When u were like 12 years old & ur dad taunted u with comments like “Apna kamana aur apna khana, hum tumharay zimmaydaar nahin hain…” with anger & an attitude of dont look @ my wealth coz no1 helped me out, so I aint helpin u out in any way…& da feeling remains 4 a long time.
Does this constitute rude behaviour from parents or is it da 12 yr old kids mistake 2 be alive in this world. What effect does this have on children, & what r da consequences?
We r here 2 obey our parents but do they have some damn responsibility or not. A kid I know has absolutely no sense of direction in his life. He does not know where he is heading, time is never by his side, he lives alone, has no friends around him Xcept me & a few online maks, his parents have never respected his dreams. This kid has alwayz obeyed his parents & has alwayz respected their wishes.
The kid sheds tears almost everyday & has no1 2 listen 2, & he might just end his life 1 day coz his conversation alwayz has death as a topic ingredient.
What can da kid do? Dont recommend - ask da kid 2 speak with his parents, coz they r not going 2 listen & da kid is afraid of talkin with his parents.
His parents are probably doing a pretty bad job parenting, discipline is not the same as being bossy and demandng, and in their quest to try and make him independent, they should not make him feel abandoned.
Sometimes aprents say very rude and demeaning stuff. I once heard this father telling off his 10 year old son in front of a group of men. The kid was unable to locate a small bag in the car. He returned to his dad and told him he was unable to find what he was looking for. The father then said, " Beta, ismay aap ka qasoor nahee hay. Yeh aapka paidaaishi nuqs hay" (translation for Mehnaz: son, it's not your fault. you were born with it).
So, yes sometimes parents do go overboard in the name of "disciplining kids".
How sad, often paretns do this. They want to get the best out of their child and over do it. Often pointing out the mistakes and never focusing on the positive sides. Parents are supposed ot make their children feel wanted and loved, tehy have to make their children feel secure in the family, at home, so they can handle the world outside. this is so sad!
Feed a child fish & u feed him 4 da day, teach da child how 2 fish & u feed him 4 life.
Does life alwayz have 2 be like this? Y arent all of us blessed. Sometimes, it makes me puke & shed a few tears.
Nusrat Fateh Ali sang a very sweet ghazal
"Is duniya kay ghum
jaanay kub hoongay kum"
I 4got 2 mention, that 12 yr ol kid is as old as me now. Hez my good friend, but I dunno how long we live 2gether.
I've never come across cruel parents, Xcept my uncle who used 2 whip his son with a leather belt. Now that kid has grown, but he has totally lost it. He smokes, drinks, bangs, is a rowdy, disrespects every1 including his parents. I've tried 2 talk him out of all of this but he is disgruntled & I mean big time.
I've got my problems which have been unresolved with my parents, & I've tried very hard 2 solve them. But my parents have alwayz turned a deaf ear on moi desires. I alwayz back off, in da fear of da Almighty & da thought that probably I'm asking too much, but after reminiscing my old times, I see that I never enjoyed anything.
Y does life have 2 be so damn cruel? Guppies on gupland know me as a fast living dude, who banged his car @ 200kph & lived 2 die another day. But there is more 2 me than just a few pics with smiles.
Some of u very smart guppies replied 2 this post - Thanks
That reminds me of my Dad always telling us "you think oldie is just talking for noothing, well, jsut wait till you're grown up and have your own kids, then youwill see I was right" a very famous quote of my Dad, lol
And now after all these years, I have to admit, a lot of what he always said was indeed true!
Disciplining a child is different. U alwayz have a right of correcting ur child. But comments like what I wrote & funguys comment - these r harsh comments man. Do u even know how it feels when ur dad says "Apna kamana aur apna khana", "tumhara paydaishi nuks hai".......it hurts.
I get what you mean Mal1k…the thing is no matter how wrong and hurting things they say to you…somehow you always feel kay they are your parents they got every right to say that…sometimes it’s like not kay you can’t fight back or what but you SHOULDN’T be rebellious.
Have heard many hurting things , had negative thoughts but they are our parents and Allah Allah kar kay bool jao…
^^ Lil human, I agree we r humans afterall, but when I look around & see my classmates, who r my age & have been Xtremely rebellious in nature, I see that they r more happier than ppl like me, who NEVER rebelled against our parents :( ALLAH ALLAH kar kay bhool tau gaya hoon, but my past constantly haunts me, no matter what I do 2 4get it. I guess "Apna kamana aur apna khana....", this will be like a deep pain with no remedy in sight.
i reckon parents should not say things to their kids that hurt the kid's feelings or beat the kid ... why keep a small child in emotional stress...bachay par bura asar paray ga...kids need kindness n gentle care...
MALIK i've seen many parents say these types of things to their kids..its sad...its not like the parents dont love their kids, its just they think its for the best for the kid, and sometimes the parents just have strong tempers...but i dont think this is a good thing for a parent to do..
