Hi everyone! Just wanted to get your thoughts and experiences on who you would be comfortable having in the delivery/labor room with you.
A family friend requested me to let her son (a med student) be there for my delivery so he gets some extra practice I’m definitely not letting this guy in.. med student or not, it just feels too awkward! The only non-hospital person I want there is my husband.
What were you comfortable with? Also, how did you deal with people who just assumed they’d get to be there? Did you have to tell anyone to get out?
1st delivery, I had my mom and husband…I dilated and delivered so fast mom just happened to be there since my hospital had the birthing suites where you labor-deliver-recover-stay all in one room.
2nd delivery (the twins), husband only…mom was watching my toddler and came after I was taken to recovery (I had an emergency csection and a vaginal delivery)—no one else could have been there even if I had wanted lol
Like with most other things it’s a personal choice, but yea, I wouldn’t really want anyone other than my husband around.
I had a request from.med student to let him in the delivery room too. He requested when I was admitted… He wasn’t a relative though. Just a gora med student. I let him stay and watch. Other than that husband and nurses. Because using forceps isn’t that common now even they had to use one on my delivery, they made sure all the students/nurses got a chance to see it…
Personally I would feel uncomfortable having a relative other than hubs there. If the student wasn’t someone you knew I would let them see… Now in your case, I probably wouldn’t.
^ I’d be ok with an unknown med student being there. But the fact that i know this guy will make any future interactions with him just way too awkward.
Khatti - that request is weird, riiight? I was so shocked I didn’t know what to say, but this auntie keeps dropping not-so-subtle hints all the time.
It’s an awkward request given it’s from a family friend and it’s even odder that his mommy is making it lol. He’s a fully grown man/med student, right? Couldn’t he approach you himself or through your hospital? Weirdo.
I had hubby and mom during labour. Mom would voluntarily leave during the internal exams for which I was grateful. I didn’t have students but I did have the nurses (obvs), the OB and he brought his resident too. I ended up having an emergency C sec, and that was just me and hubby plus about 10 other medical staff.
Ummm yea it’s weird lol!!! Just tell her that you’re not comfortable with the idea and maybe he can arrange with his school/hospital to observe a delivery of a stranger, it would be less awkward for you both. Be firm!
Omg, how mortifying lol..can you imagine running into him at dawat after he’s watched you poop during delivery
Thanks to me ending up in my hubby’s hospital where a GYN resident examined me, and a VERY close friends of ours being a GYN surgeon at the hospital where I had my surgery…..unfortunately I’m way too familiar with seeing MULTIPLE people (men & women) who have seen me naked. :hinna: (Our friend was not involved in my care b/c I had a great surgeon who knew it would be awkward for me but several his residents/nurses did and I’ve seen them at social events several times since then!). No matter how professional they are….it still makes me cringe.
No personal experience but a close friend of mine schedule to deliver on October is having this issue. Her MIL expects to be in the delivery room! For the sake of not causing drama, right now all she does is smile/nod when MIL brings it up & changes the topic. I think the first time she made a comment about how she doesn’t know the hospital policy and will leave it up to her doctor (total lie btw lol).
In the U.S., all you have to do is tell the nurses who you want in the room with you and who you don’t want. THEY will be happy to kick everyone else out/keep people from entering the room on your behalf.
My MIL is here too, but thankfully she is not assuming/insisting on being in the delivery room. I don’t mind her being in the room during the initial contractions, but for any internal exams or during active pushing - no way!!
This time it’s an elective C for me so I’ve told hubby people will be told the surgery is an hour later than it is in the morning and no one will be allowed to see us until 2pm. I need to be able to recover and sit up and be alert for my Bachha otherwise he’s gonna be upset seeing me groggy and out of it and I want to take our time with introducing him to his new sibling inshallah. Then everyone else ie both sets of grandparents plus Mamoo and wife are welcome to join us.
First time around they were all there as soon as I came out of the OR and I was so dazed and confused. I really didn’t like that experience.
I had my doulas and husband both times and the first time I had my mom too. I did not have my mom during internal exams or while pushing. As for the friend’s son, tell the mom that the medical school he is attending will make sure he attends the required number of deliveries before he graduates. That is the oddest request I have ever heard. And yes, no to the MIL too, will wonders never cease? I might be ok with my MIL being there during labor but not during internal exams or delivery time.
Only husband. Not even mum - she’s been there with me to emergency few times when hubby couldn’t make it, but always voluntarily left the room whenever they decide to do an internal. One time they started asking me questions, and my mum got up and made an excuse to leave… luckily as soon as she left the very next question was when the last time I had sex was - awkwaaaaaaard!
^ That’s really understanding of her! I wasn’t comfortable going with my mom for routine antenatal appointments either.. I don’t think I could have asked any “intimate” questions to the Dr with anyone other than my husband being there :hinna:
Only my husband was with me, my hospital only lets 1 person in with you in the delivery suite. Wouldn’t have bin comfortable having mum and hubby there together.
And they are also strict with visiting times and only 2 people at a time. Also I requested only female midwifes and doctor and males only if an emergency.
I’m definitely not letting this guy in.. med student or not, it just feels too awkward! The only non-hospital person I want there is my husband.
For the sake of not causing drama, right now all she does is smile/nod when MIL brings it up & changes the topic. I think the first time she made a comment about how she doesn’t know the hospital policy and will leave it up to her doctor (total lie btw lol).