y is it not allowed for a women to divorce her husband…but a man is allowed to divorce his wife?
edited
[This message has been edited by Sentinel (edited January 02, 2002).]
Women are allowed. Women can leave a man simply because he cannot sexually satisfy him. Thats how much power women have.
Faceup, don't spew out comments like that; its simply not nice.
Jitna Diya Sarkar Nay Mujko, Itni Meri Auqat Nahi, Yeh Saab Tumhara Karam Hai Aqa, Mujh Mein Aisi Koi Baat Nahin.
Love happens once . . .
.
http://www.ourdialogue.com/d16.htm#1
Islam allows the dissolution of marriage at the request of the wife in two ways: a divorce ordered by the judge if she proves that she is being subjected to harm in her marriage and khula’, which does not require any proof.
The latter does not need to have any particular reason to be freed of her marriage bond. Khula’ is a termination of the marriage contract at the woman’s request because she feels that her interests lie elsewhere. Since in Islamic marriage the husband bears more of the cost, the woman is required to refund to her husband all the dower he had paid her at the time of marriage.
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Originally posted by mAd_ScIeNtIsT:
**
the woman is required to refund to her husband all the dower he had paid her at the time of marriage.**
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what do u mean by that
2: 225 Allah will not call you to account for thoughtlessness in your oaths ** but for the intention in your hearts; ** and He is Oft-Forgiving Most Forbearing
Ibrahim says; Greetings of Peace to one and all.
The Poster "allupinmygrill" clearly seems to have one intention, that being he /she wants "all up in his/her grill" as the handle indicates
so I am wondering why should I or anyone be in your grill?
Because your intention to post here is to argue and "grill" or is there more to it?
[quote]
Originally posted by Ibrahim:
**
The Poster "allupinmygrill" clearly seems to have one intention, that being he /she wants "all up in his/her grill" as the handle indicates
so I am wondering why should I or anyone be in your grill?
Because your intention to post here is to argue and "grill" or is there more to it? **
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what?
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Originally posted by allupinmygrill:
**
what?**
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Brother Ibrahim is very clear in his post. The intention of the questioner is best known to Allah.
If your name all up my grill indicates your intention, there is no sense in replying to it as there will be unneccessary arguments instead of a vluable discussion.
Furthermore, people liek Sarah and Faceup, who are only there to create fitna will jump in, as they have. Their comments will only earn them the ire of the Creator, unless they repent.
Rabbeshrah lee sadree; wa yassirlee amree; yafqahoo qaulee.
[This message has been edited by FactFinder (edited January 02, 2002).]
[quote]
Originally posted by allupinmygrill:
what?**
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Ibrahim says; Every closed eye is not sleeping and every open eye is not seeing
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Originally posted by allupinmygrill:
**
what do u mean by that**
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In Islam, upon marriage the husband is expected to pay a sum of money to his bride (agreed to beforehand). This is known as a dowry. If the bride wishes to annul her marriage for any reason, she can either get a court to grant her the divorce (i.e. if she has been ill-treated), in which case she may keep the dowry, or she can simply return the dowry and announce that she wishes her marriage terminated by khula. At this point she is freed from her marriage with no further obligations to her husband.
how the divorce laws affect musilms living
in west dont they have to follow the secular laws of the country.
[quote]
Originally posted by mAd_ScIeNtIsT:
** In Islam, upon marriage the husband is expected to pay a sum of money to his bride (agreed to beforehand). This is known as a dowry. If the bride wishes to annul her marriage for any reason, she can either get a court to grant her the divorce (i.e. if she has been ill-treated), in which case she may keep the dowry, or she can simply return the dowry and announce that she wishes her marriage terminated by khula. At this point she is freed from her marriage with no further obligations to her husband.**
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MadScientist, do u even know what ur talking about. First there is no concept of dowry in Islam .... DUH !!! .. its only mehar, which the husband gives to his wife, and it cannot be paid back whether the marriage is annuled or not.
As for the topic, yes a wife is absolutely allowed to terminate her marriage in Islam.
Its our Wits that make us MEN .... 'Braveheart'
[quote]
Originally posted by LooksCanKill:
** MadScientist, do u even know what ur talking about. First there is no concept of dowry in Islam .... DUH !!! .. its only mehar, which the husband gives to his wife, and it cannot be paid back whether the marriage is annuled or not.
As for the topic, yes a wife is absolutely allowed to terminate her marriage in Islam.
