Re: disturbed
If I had been there, I would have asked the hosts as to why they were treating her like that or else handed over my own plate to her. I don't believe in keeping mumb on such occasions. This is simply unacceptable at our home.
Few days back, my moms aunt and her son came at our place. Now, once they settled down, I felt as if there was still someone standing outside. Upon inquiry she said its the young guy, their servant( 7-8 yes old). Obviously I could see the small feet through the grill, so I asked him to come inside and told him to either sit in the room/kitchen or balcony. I realised that she was uncomfortable when I also served him tea and whatever was there. Some people simply avoid that 'kay janab sar par char jai ga/gee naukar.'
I believe that if you give them yourselves whatever is available, they will never get into the habit of stealing things. But there are a whole lot of issues attached to that...its about class, its about trust etc...