I am calling onto parents of gupshup. Those who believe in disciplining children or those who dont. I want to know you methods and techniques especially for tots under two. How do you get them to do what you want or rather at this age group stop doing things that they are (it seems) always doing. Some children develop the habit of whining constantly when they are getting bored. Now you cant give them 100% attention all day long, how do you stop that? Its like urdu thin thin, begins to get on the nerves. I get the feeling that 18mths child understands a no yet it is very hard for me to get them to stop with words. So share you experiences.
Infact those who are not parents but have dealt with young children are most welcome to share.
ur child seem's bored, and i dont really agree with disciplining children tht are bored, infact it could get a whole lot worse, if ur not listening to his needs....
observe ur child and notice what he enjoys doing, give him activities tht interest him and will keep him occupied and stimulated. (if you let me know what he enjoys doing then i could give u ideas/activites to do with him)
on the other hand when Diciplining a two year old, be very 'firm and clear' if they are hitting out at you u tell them "hand's down" "stop" etc.. etc..
the key is to praise good behaviour, and ignore bad behaviour. But it's best if u can try not to let it get to the point of a tantrum in the first place.....
I am calling onto parents of gupshup. Those who believe in disciplining children or those who dont. I want to know you methods and techniques especially for tots under two. How do you get them to do what you want or rather at this age group stop doing things that they are (it seems) always doing. Some children develop the habit of whining constantly when they are getting bored. Now you cant give them 100% attention all day long, how do you stop that? Its like urdu thin thin, begins to get on the nerves. I get the feeling that 18mths child understands a no yet it is very hard for me to get them to stop with words. So share you experiences.
Infact those who are not parents but have dealt with young children are most welcome to share.
consistency is the key when it comes to disciplining a child. A toddler under the age of 2 is just testing the waters...he wants to see how far he can go with doing something that you disapprove of. If you stick with your household rules...he will eventually get it so don't give up on saying NO.
Just keep in mind a child under the age of 2 is not deliberately being disobedient. This is simply a learning process for him...he is learning right from wrong. This is a process that ALL children go through.
I agree with AE...littles need LOTS of consistency and a completely structured day. First, get out of bed. Then its time to eat breakfast. Then time to clean up and get dressed. Then time to ... yadayadayada.... for the whole day. Structure does wonders.
AND....
Structure in itself is a form of discipline. There has been some confusion over this term in the recent past...but all it means is to teach another to adhere to rules.
If you do not adhere to the rules yourself (ok, so you dont want to get up and then eat breakfast today? Ok, so we;ll do it all different just for today...) Thats SO bad to do. Stick to routine, stick to the rules of what is ok and what is not....stick to it like glue. Or pay the price!!!!!!!!!
she likes or loves being read her little books. sometimes when she is generous i suppose she carries on by herself but mostly she wants to be read. she hates it when i am reading a book or her father. is it normal for children not to let you do work sometimes and play on their own? she is a very up and about kid and loves the walks and the play time in the park. the routine setting is usually not an issue. i am talking about things like opening drawers and cupboards again and again and especially when i am tied up in something and get to her immediately. I sometimes feel that she is very attention seeking , she sort of like constantly craves attention.Now a days she has developed a habit of whining while i am busy, which gets to me. she is an only chiuld so she had lots of attention but now because she is growing up i would like her to be a bit more independant in her play time.
popping what ever she can get hold of in her mouth, opening drawers, pulling out clothes, or books or anything inside it. she stops for a while and as soon as she is on her own again does it all over.
Never HIT them for sure. As colorful eyes - said already be firm, be serious, be authoritative. use small words - such as STOP, COME HERE, GO TO BED, NO!, QUIET, etc.
When they listen - give them a small reward - it could be as little as a hug. Just hug them - let them know that they did a good job.
If they misbehave, then TAKE AWAY THEIR FAVORITE toy. Let them know they will get it only if they behave. Give them "Time out" - by having them sit in a "specific time out" chair - away from everyone - in a corner.
time out chair, she will never sit. so there is a time out room.trouble with time out routine is that i worry about leavin her in a room. my husband sends me on a guilt trip that she gets scared, she appears to hate it ,cries her lungs out in 1 minute. but the lights are on and her toys are all over and she is not the least bit interested. it tames her a bit but i worry sometimes if it is such a good idea?
Children at this age are into exploring and have a great interest in the world around them, try filling up some baskets up, in interesting everyday objects suitable for your child’s age, development including pots and pans that some children love, I have used these, when working with the under 3s and find they work great!!
here’s some info, from the net:
**
**What is a Treasure Basket? **
A Treasure Basket (‘invented’ by Eleanor Goldschmied as in her book: ‘People under 3’) is a strong basket (about 30 cm in diameter) filled with about 100 everyday and natural things (no plastic or toys) of different size, shape, feel, weight, smell, taste and sound. It needs to have a rim the height of a mug so it will not tip over when a baby leans on it for support.
under 2's....I think if they have older siblings then it's a lot easier as they can play with them, my 8 months old amuses himself just by looking at his elder brothers playing.
