Have you ever gone to a wedding and felt like you were surrounded by similar looking people with slightly odd features? Chances are you stumbled into a wedding where most of the khandaan is related to each other through both their mother and father. i.e. through *consanguineous marriage
Marrying your first cousin carries an increased of having children with some kind of genetic defect compared to not marrying your first cousin and also of miscarriage. Now this risk is admittedly small around the 2% figure, and some couples will take that risk if they have found their perfect partner which is fair enough.
BUT what if your parents were cousins too, and your grandparents, nanke, great grandparents etc. If you have a family tree/bush where there’s been a number of cousin marriages then that means if you marry your first cousin you carry a massive risk of having a child with genetic defects.
Yet still in the UK I see loads of Pakistanis marrying their cousins, despite a family history of genetic defects they continue to marry their cousins and inevitabley have a child with the same defect. What’s the reason behind marrying cousins despite the risks?
As a medical student I often get asked this question by non-Pakistanis and find it hard to defend as I have no idea why certain groups of Pakistanis (mainly mirpuris in the UK) are obsessed with their cousins…
I'm surrounded by them, that what it is with me and mirpuris. Nah they're nice people with some unfortunate habits...
lol yeah its hard not to notice mirpuris living in England.
As for cousin marriages, as someone mentioned the family drama just isn't worth it. Then there are cousins you're a little too familiar with and would never consider marrying. Medical issues can be very serious which people tend to overlook. My uncle's daughters are married to their aunt's sons, one's firstborn was autistic+some other medical problem, died in his first year. The other daughter has had a miscarriage and lost her second child last month to some birth defect related to bone marrow. Definitely something to think about for those who like to keep it in the family.
Oh this happens in my family, three of my cousins are married within the family and there are plans for others too !!! Fortunately my parents aren't up for the idea =)
But why did they marry in the family? Surely they would want fresh genes in the family and want to prevent the kids from having genetic defects or just looking weird...
They have sooooo many reasons to give eg. its hard to find good and compatible rishtas nowadays, the girl is familiar with the boy and the family, the boys grew up before them so they know how they behave/act etc.
And they know about the genetic problems and all but apparently its easier for them to have defects in the children than to find for rishtas outside the family! :hinna:
because they dont' place much importance in science/education? or they believe that Allah will take care of everything?...so if a child with a genetic defect is born, it was meant to happen....
One generation of cousin marriages is fine, its the constant ones generation after generation thats just......not wise.
well.....other than marriage in relatives.....there is this diseaase called 'thalesemia (i don't know the correct spelling).........if you do a simple blood test of husband-wife.......you can know beforehand whether the kid will be susceptible to it or not......
now tell me how many people you know (pakistan,abroad,educated,uneducated,desi,burger) who have done that test/screening of blood??
because they dont' place much importance in science/education? or they believe that Allah will take care of everything?...so if a child with a genetic defect is born, it was meant to happen.... One generation of cousin marriages is fine, its the constant ones generation after generation thats just......not wise.
Exactly, one generation you carry a slightly higher risk but an acceptable one but several generations of consanguinuity carries an unacceptable risk.
The thing is I've seen families who have been told in very clear terms that if they marry a first cousin, the likelihood of their child having a certain kind of liver or mitchondrial defect is almost certain, but they still go away and marry their first cousin and the inevtiable occurs, so you can't say they were ignorant.
Saying Allah(swt) will take care of it is like walking into a river full of pirhana's and saying Allah(swt) will take care of you, it's non sensical...
well.....other than marriage in relatives.....there is this diseaase called 'thalesemia (i don't know the correct spelling).........if you do a simple blood test of husband-wife.......you can know beforehand whether the kid will be susceptible to it or not......
now tell me how many people you know (pakistan,abroad,educated,uneducated,desi,burger) who have done that test/screening of blood??
That is another problem, where one of the two feels offended at being asked to take blood test to ensure compatibility.
because they dont' place much importance in science/education? or they believe that Allah will take care of everything?...so if a child with a genetic defect is born, it was meant to happen....
One generation of cousin marriages is fine, its the constant ones generation after generation thats just......not wise.
I agree with this.
Hey,
as a med student you will know that we share 12.5% of our genes with our first cousins. In theory, as long as there havn't been a lot of consangious marriages in the family (like you have mentioned nanke & dadke) then from my understanding, the chance of genetic defects in children of cousins is not that much greater than in the general population. However, if there have been lots of inter-marriages then you are sort of taking quite a significant risk.
In my opinion it is about striking a balance between the reasons Hadeel has mentioned with the potential scientific risks of genetic abnormalities, as both are quite important. Unfortunately, many people either don't know or don't believe the risks, so don't account for them.
That's what i said in my first post, if this is the first consanguinous marriage in the family then your risk is around 2% higher than the general population. But this massively increases if cousin marriages have been ongoing in the previous generations...
sorry accidently edited out the other bit of my post...
^ Because ppl will feel that you dont’ have faith in Allah swt and you should be happy with whatever you have (whether its a healthy child or not).
it could also be that talking about children before marriage implies sex and sex is the root of all evil in this world and no girl should EVER know about sex before her wedding night
I don't see why people would be offended by asking for blood tests, both spouses would have to have them, and they could test for Hep C while they're at it another massive health problem in Pakistanis...
But to be honest, common sense says you shouldn't marry your first cousin if previous generations have, your just asking for a defect, and especially if you have a family history of genetic disorders...
Oh and the counterargument is, non-cousin marriages can also result in children with genetic disorders, so what's the big deal. sab kuch Allah ki marzi hai....
)