**
[/quote]
The word mehr in English is dowry. A woman can take divorce (known as khula). It is clear in ayah 2:229, relevant portion quoted below.
[quote]
It is not lawful for you, (Men), to take back any of your gifts (from your wives), except when both parties fear that they would be unable to keep the limits ordained by Allah. If ye (judges) do indeed fear that they would be unable to keep the limits ordained by Allah, there is no blame on either of them if she give something for her freedom.
[/quote]
Rabbeshrah lee sadree; wa yassirlee amree; yafqahoo qaulee.
The KHULA Divorce works this way:
1)The wife approaches the husband to DIVORCE her in return for the Dowry that was given the wife.
2)It is upon the husband to grant the wife's wish of a Divorce. He may try to blackmail her by making monetary demands or other demands.
KHULA doesn't mean the Wife is divorcing the husband; she initiates the process and it is still the husband who gets the final say -Divorce.
Most of muslim women would DARE not ask for Khula Divorce because of the stigma attached.
The common form of divorce is still:
1) Verbal Divorce where the husband says TALAQ(divorce) three times;
or,
Says the word talaq on three separate occassions.
i)The husband's obligation (financial support) to the wife CEASES after the Idaat (waiting )period of three months.
ii)After the three months idaat - the husband may not have to support the wife in any way. He may EVICT her or push her out the door.
iii)The children become the custody of the father.
I shall write more about this matter later.
[quote]
Originally posted by faceup:
**The KHULA Divorce works this way:
1)The wife approaches the husband to DIVORCE her in return for the Dowry that was given the wife.
2)It is upon the husband to grant the wife's wish of a Divorce. He may try to blackmail her by making monetary demands or other demands.
KHULA doesn't mean the Wife is divorcing the husband; she initiates the process and it is still the husband who gets the final say -Divorce.
Most of muslim women would DARE not ask for Khula Divorce because of the stigma attached.
The common form of divorce is still:
1) Verbal Divorce where the husband says TALAQ(divorce) three times;
or,
Says the word talaq on three separate occassions.
i)The husband's obligation (financial support) to the wife CEASES after the Idaat (waiting )period of three months.
ii)After the three months idaat - the husband may not have to support the wife in any way. He may EVICT her or push her out the door.
iii)The children become the custody of the father.
I shall write more about this matter later.**
[/quote]
Are you discussing Islam and its concept of khula or what happens in your family?
Rabbeshrah lee sadree; wa yassirlee amree; yafqahoo qaulee.
[quote]
Originally posted by FactFinder:
**
[QUOTE]
Originally posted by LooksCanKill:
** MadScientist, do u even know what ur talking about. First there is no concept of dowry in Islam .... DUH !!! .. its only mehar, which the husband gives to his wife, and it cannot be paid back whether the marriage is annuled or not.
As for the topic, yes a wife is absolutely allowed to terminate her marriage in Islam.
**
[/quote]
The word mehr in English is dowry. A woman can take divorce (known as khula). It is clear in ayah 2:229, relevant portion quoted below.
[quote]
It is not lawful for you, (Men), to take back any of your gifts (from your wives), except when both parties fear that they would be unable to keep the limits ordained by Allah. If ye (judges) do indeed fear that they would be unable to keep the limits ordained by Allah, there is no blame on either of them if she give something for her freedom.
[/quote]
**
[/QUOTE]
Absolutely wrong, mehr is different from dowry ... i cant seem to remember the word for it. Dowry is a cultural tradition and has nothing to do with Islam.
Mehr does not have to be compensated for in case of a divorce (which means that the husband initiates the process). Incase of Khula, the wife has to compensate for the mehr (yet Islam, and most examples set by our prophets, emphasize on being kind and forebearing in this respect). If the wife cannot compensate then its the relatives and community's responsibility to help her. The compensation does not necessarily have to be an exact amount, it can be lesser if agreed upon by both husband and wife.
If the wife does not have the right of Khula mentioned in her marriage contract, it does not ean that she can never obtain a divroce from her husband (however in such a case the husband is assumed to have the default bond of marriage). The wife can still initiate through court proceeding however the hjudge decides the final outcome depending on the situation.
As for the saying talaq 3 times, is really not what most people think ... a husband can say talaq 100 times in anger at one moment but it counts as a single instance, in such a case both husband and wife are still allowed to live with each other and have sexual relations as well but must resolve their differences internally. If the husband repeats it again at another occasion then the wife has to separate from the husband and live with her relatives (family) for a period of one month in which the husband is not allowed to have a relationship with her. If the husband does it the third time, then the wife is separated and the husband has no right to her and she is divorced. The husband cannot re marry her again until she has married and been divorced again by her latter husband. But no deal can be done hear, like someone marry her and then divorce her so she can get remarried with her former husband (this is haram and not permissible).