Also, reading chunky and colourful books to under 2's is a good way of keeping them busy, after a while they'll choose a book and start looking at books and pictures themselves (may be when they're old enough to sit without support and crawl).
Basket full of different toys is another good idea, but sometimes i give my little one one toy at a time as he gets bored with all the toys in the basket very quickly and starts throwing them, one toy at a time keeps him busy for longer period .....one toy atleast for 10 minutes.
I believe at this age we have to keep the kid interested and entertained most of the time.
oh and for drawers and cupboards, get those safety catchers then she won't be able to open them.
i suggest leave one cupboard with some intersting items for her to explore.
To be honest i don't remember any major problem occuring with my under 2's.....i'm not boasting or anything, just being honest. i think distract the kid with something when she's crying for something you don't want her to give.
time out chair, she will never sit. so there is a time out room.trouble with time out routine is that i worry about leavin her in a room. my husband sends me on a guilt trip that she gets scared, she appears to hate it ,cries her lungs out in 1 minute. but the lights are on and her toys are all over and she is not the least bit interested. it tames her a bit but i worry sometimes if it is such a good idea?
Giving time out to a child under 2~
i like to call it a thinking/calming down spot, The child should sit there for 1 minute for every year of their life,(e.g. 2 yr old will sit out for 2 minutes).
if a child is having a tantrum and is screaming their head off and u have sat them out and they are still screaming after two minutes, then that child has'nt had time out. The point of time out is to calm down and think about what they have down. so once the child has calmed down then u time the two minutes.
if your child is not understanding time out, then sit with ur child while u give him time out with ur face and body away from him(so u are not giving him any attention) do not speak to him or look at him during this time.
i have sat with children for over 30 minutes with them screaming, just try to block out the screaming, he is just trying to test ur limits.
and another thing always warn a child b4 u sit them out, e.g. if he is throwing things around, ask him to stop if he does it again, remind him u just asked him to stop. Tell him if he does it again then he will sit out (and if he does do it again, then make sure u carry it out and sit him out straight away).
p.s. dont leave him in a room by him self it can be a very terrifying experience for a child to be left alone in a room all by him self. have a quite corner or use the stairs where u can still see him....
popping what ever she can get hold of in her mouth, opening drawers, pulling out clothes, or books or anything inside it. she stops for a while and as soon as she is on her own again does it all over.
i think as shabs mentioned a treasure basket would be perfect, with natural everyday objects inside them e.g.
~ hair brushes
~ Fabrics
~sponges
~ acorns
~ bells
~foil
~empty bottles
~feathers etc.. etc..
children spend hours playing with them, have it all in a small basket, and when ur busy, just take it out and let him play with it....
All the above i have mentioned is part of a child's Heuristic play which is the term used for babies/toddlers/infants play, that actively encourages exploration and discovery. They are dependent on their senses to give them an understanding of the people, places and things that are in their environment.....
By feeling, Seeing, Mouthing and manipulation objects, babies/toddlers begin to collect information that will later lead to identification and naming of objects. Mouths, eyes, ears, and skin are the vehicles babies/toddlers use to learn with....
Mouthing objects is particularly important for babies and toddlers, but it often creates anxieties in adults about hygiene. A babies/toddlers mouth is the most sensitive part of the body. The tongue is teaming with nerve endings and that is why babies are so keen to use their mouths to explore the world. I would suggest regularly washing children's toys to reduce the risk of infection by mouthnig objects....
When collecting objects make sure they are safe for mouthing and can be easily cleaned....
i can give u more ideas if you need to put in the treasure basket......
^sitting with screaming kid for 3o mins.....you must be a very patient person.
Hareem sitting with children screaming for 30 minutes, to children kicking, punching, self harming, biting, throwing things across the room etc... etc... the list goes on...
yes i am a very calm and patient person, why becoz it's never the child's fault....
thank you ladies. treasure basket is a good idea will definitely start that. with the time out routine she is not crying when she goes into the room but as soon as i shut that door she becomes hysterical.havent got any older sibs hareem and to be fair i think she has grown too attached to me and now is the time she needs a bit of learning experience on her own. to top it off she is teething so yeah could be attributed to her irritated attitude. she can be a good kid didnt trouble me before. but kids her need space and we are more than cramped so she gets annoyed when she is told off to stay away from pretty much every thing around her.
