yapyap. Whatever.
Whatever indeed ;)
Re: Desi Muslim Dating in the West
Bipolar!
Re: Desi Muslim Dating in the West
I am dating my fiance.... I keep on falling more in love every time I talk to him!....
Re: Desi Muslim Dating in the West
Since you seem to know what you're talking about, mind giving us a percentage? Because to me when someone says "extreme" a really high percentage comes to mind, and that is something I just cannot digest. Believe it or not, there are still more shareef loug living in this country then not.
can you give a percentage of how many people are not dating? LOL. this is so ridiculous, obviously there is no survey that goes around asking people if they date or not. and dating has nothing to do with sharafat. shareef people can be in love too you know! just like you think it's dating is very less in pakistan, i seem to think the opposite. whats your source and proof that it doesn't exist? i have lived in pakistan too btw.
give me a PROOF that there is very little dating in pakistan.
Re: Desi Muslim Dating in the West
Muslim Americans have a higher divorce rate o.O?
where did i say they have a higher divorce rate. and secondly no one cares who has a higher divorce rate, this thread is about dating, not divorce. please stop dragging all the nonsense everywhere in every thread. stick to the topic. start another thread for divorce if thats what you want to talk about
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Cite your sources. That is absurd you keep trying to say that Muslim American couples get divorced relatively more than others in society. The American divorce rate stands with Norway at the world's highest. 53%! The most cited Muslim American divorce rate is 33% off of an early and probably unrepresentative (I think less than 60 couples, all south Asian) study in the late 90s at Rutgers.
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i dont need to cite sources, because unlike you, im not going around reporting specific unrelated statistics out of nowhere. secondly, this thread is about dating, thats totally unrelated to divorce. and third, just because someone is married does not mean marriage is successful. plenty of couples are very unhappily married but dont get divorced. whos to judge whether divorce is a bad thing or an unhappy marriage is worse?
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Again bella I think i've been very respectful in my conversations with you, but this idea that all Muslims are somehow bad, abusive without any sort of statistics, maybe justifying your own marriage (I don't judge you for it) with a white Catholic dude, is not a way to address your own insecurities, or bettering dialogue of serious issues within our own community.
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when did i say that ALL Muslims are bad? i made one vague generalized comment in another thread which I take back and realized was wrong. but even then i did not say ALL muslims?? and YOU are the one who generalized Pakistani men as beghairat, but it's okay when you generalize?? please stop bringing my marriage in all the threads, when it has no relations to the topic.
Re: Desi Muslim Dating in the West
can you give a percentage of how many people are not dating? LOL. this is so ridiculous, obviously there is no survey that goes around asking people if they date or not. and dating has nothing to do with sharafat. shareef people can be in love too you know! just like you think it's dating is very less in pakistan, i seem to think the opposite. whats your source and proof that it doesn't exist? i have lived in pakistan too btw. give me a PROOF that there is very little dating in pakistan.
Please point out WHERE I wrote that dating doesn't exist in Pakistan? Read my posts again. I said it does.
Reha claimed it was as much in Pakistan as it is overseas. I don't accept that.
You used the word "extreme", so explain how you know it is extreme. I asked first :p
My opinion is based on currently living here. I know people who are rich/ poor as well as educated/ uneducated. MOST of these people have not dated.
Getting to know a prospect for marriage where family is involved is very different to college students dating (where there no solid plans to marry as their circumstances don't allow it). Being involved in the former is sharafat and the latter, not. In fact it's a sin to be romantically involved with some out of marriage.... So how can any shareef Muslim be involved in this?
And love is not a ditch that you accidentally fall in, it's very much intentional.
Re: Desi Muslim Dating in the West
Please point out WHERE I wrote that dating doesn't exist in Pakistan? Read my posts again. I said it does.
Reha claimed it was as much in Pakistan as it is overseas. I don't accept that.
You used the word "extreme", so explain how you know it is extreme. I asked first :p
My opinion is based on currently living here. I know people who are rich/ poor as well as educated/ uneducated. MOST of these people have not dated.
So your only 'proof' is based on people you know, yet you are demanding statistical proof from me? nice try.. in my opinion, most people that i know in pakistan have been on dates ( i have also lived in pakistan in the past). which one of us has more substantial proof?
just because people you know don't date(or maybe you think they don't date because obviously they are not going to tell you since you seem a bit judgmental, kinda like Maya khan).
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Getting to know a prospect for marriage where family is involved is very different to college students dating (where there no solid plans to marry as their circumstances don't allow it). Being involved in the former is sharafat and the latter, not. In fact it's a sin to be romantically involved with some out of marriage.... So how can any shareef Muslim be involved in this?
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pakistan is clearly is not full of perfect muslims. everyone twists religion to suit their needs, please come down from your moral high horse thinking anyone who dates is not shareef. who are you to judge someones sharafat like that? if someone goes on dates, yet never causes harm to anyone, is not a daaku, doesn't snatch peoples cellphones and jewlery, is he not shareef? you can say hes not a good practicing muslim (which most people aren't anyway, there is tons of other sins people do on daily basis, not just dating).
Re: Desi Muslim Dating in the West
Wasn't the topic desi muslim dating in the west?
Re: Desi Muslim Dating in the West
I have not judged anyone! It's calling a spade a spade. Premarital relationship are a sin. Period. Shareef folks do not indulge in it for fear of sinning/ fear of hurting their folks.
