Re: Describe your Dowry
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That bride's side do not give any dowry but want large sums as Mehr.
Is it fair?
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The mehr is a gift from the groom to the bride (to the bride, not the bride's family!). She is allowed to ask what she likes for it. But we know from hadith that the best mehr is the one that is easy for the groom to pay. What you ask should vary according to what the groom is able to afford. For some paying $1,000 would be difficult and yet for others paying $50,000 would be easy. So brides should be reasonable in what they ask and expect and should consider their husband's financial situation. Also the mehr should not be seen as an insurance policy to protect against divorce. Many people put huge amounts for mehr because they think the guy will not divorce the girl if he knows he has to pay this amount! This is a joke. Mehr is not to just be paid at time of divorce. Husband should pay it to his wife as soon as they get married, or if she agrees, at a later time. Its her money and once they are married she has every right to get and use it. He should not forget about it and hope she will forget about it, nor should he try to pressure her to "forgive" it on the wedding night. Unfortunately these are all things that are common in desi communities