However the husband can repeat the word talaq and specify the intention of completely divorcing her while saying it 3 times. Then there is no interval periods to make up in between and he cannot re marry her till she has been divorced again by someone else.
Its our Wits that make us MEN .... 'Braveheart'
[This message has been edited by LooksCanKill (edited January 02, 2002).]
Mehr is translated into english as dowry.
Dowry comes in 2 forms - as part of culture, as practiced by hindus, and as part of religion, as practiced by muslims.
[quote]
Originally posted by LooksCanKill:
** Absolutely wrong, mehr is different from dowry ... i cant seem to remember the word for it. Dowry is a cultural tradition and has nothing to do with Islam.**
[/quote]
Evidence. As MadScientist has explained, I believe you are in a place where Hindu custom is predominant.
**
[quote]
Mehr does not have to be compensated for in case of a divorce (which means that the husband initiates the process). Incase of Khula, the wife has to compensate for the mehr (yet Islam, and most examples set by our prophets, emphasize on being kind and forebearing in this respect). If the wife cannot compensate then its the relatives and community's responsibility to help her. The compensation does not necessarily have to be an exact amount, it can be lesser if agreed upon by both husband and wife.**
[/quote]
How is this relevant to what I wrote and you seem to disagree with?
**
[quote]
If the wife does not have the right of Khula mentioned in her marriage contract, it does not ean that she can never obtain a divroce from her husband (however in such a case the husband is assumed to have the default bond of marriage). The wife can still initiate through court proceeding however the hjudge decides the final outcome depending on the situation.**
[/quote]
The nikahnama cannot cancel the right given by Qur'an and Sunnah.
**
[quote]
As for the saying talaq 3 times, is really not what most people think ... a husband can say talaq 100 times in anger at one moment but it counts as a single instance, in such a case both husband and wife are still allowed to live with each other and have sexual relations as well but must resolve their differences internally. If the husband repeats it again at another occasion then the wife has to separate from the husband and live with her relatives (family) for a period of one month in which the husband is not allowed to have a relationship with her. If the husband does it the third time, then the wife is separated and the husband has no right to her and she is divorced. The husband cannot re marry her again until she has married and been divorced again by her latter husband. But no deal can be done hear, like someone marry her and then divorce her so she can get remarried with her former husband (this is haram and not permissible).**
[/quote]
Irrelevant, but thanks for the info. However, there is an error when you say
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If the husband repeats it again at another occasion then the wife has to separate from the husband and live with her relatives (family) for a period of one month in which the husband is not allowed to have a relationship with her.
[/quote]
Even after the second pronouncement, the wife stays in his house and she is still his wife. What is your evidence?
**
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However the husband can repeat the word talaq and specify the intention of completely divorcing her while saying it 3 times. Then there is no interval periods to make up in between and he cannot re marry her till she has been divorced again by someone else.**
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Again irrelevant. What do you mean by
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Then there is no interval periods to make up in between
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No iddah?
Rabbeshrah lee sadree; wa yassirlee amree; yafqahoo qaulee.
[This message has been edited by FactFinder (edited January 02, 2002).]
[This message has been edited by FactFinder (edited January 02, 2002).]
Quote: Lookscankill
As for the saying talaq 3 times, is really not what most people think ... a husband can say talaq 100 times in anger at one moment but it counts as a single instance
I do not know what Koran says about divorce, but I know one famous case, which shook India, The Shah Bano Case. The details of the Case is, One women from Indore, named shah Bano, was divorced by tripple talaq by her husband in one shot and afterwards he threw her out of his house, without any maintenance. This poor women approached the court for maintenance, which was upheld. The decision of the court was challenged and the matter went up to the supreme court, which gave a judgement, ordering payment of compensation or maintenance to Shah Bano. This verdict enraged the Muslim community calling it a intereference in their personal affairs.
That's a old story and ShahBano is now dead. The truth in India (atleast) is that tripple talaq is the most popular form of divorce practised.
Also, there are cases where the husband has pronounced talaq thrice under the influence of alcohol, and the women was separated, due to no fault of hers.
Many educated Muslims are fighting against this rule in India, but to no avail.