I’ve been married a few months and though I love my husband and feel like I made the right decision, it’s been tough. There were a lot of hurt feelings over my in-laws behavior at wedding events (similar to how you’re describing your in laws being MIA for integral parts) and my parents felt like they were disrespected (I did too, tbh). I’ve realized that 1) my in laws just don’t have the tareeka I grew up with 2) my husband is amazing and understanding and because of that I’m slowly learning to live with it. My marriage wasn’t arranged either but I still had no idea at the complete lack of order or manners that my inlaws (MIL in particular) possesses mostly because my husband has always been very organized/well mannered/polite/good with social norms. But you look at the bigger picture. If you’re happy with your husband then it’s all good. The lack of phone calls/communication between our parents used to bother me a lot (I always thought our parents would be friends) but sometimes it’s better that way-- personalities don’t match always and sometimes its better they don’t talk vs talk and hurt each other’s feelings.