Re: do traditional professional girls still exist?
I get what you’re saying in that outward appearances don’t reveal everything about one’s inner state. However, the importance of it can’t be dismissed altogether. Your libaas does send out an impression about you to others. If it weren’t so, then there wouldn’t be a dress code in schools and the workplace and for various occasions (weddings/funerals/etc). And a violation of that code will make you stand out. If one wears a mini skirt to a job interview or attends a funeral as though they’re dressed for the beach, you can’t blame folks for making judgments in regards to how you perceive the occasion and yourself as well as your values (to an extent). We know the cliche saying, “Don’t judge a book by its cover,” however on the flip-side there’s also the saying that “Clothes make the man.” If they had no impact whatsoever you’d never people say that a certain style looks skanky or trashy or put-together or slovenly. And because your libaas sends messages about you, that’s also why it will both attract and repel certain types of people from you. Sometimes it can attract the wrong type of people. Consistent manner of dressing is more telling about a person, but unfortunately even one occasion alone can form a string impression.
[quote=“Theorist, post:14, topic:336302”]
Keep in mind these “traditional professional” girls may not be traditional because of how they were raised. They may simply be that way because of their personality and you never know when one does a 180 on you and gets in all sorts of bad habits. /QUOTE]
It can be argued that girls who only follow certain rules because they were strictly enforced by their patents might be more likely to rebel when they live away from their parents…whereas …girls who have a traditional personality are like that because they naturally incline toward traditional values…it’s what they willingly choose to do…and not because they’re feeling pressured…and if she has been consistently traditional all her life…then there’s something to be said for consistency, no? It may not be so easy for her to do a 180 turn if she feels comfortable and happy with a certain lifestyle and chose to follow it for years.
I don’t think OP’s requirements are unreasonable. We tend to look for a partner who is similar to us in level of religiousness and values…and yes…values are reflected in apparel and how you conduct yourself in public (and private). To dismiss this is folly. I do, however, agree with Sehrysh in that the traditional girl is more likely to go unnoticed and they tend not to draw attention to themselves. I also agree with another member (sorry…don’t recall name)…who said that that it can’t be assumed that hijabi girl will not listen to music or won’t know how to have fun. That’s the first thought that came to my mind. It’s amazing the changes that can come in a couple with the passing of time. My cousin’s husband was lax with eating nom-halal foods…and now he eats only halal lol. We tend to say that “oh we can’t do this …and hell no…we won’t give up xyz”…but there’s so much merging and compromising that takes place k one might surprise themselves later on, lol. OP, such girls DO indeed exist…I know many of them…and they can be found the world over. As to who one ends up with in the end…shayad kismat ki baat hai.