i kinda agree, in principle ur right, but i dot think asking for salt is considered picking at cooking skills... i mean its simple, its all a matter of taste (literally), jho mujhe mirchi lagaye gi, u might find it quite bland. So basic seasonings i wudnt consider an insult...
I would tend to agree with you. But looking at Sara's response and many other responses looks like in desi culture it is OK to ask for salt.
Let say if I invite my friends for dinner so it is my duty to check the meal before serving .. isn’t it ?
I mean if you have cooked it , you definitely know if you are high or low on something ..
If you are low , lets say on salt for example , you must provide it on table or make sure to ask you guests if they require any assistance .
After all you are the host .
I personally check every dish before serving it to my guests . In past I have worked as a chef so may be I still consider them as my customers .
It really depends on person’s nature and how close your relationship towards your friend is because I only allow very few friends to touch my kitchen and sometimes I feel uncomfortable if someone is sneeking in my house.
PS DESI MISS MANNERS QUESTION
How do you like it if some lady and her kids start touching everything in your house and start looking at your cabinets just to look how neat or dirty are you? What would you do at this kind of situation?
Next time you go to their home , slide your finger across the top of their fridge which is most of the time last thing anybody will wipe the dust off , of. Then show that dirt laced finger to them.
You will surely loose them as your friends.
On a serious note. We being desi have something called murawwat , lihaz etc etc. English translation of these words would be being sensitive to other people’s feelings . If one is insensitive then we keep our cool and ignore idiotic behaviors and go on with our lives, if this idiotic behavior is not harming your in any way other than giving you some grief.
Hmm good Q. I guess for some they would appreciate help, but for others maybe clearing up and cleaning up in the kitchen is their way to relax for a bit??? I can see how this can be a “bonding” situation for women (if the husbands are friends), or for friends to catch up and chat (if they are friends and their husbands are not).
So maybe thats why u feel the way you do…me just an amateur
i think having a salt and pepper shd just be a given on any table.
Asking for soda or water is perfectly in order, but any flavor enhancers may be considered rudish, not exactly rude.
But there are many people who feel that if a guests asks for stuff, they are in fact considering them to be "close" so they actualy feel good about it.
i agree with you dear but kisi kay ghar ma ja kay agar enhancer mannga jai tu achee baat nahi hai. phir depend karta hai keh kiss kissam ka enhancer aap ko chaihiyay
Wow Mirch, again another ‘stole my heart’ thread! Indeed such valid frustrations u’ve pointed out. My humble two anays worth is, dude they invited u to enjoy the few moments at their house, so ask away for salt… Just say,“Hai I’m so superstitious, so I need to sprinkle some over my shoulders to cast the evil spirits away that tagged along with me on my way to this wonderful dinner” Suggest them the same
I don’t think its rude, but I think its rather doped, that they don’t have shakers/pepper mils on hand esp’ on table. Next time gift them (bought off from clearance stock a’course, wrapped in recycled wrapping paper)
And yes, I hate my kitchen area being invaded by guessts, or my gadgets, appliances and other mechanic touched. I’m so possessive on my henckle’s spat face and Yes, after their departure its a total ‘scrub down, disinfect all’ rampage over the house. Call it freakish vat evaaa…. shrugs like omg, some kids stick boogers in the most bizare places (k, didn’t happened at my place but at a friend’s, I mostly stay clear of kids gala saf karing)
On a side note: Stick to ppl that u truly enjoy being around with. Unless its some mathlab related dinner, its best to rid oneself of such pur-takalof-mizaj friends. In this busy life, such company just adds more stress to one’s already full plate
Thanks for your appreciation of the thread.
LOL about warding off evils.
Now if I start doing that pretty soon aunties will ask me a taweez for good rishta for their boys and girls. Othe aunties will ask taweez to tame their wild husbands etc etc.
Trust me on that one all the deisies have very cute salt and pepper shakers but many of them do not want to keep them at the dinner table or food serving area during a party. I do not know the reasob behind this wierdness.
Desi kids are so lazy because they are so much pampered by their parents. I have found chewing/bubble gum and yes boogers too stuck at wierdest places.
I cannot discreminate when it comes to accepting dawaats at peoples places. I do not want to be labbled a snob. Yes I have some very close and intimate friends but this life demands that you have varying levels of friendships and acquintanceships with other humans.
and start looking at your cabinets just to look how neat or dirty are you? What would you do at this kind of situation?
(bought off from clearance stock a’course, wrapped in recycled wrapping paper)
