dealing with muslim women marrying non-muslims

First of all, I support a muslim woman’s right to marry a non-muslim man (christian, jew).

what my issue is, i have come across several instances of muslims supporting it as well and also those who do dont accept such a marriage personally, but also say that they arent a 100% convinced of the impermissibility either. on my blog i created a little poll, and it clearly shows how men largely are against this. 50 percent of the male vote is against it, and 50 percent for it. while 90% of the women are for it, and 10 percent against it.

i find the reasoning against such a marriage so ludicrous. non of it makes sense to me. why are we so hesitant to reinterpret the Quran? they always end up quoting one mullah or the other … why cant he be wrong? why isnt there a possibility that he has become situationally irrelevant? why arent there female scholars? why is a woman so useless? or at least made to feel?

for personal reasons and issues, it has become impossible for me to choose from amongst the muslim lot. and those of you who might say, well, fix your issues. try switching your life for mine! one could say that my stance is based upon my circumstances, and carries no weight. doesnt everybody live life and make decisions based upon that?

i also know that there is a general ideology that claims even muslim men arent allowed to marry non-muslims, considering the times we live in, and in reference to living in the west, blabla … what i want to ask is. why do i, as a woman, have to face such hardships, be cut off from family, and have everybody go all judgmental on me if i choose to marry a non-muslim, while a muslim man marrying a non-muslim is ultimately alright?

only now do i hear about 2 imams that are willing to carry out the official religious marriage between a muslim woman and a non-muslim man, while for the other way around, it’s absolutely no problem?

why is God going to punish me for not being able to find happiness with a muslim man (i’ve only found misery there, this world isnt perfect … maybe you have found luck with it, i havent, so should i kill my needs?) ..

Re: dealing with muslim women marrying non-muslims

i have the same questions with alcohol..
why are mullahs getting between me and my mojito :(

Re: dealing with muslim women marrying non-muslims

seriously.

Re: dealing with muslim women marrying non-muslims

after all, if its about addiction then nicotine is addictive too and no one has outlawed sheesha, and if it is about intoxication, I can always stop at a mild buzz..

Re: dealing with muslim women marrying non-muslims

only that the coca-cola you're apparently sick of, doesn't already **** you up that you need to go to alcohol.

Re: dealing with muslim women marrying non-muslims

Live and let live.

Re: dealing with muslim women marrying non-muslims

^ so how should i push that in my parents head? their attitude has forced me out. we dont gel.

Re: dealing with muslim women marrying non-muslims

Muslim Men are allowed to marry Chris/Jews and Women not. It's not a decision of man or mullah - it's came from God and it's very clear.

If you don't care about God word's then why do you give a shyt about being cut off from family/relative's .. go live your live accordingly - but don't come her and cry about changing God Made laws - having different interpretation is fine but crying about WHY GOD DID THIS is just wrong !..

i hope you get the point... now can i proceed to finish my glass of wine ...

we have such common problems.. :(

Did this happen BEFORE or AFTER you ran into those personal issues :aq:

Re: dealing with muslim women marrying non-muslims

hmmm

Re: dealing with muslim women marrying non-muslims

@firenze oh yea? how come i dont see the words in the Quran? how come some mullahs are still hesitant in 100% supporting there verdict against a muslim women marrying a non-muslim? how come there are so many voices erupting FOR it. how come so many people are interested in it. how come, this largely woman's issue, is generally negated by men? i reckon you dont know much over the subject and just came along to write something that would sound more like "look at me ... i'm a man" ...flat

@james_bhand i was never against it before, but the reasons and issues led to a proper support.

Why dont you just read upon it and decide for yourself? Anyway nothings to say your relationship will work out in the long run. You might have problems in the future. Love today and not tomorrow.

I do feel sorry for you being in such a situation but I dont think God will banish you from heaven for this act alone. I personally dont like the idea of muslim women marrying out but I live in the west and theres a good chance it can happen to someone in my family in the future. It has not happened yet and i hope it never happens but its a risk a Muslim has to accept that can happen when living as a minority.

Regardless of the polls you conduct and what you and others feel you cant change the word of God ie the Quran. If something is forbidden in it then theres no other way.

Do you pray 5 times a day? Youd probably be actualy committing bigger sins by not praying 5 tyimes a day that marrying out.

Re: dealing with muslim women marrying non-muslims

what a nice post thejoke

Re: dealing with muslim women marrying non-muslims

Peace emaanW

It may be quite a serious issue you have however, there are some things that you aught to know.

It is strange to want to marry a non-Muslim man yet try to find an Imam to read your nikkah. The reason being that in Islam there are clear places where the ruling is present for such marriages being impermissible, however there is no place or at least none that I have seen that requires you to go to an Imam for nikkah!

One custom is being adhered to whilst the other is not, but the level of adherence is opposite to the strength of the ruling.

The reason for you to want to marry a non-Muslim is probably on a number of factors. This may be because the Muslim men you know aren't as good in those factors, i.e. looks, character, money, etc.

If he is very nice, and it seems that you are on talking terms so invite him to Islam and see what happens. Can he believe that God is 1 and Muhammad (SAW) is the final messenger?

i dont pollute my mojitos with that abomination called coca cola.
:nono:

oh shush, u seem more like an apple martini type :D

no one needs your support so keep it to yourself.

we are blessed with a brain ourselves, and we can also read Quran ourselves. we dont need you to guide us what is good for us and what is not. so save this charity work for your daughter.

ALLAH SWT's order are enough for us.

OP:

You don't need opinion from a forum. If you believe in God ask yourself would circumstances justify your act when you will be questioned. Isn't that the test of 'dunya'?

Cant we all just respect each others opinions and respond with respect, and if thats not possible then not respond at all? And please dont go to extends of DAUGHTERS! we would all wish the best for our children you really need to watch how you speak to another person and what you say, you arent any superior then another one.

Anywho, Ms. Emaan, it really is your iman that will speak for you. As of what I have heard, marrying a jew or chris or any ehle-qitab for a women is not forbidden but disliked. The reasons are valid too you just need to do a little more research. But then again its your life, your the one whose going to live it and you have every right to happiness. Following Islamic laws isnt the only requirement to be a good muslim, you have to be a good person a good human you acts are what counts. So dont let yourself be forced by people and the traditions and what not. Its between you and your God.