dealing with muslim women marrying non-muslims

[emaanW]

@hareem01

Because I wouldn’t feel comfortable around her. And by not keeping a relation I meant I wouldn’t make her my best friend, but I can say hello to her and smile at her when I see her.
If you marry a non-muslim and also you wear a hijab and your husband don’t drink then I think i wouldn’t mind meeting you. Happy?
And most of all, if YOU want to be my best friend without forcing your ideas on me then why not, I’d be your friend.

Won’t feel comfortable around me? i hope you also feel uncomfortable with that full on darth vader who spoke of butchering Lars Vilk!
i dont think anybody forces their ideas on someone else when they are just friends. it’s an emotional relationship, not a political one. you live your life, i live mine.
it’s the more conservative muslims who like preaching in daily life … others just want to relax and breathe.
but thank you for at least be willing to giving me a smile.

@janab-e-ali

Could you please post a link to this study? I’d like to see sample sizes, methodology, how “being a Muslim” was objectively ascertained, etc. If the numbers you’re giving are indeed accurate, I wonder if it has something to do with the fact that, in like (fairly likely) event of a divorce, in most Western nations the mother will generally retain custody of the children.

To answer your question:

• Physical abuse is never justified, no matter what the reasoning
• As for the “community speaking ill”…the community will speak ill of people for far less than marrying outside the faith. I suppose in an ideal world, no one would gossip about others, but in reality its just a fact of life.
• Personally (and I’m hardly a religious scholar), I don’t think she ceases to be a Muslim as long as she herself still believes in the tenants of the Islamic faith. However, there’s no way around the fact that her marriage is completely invalid from a religious perspective and her children are essentially illegitimate.

search for “the empirical facts of interfaith marriage” … it’s the first result on google.
second. whether “being a muslim” was objectively ascertained … is funny you say that … how do classify the children of a regular pakistan couple? are they muslim enough for you? are you objectively muslim? do you objectively support stoning to death of an adulterous woman, when the adulterous man only gets a 100 lashes for the same crime? its right their in the Bokhari.

@fat_spartan

It depends what kind of relationship we have. Generally speaking, I would tend to limit interaction with them.

Islamically speaking, what she’s doing is quite wrong. Adultery is a major sin. I can understand the parents being upset about it though I don’t say that it justifies abuse. As janab-e-ali said, people speak ill of others for less than that.

I can’t say that she’s no longer Muslim for it, but I can understand people cutting off relationships over it.

you think is adultery because in your view it’s not a marriage. in this very forum people are talking about scholars giving the permission to let men smoke because they dont want to “bear the sin” of making haram something that is not. what kind of hypocrisy is that? sure a majority of scholars stand on the side that it isnt allowed. but more scholars are popping up on the scene. there are 3 already! people forget that they are nothing but human! and very prone to making mistakes, even when a majority. and God recognizes that.
and saying that you understand that people can cut relationships over is sad. because you shuld rathe be saying you dont understand the society for behaving like this, and instead being more inclusive.

@soundarya

I wouldn’t avoid her or not be friends with her. If I can be friends with people who date or drink, why should I not be friends with her? Parents on the other hand feel more responsible for religious upbringing. They will naturally be more hurt by the daughter’s actions. And the community… well, they talk and that’s their job.

thank you. you can check the report out yourself and see if they were teenage crushes. if a mother is raising muslim kids, then that means that she is consciously aware of religious implications and mature enough to make choices. why the kids werent muslim in case of a muslim father is the more alarming fact in this study than anything else.

@janab-e-ali

if believing in one God and the Day of Judgment is all you need to believe, then why do we even need the Prophet Mohammed and Islam?

Personally I believe that according to Islam, righteous Christians/Jews/Zoroastrians all will be rewarded for their good deeds, but there still is a very clear distinction between them and believers/Muslims.

Again, the Quran specifically makes an exception for Muslim men marrying women from the people of the book:

technically, when you make your shahada, believing in one God and the day of judgement and prophet Mohammad, is the only testimony you need to be making. the prophet didnt come to teach about one God. the concept has been there since the beginning of mankind. all the prophets came to nations that were in some sort of turmoil and social blasphemy of whatever. and their intention was to introduce the law of God. to ascertain the laws before him, and to implicate any changes or new rules.

and exactly Quran talks about a man marry a non muslim explicitly, but not of a woman marrying a non-muslim. why should this silence be taken as a rule that it is not allowed? it can also be determined that it is allowed, but not openly encouraged?

@fatimah87

Marry who will keep you happy and likewise you to your partner for a lifetime, will be a good and stable father figure to your children. As for the rest it doesn’t matter in my opinion. We make our own lives and will be questioned by only one. You shouldn’t have to justify yourself to anyone else.

One of my aunts sibling’s have all married non muslims and have long and happy marriages, as have the rest of my family who enjoy the same with muslim partners. Find the right life partner and enjoy a long and happy future. You don’t have to justify this to any individual.

i wish people were more accomodating and understanding like you and your family, and less into ex-communicating and honor-killings and domestic abuse.

@Sara516

You did this all while being married?

married! ha. i wouldnt let my toenails get married to that jerk! the guy was an international student. he was having some issues with staying in his university accomodations over the holidays and dad happily invited him over! the king-freak of double standards!

@farrah

i was watchin this youtube thingy last night. the scholar (??) was saying that we should not discriminate against those who in our view do not follow the islamic way. like gays etc. just becuz they are gay, doesnt make them non-muslims, and we should not label them as such. but, if that gay was to be goin around parading and promoting gayism, then that is wrong.
but then again. some scholars even deny muslim men to marry non-muslim women. magr wo to baaz nahi atay. aur unka kuch jata b nahi.

dont we like to be puritans! yeah .. throw everyone out. the gays, the apostates, the ones with dirty nails, the ones with dark skin .. blablabla .. when you pester the gays, are harsh towards them, call for their public stoning as dear anjem choudary would like to do under the sharia in britain .. what do you think the gays are gonna do? give themselves anaesthesia shots and hand themselves over to that freak? what do you mean by promoting gayism? they ask to be accepted as human beings!
and you’re right. men go around willy-wallying as they please, but it’s always the women who get the chop!

@goodnews

Han aur kitney saudion ne apney Haram main Russain Tawifi/ jinhin woh kaneezain kehty hin rakhi hoi hain kabhi in per bhi yeh roshni dalin tu acha hu ga

oh gawwwwwwwwd … i dont know if i can upload this vdo iv got about this. it’s pisses me off so much. men need to seriously get off their high horse of hypocrisy! that arab was throwing a table full of money on this prostitute … and putting a couple down her cleavage … !!!

but anyways … i got an email 2 days ago from my cousin (we were best friends). a full on lecture about God and how i am deviated, and an invitation to become Muslim again rolls eyes … how the absence of a non-muslim makes no difference in the life of a musim family. nobody talks about me in my home and they seem happy. but she didnt expect me to have gone for so long. and wants me to consider coming back, apologizing and the whole drama! riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight. doesnt that make me feel on cloud 9!