Does it matter if someone you want to marry is a virgin or not?

[khattichic]

re: Does it matter if someone you want to marry is a virgin or not?

@EDAL

I have never known a single Muslim guy here in America around my age group who didn’t want a virgin wife, didn’t matter if they were Paki, Afghan, Arab, Turkish, Somalian or whatever, all expressed a desire for a “pure” wife. Persians don’t seem to care though.

Their not fobs either, most were born here or raised here.

My Lebanese friends are especially adamant about it, even the ones who’ve done everything themselves. When it comes to marriage “no bro, she’s gotta be a virgin bro” lol, they so bro a lot.

For me personally a wife is something really special, she’s going to be the most important person for your children, I mean no one comes close to a mother, she should be someone who hasn’t slept with another man.

For girls loosing their virginity is a big deal, a huge emotional experience - it’s not like that for us. A girl never ever forgets her first , she will always have some sort of connection with that guy even if she doesn’t want to. I wouldn’t want that for a wife.

So does that include women who are divorced or widowed?

I’m not arguing that this particular point of view does not exist, but the hypocrisy of it all is sickening.

As a mother of 3 boys, you sure as heck better believe that I am raising them to the same lofty, high standards that are impressed upon girls. Far too often I see parents worrying about having “the talk” with their daughters, and stressing out over the threat of unplanned pregnancies, god forbid…from the the time of puberty, my mom ingrained in head “larkiyon ki izzat unkay haat may rehti hai”…well, I’m pounding that into my sons as well as soon as the time comes.. **“larkon ki bhi izzat unkay haaton main hai”, **they better not EVER role in here thinking that they are somehow excused from the bad stigma of losing their virginity, because as far as I know, it takes two to tango…the same moral evils that apply to girls apply to guys as well.

I can only do my best to try to instill morals and values in them. After a certain age, their life is in their own hands, however, just having the Y chromosome does not exempt them from cherishing/guarding their sexuality/virginity.