In a country where *some * families would kill their daughters if she were seen just talking to a guy, how do you suppose that there'd be enough girls to brave risking their lives to go out on a date? I don't know why you think Pakistani thinking has "evolved" so much that most people would date. It hasn't.
Re: Desi Muslim Dating in the West
Wasn't the topic desi muslim dating in the west?
Lol
Re: Desi Muslim Dating in the West
I have not judged anyone! It's calling a spade a spade. Premarital relationship are a sin. Period. Shareef folks do not indulge in it for fear of sinning/ fear of hurting their folks.
being nonshareef and nonreligious are two different things. whats shareef to your religious ideology is not the same for someone elses. so anyone who commits any sin is not shareef then, right? that should include any woman that does not wear a hijab, anyone who listens to music, anyone who looks at a female after the first glance, anyone who does not pray 5 times a day, etc... seems like the country is full of nonshareef people then.
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In a country where *some * families would kill their daughters if she were seen just talking to a guy, how do you suppose that there'd be enough girls to brave risking their lives to go out on a date? I don't know why you think Pakistani thinking has "evolved" so much that most people would date. It hasn't.
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there are some animals that would kill their daugthers for that yes, but that still doesn't stop people from dating hence you hear about these vicious 'honor' killings frequently. secondly, these killings dont happen as frequently in major cities. please go to quaid e azam ka mazaar one day and see how many lower/middle class people go their on dates in burqas. richer defence kids go to cafes and restaurants.
Re: Desi Muslim Dating in the West
In a country where some families would kill their daughters if she were seen just talking to a guy, how do you suppose that there'd be enough girls to brave risking their lives to go out on a date? I don't know why you think Pakistani thinking has "evolved" so much that most people would date. It hasn't.
Which pind do you live in? There are many young people including (parday wali shreefa) who date. Some do it openly, some secretly and those shreef log who date will not be bragging about it to every aira ghaira. They would easily fool you with their fake appearances.
Re: Desi Muslim Dating in the West
Personally I think there is nothing wrong with meeting people with the intention of finding a spouse when at the right age/stage of life.
Re: Desi Muslim Dating in the West
hum hain Paksitani hum tu jeeteen gai haan jeeteen gaai
har maindaan main, har tufaan main jeeteen gai
but hey because searches originates from ISLAMIC republic of Pakistan, all is good. Alhamdullilah
and as of original question. Just like any other matter I have seen both extremes in desi datings. Personally, I think there is absolutely nothing wrong in knowing each other but any sane person will know the limits.
as for gora concept of “try before you buy”, they are strange people. you cant try undergarments before you buy but you can try humans… 
Re: Desi Muslim Dating in the West
Please point out WHERE I wrote that dating doesn't exist in Pakistan? Read my posts again. I said it does.
*Reha claimed it was as much in Pakistan as it is overseas. I don't accept that. * You used the word "extreme", so explain how you know it is extreme. I asked first :p
My opinion is based on currently living here. I know people who are rich/ poor as well as educated/ uneducated. MOST of these people have not dated.
Getting to know a prospect for marriage where family is involved is very different to college students dating (where there no solid plans to marry as their circumstances don't allow it). Being involved in the former is sharafat and the latter, not. In fact it's a sin to be romantically involved with some out of marriage.... So how can any shareef Muslim be involved in this?
And love is not a ditch that you accidentally fall in, it's very much intentional.
Sadly, it is.
Re: Desi Muslim Dating in the West
Queer, damn you and your hacking of pakistani browsers… 
Re: Desi Muslim Dating in the West
Sadly, it is.
Not it's not. Not in the Pakistan I grew up in.
Re: Desi Muslim Dating in the West
I think what some of the posters here are trying to say is that dating in Pakistan has become more common than it was in previous decades, not that it is extremely common or as common as it is in western countries. Frankly, no one can say with any amount of certainty exactly how much more common as people in Pakistan are probably not terribly keen to discuss such personal aspects of their lives with others as many people still view dating as taboo and not something they would want others to know about. If people do date, I doubt they are posting it all over their social media and telling all and sundry about their dating experiences.
As far as the comments stating "well, that is not how it was when I was in Pakistan..," I think people should take into account that social behaviours can change rather quickly and can be influenced by a variety of things, so just because dating wasn't common when you lived in Pakistan, it doesn't mean that it isn't more common now. And yes, things can and often do change in a matter of years. For example, I've noticed that adolescents seem to be doing more "adult" things these days and have seen 14-year-olds do things these days that I was not doing and were not common when I was 14 and that was only 10 years ago.
**Disclaimer: I've never been to Pakistan and am not asserting that what I have commented here is a proven fact. It is simply my opinion, so I would kindly appreciate not being tarred and feathered (as seems to have become common on this thread).
Re: Desi Muslim Dating in the West
Not it's not. Not in the Pakistan I grew up in.
It is...do people marry blindly in Pakistan? Do they not meet or talk? Do they not communicate in any way, shape or form?
They do.
That is dating.
I don't understand why the Western concept of dating is always equated with sex while the Pakistani version is all paak saaf.
Re: Desi Muslim Dating in the West
Oh yeah, everyone living in the west for decades, visiting pakistan for few days after every few years (at most) seeing a limited set of people is expert on the intricacies of pakistani 'dating' scene...