Re: Distant Relationships
2 months…how does he manage it??? more to the point how do you cope??? ok 2 days but 2 months is testing it…
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lool really? they probbaly not used to each others company or probably not spent much time together…aw dats cute…aj maussam kaisa tha lol 
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such a silly comment its not the case for every single marriage…you should be offering words of comfort.
Re: Distant Relationships
Pyaari and Farah: maybe you should talk to your fiance about the way you feel....that way you both know the situation and try to undertsand each other and they it might help them to care for your feelings and make an effort to ring you inshAllah.
they might not even be doing it on purpose...sometimes i find that when i talk to my hubby i end up feeling mroe depressed and sulky and crappy....sometimes i just get in bed and start crying becoz i miss him so much and cant take us being aprt...so what im saying is that they probably cant take talking to you on the phone coz it depresses them too much...
dont think why should i make the effort and stop calling becoz that distances you even more...it must get frutrating when you feel you are making all the effort but at least you are trying to keep that connection and they will appreciate it :)
Re: Distant Relationships
u might be right… but she was the one who wanted to leave, not me and infact, she thought dat i am gonna beg her “Plz dont leave me, i will die”.. stuff like dat…she wanted to have control on me, wanted me to do wot she wanted me to… u know wot i mean… or maybe she was just flirting… who knows.. there is a crazy world out there..
Re: Distant Relationships
D2A: I have tried sharing my feelings, but I think he doesn't get it or he doesn't understand. No he is not being ignorant or anything I personally think its a cultural difference which is a problem. I think his thinking style is just a little different than mine. I mean he does want to marry me, but distance relationships are hard especially when your starting your relationship with distance. I wanted to become his friend first but its hard to be his friend especially when your doing all the sharing and he isn't. We are both very reserved but I had to bring myself out of that shell and I tried a lot, but he didn't. So I gave up. It hurts to think that we don't talk that much, but then I get kinda angry whenever I know he has the time to contact me but he doesn't. So I just kinda give up. I just try to think of myself single, but not really single. I mean single in the respect that I don't have expectations of him. I don't want to wait around by my computer or by the phone waiting for him to call me.
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Bhoot: are you still together? So do you not talk at all if you are together? How do you deal with it? I mean its like I know this girl who was engaged and didn't talk to her fiance but then she made another friend that was a guy and she seemed more attached to the guy which was bad, but she no longer talks to that guy. I think that distance can break these types of boy girl relationships.
Shoaib: Misunderstandings are so hard to clear esp. with distance. And it could have been that the girl could have been insecure and could have been the reason why she thought you weren't into the relationship. Sometimes its hard for guys to express their feelings and I know girls expect a lot sometimes.
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n u had to open this thread today, the day he left :( :( :( :( :( :( :(
hmmm yea I talk to him alot, everyday and i feel that its important...hmmm i dont think i have gone more than a day without talking to him unless hes like in flight or doesnt have the phone
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long distance relationships mostly fail..as some one in this thread ponited out " out of sight out of mind"...
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^ thats so not true! It just depends on how u handle it, i know that if we lived closer it would be much more better and maybe we wouldnt have had the lil argument thingies we had, but i have seen alot of long distance relationships work..
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that is sooo wrong. I talk to him EVERYDAY, every hour, sleep with him on the phone and everything. He is on my mind 24/7, and I know so I am.
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I agree!
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2 month? damnn 
I go crazy if I don’t hear from him within 2 hours.
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Most men are very different when it comes to expressing themselves and dealing with things the way most women do. I guess most of us (females) expect similar treatment in return. When our expectations are not met we are left with no choice but to assume that they do not care about us.
Re: Distant Relationships
TJ: Sorry your feeling down. Don't worry inshallah everything will work out for the better.
And sorry to all others if this thread makes them feel down. But don't hesitate to share your feelings.
I just feel that it is important to talk everyday, but since mine is not a love engagement and I wish it would be so that way I would have feelings for him before I got married to him...its just too emotional and not enough effort.
For those that have loved and are in a long distance relationship. You know two things are so important, and its funny that I learned this from my marketing class, but commitment and trust. If one of those isn't there the relationship is hard to carry on.
Farah: was yours a love type of thing or just arranged?
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exactly… its not dat easy to clear things up, specially on the phone or distance relationships, as u mentioned… its kinda gets frustating aswell… and sometimes girls fail to understand that if the guy is not saying anything or not expressing or saying wot she wants to hear… it doesn’t mean that he has found some other girl or trying to dumb dis one.. they gotta understand dat its not end of the world. Too much expectations from one or both sides are mostly end up really quickly.
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Pyaari83: Mine was arranged. I think that if it is a love marriage then it is easier to cope being apart in the sense that you know that your fiance and you like each other and actually want to marry each other. But in an arranged marriage you dont have this security.
I know he is busy but how long does it take to sms evey few days? or even once a week or to make a call if he cant come online if he is busy.
Its just that when we dont talk for a long time I just think that maybe he doesnt want to go through with the wedding or maybe he has a relationship with some girl in Pak.
The more I think about the whole situation the madder I get, but then I dont know the full story, maybe he has some mujboori! or problems.
When we did talk we got on really well, we used to just sit and joke with each other on msn and it felt like we had a really good connection with each other, its just this staying in contact business that has messed it up abit.
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D2A: Its different for you, you are actually married to him and you just miss him, this is why you get annoyed and angry, but dont take your frustration out in him, im sure he misses you as much as you miss him.
For me and Pyaari 83, we dont even know if they miss us or actually care about us!
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My mom was in a long distance relationship. Infact, I would say 30% of women in Pakistan are in a long distance relationships, considering so many Pakistanis leave their family to work abroad.
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In my opinion…I think that a westernized Pakistani’s thinking is different than an eastern person’s thinking. When I say western i don’t mean they want to date or anything. I mean personally for me I just want to be friends first and then get married that way I know who I am marrying and know how the person is. But for many girls in PK they marry not knowing who the guy is and base their trust on their parents choice (from what I saw in PK when I went).