i do it) i used to feel gross all day and then it'd just depress me.. so i would take a shower, put something nice on and make myself feel special..
I dress up for my fiance all the time.. he does too..
Makes a world of a difference.
Another thing, spouses/partners should never forget to say:
-- you look beautiful/handsome today
-- Thank you
and mostly importantly,
--I love you.
Everyday...
Even on days when I look like crap, my fiance looks at me with eyes all glazed over with love..! Haha.. He tells me how beautiful I am and how he feels so lucky to have me... I tell him I look ugly! he laughs and says I don't see myself the way he sees me :)
When i go out with my hubby, i sometimes look at other couples (mostly desi) and I see the hubby walking or standing about 2-3 meters away from his wife.. and the bechari wife is standing their looking totally ghum sum, looking after some bratty kid...
and I always turn around to my hubby and go... maybe if they just dressed up for one another, they'd be standing right next to each other, or holding hands and looking like they totally loved one another..
Sadzzz i think there's alot more to that than just simply being dressed up. Could be they're having a bad day. or they had a fight or they are just not the type to be all lovey dovey esp in public. If u want to go deeper, maybe she doesn't feel that he appreciates her enough so she doesnt want to put in effort to look nice for him and he resents that she's let herself go...its a vicious cycle..
but anyway, you're right, dressing up for your spouse is a good thing and one should do as much as they possibly can, given their lifestyle and all. I know one thing guys could have a problem with is that the wife spends so much effort looking good for "strangers"... but as oson as she comes home makeup is off, clothes are changed etc and he doesnt get a chance to appreciate that.
Maybe they just don't feel its worth the fight to nag their husbands into dressing up
i guess u could perceive it as "nagging".. i look at it as more of a nice gesture.. i dunno.. my hubby tries to look nice for me.. and i totally love that
I love dressing up when we are going out(doesnt matter where we're going) but we both like comfortable clothing when at home. In the beginning of marriage I used to try to dress up but he didnt like it and ofcourse netiher did I. We love soft comfy PJs/shorts and Ts or sometimes shalwar kameez in my case.
^ yeah at home we're in trackies... or shilwar kameez if it doesnt need to be ironed lol.. lekin, i still "attempt" to make my hair look nice
i never did the whole dressing up at home thing that brides do.. well not with the jewellerry and things, lekin if we went out, then i would get dressed up for him (still do)
it fluctuates for me... i do go all out and dress up at home.. come 5 pm, im outta my salan stinking shalwar kameez and into some nice formal casual clothing with churiya and jewellary.. light lipstick... waiting for my sartaj to come home :D he really really appreciates it and loves me all dolled up
but sometimes i dont think it matters all that much cuz often he will come home and i'll be looking like a rag doll and he'll still say i look gorgeous... been married a yr and half and i dont think a day has gone by he hasnt said it atleast once, if not bombarding me with chichoray filmi phrases* left right and centre. then i dont think it really matters if i dress up cuz he still finds me pretty.
so now i soley wear my jahez clothes and churiya cuz my folks spent a lot of money doing all that for me and i'll be damned if i let it go to waste!
on the side, i realized one day... i had been lazy the entire week with looking presentable for hubby etc... kher.. we were goin to a dawat and i was dressing up doing this and that... we went.. came back and i went and changed, took my make up off.. got comfy again in some lawn shalwar kameez.... it hit me.. why did i dress up for the dawat? who did i care so much bout in that dawat that i felt the need to straighten my hair, do my make up, wear nice churiya and clothes... when the most important person who's opinion really matters to me, is sitting right next to me at home for whom i wasnt doing any of that for. so its really odd...women dressing up for the outside world but looknig like maasi museebtiya for the husbands... women should look nice for their husbands and vice versa.
even our religion asks us women to look presentable for our husbands.. din ki thakan uthar jathi hai, coming home and seeing your wife all clean and tidy and pretty.
The only time I look like a 'rag doll' is one day a week (in the weekend) when I'm doing household and cleaning up. Rest of the time I have to be made-up, clean etc cuz I go to work on weekdays. And I enjoy 'dressing up', doing my hair, make-up etc when I'm with husband anywayz :-)
He does the same for me too. When I look messy and tired he's messy too :D
and dont u girls think (who DO dres up) that it adds a bit of energy to your day with ure husband? like suddenly u both feel fresh and ready to take on things... i definately feel that difference from days when i dont make any effort.. husband will come home and be all tired and we will both be tired and blah together..
but days when i do dress up.. suddenly even if husband comes home tired.. he gets all charged up too...and the talking is much more alive and energetic... :)
mines doesnt care if i am dressed up or not, so i dont botter anymore .. LOL but i do dress up for work, what botters me that if i am dressed up for some party sharty, i expect some kind of comment from him, oh u are looking good but nothing really comes, he says it he doesnt need to tell me each time but I kind of expect it, so thats why I dont really dress up other than any event or just for myself.
thats really good that u do saadia.. yes its nice to hear from ure spouse that you are looking magnificent.. but if its just not in their nature.. then dont worry bout them.. but dont allow them to pull u down enuff to not even care bout urself anymore.... dress up and make urself feel better... cuz the first person that should love u, is u :)
