Considering CASTE in marriages?

Lifestyle Relationships
21

Re: Considering CASTE in marriages?

how can anyone worry about such trivial nonsense in this day and age? I think two educated people from different castes in Islamabad or any other Pakistani city will have a lot more in common with each other than they would with someone from their caste from their ancestral village...

22

Re: Considering CASTE in marriages?

As much as I don't think caste should be a top priority, in our family it sometimes is the ONLY priority. It's pretty silly tbh and I just wouldn't go for it, youre a muslim then youre a muslim...end of it. Sheesh ¬¬

23

Re: Considering CASTE in marriages?

I think the larger hte pool (ie if u live in Lahore or Karachi etc), the more pickier u are allowd to be.

but the smaller hte pool (living in say Nebraska with 5 other desi families) focusing on caste is simply ridiculous....

24

Re: Considering CASTE in marriages?

Its important in our family and basically in our caste too. I on the other hand find it kinda silly. And the qoute used by people to show that one shouldnt believe in cast system is indeed the same quote which is used by people who wanna justify caste-system.

Oh well

25

Re: Considering CASTE in marriages?

I just wish some parents would understand that sometimes you don't find people in your own cast 'attractive' and differences can sometimes heighten attraction. I'm white and before I was married I mainly dated asian and black guys because theres something attractive about brown skin to me, if id I had been forced to marry and lie with a white man I would probably feel physically sick.
I see some asian couples walking around that look like brother and sister – Yuk
I’ve come the conclusion that for the for a lot of asian parents love, sex and marriage don’t have to go together.

26

i totally agree

27

Re: Considering CASTE in marriages?

Its good to see we are still ****ing dumb enough to think ones blood line or caste actually influences our mental and physical characteristics.

I guess Allah has nothing to do with any of that.

28

Re: Considering CASTE in marriages?

CM, thanda pani piyo aur shaant hojao.

29

Re: Considering CASTE in marriages?

my side no issues no worries my mom is a pathan married to a rajput... i am a confused paki born married to a pathan...

how does all this matter i dunno... my side u have all syeds pathans muhajirs brits, oriental u name it we have it... :D

30

Seems like 'love' is a dirty word in so many Asian families. It's often more about duty and obedience..

I know what u mean about finding differences attractive, I always used to be attracted to mixed-race men (isn't if funny how few asian girls marry black men even if they're Muslim)..

31

caste aint a big issue in our family am looking to marry av seen kashmiri girl but ther folks prefer to marry whithin ther own am a guji from back home, 10 yrs back caste would av been a major part in marriage but now some of the families dont bother about it then agian some do.

i guess caste in marriages will always exists in some families.

32

I've been raised in the US so I dont really understand this caste system. How is it determined? financially? geographically?

Scared of flying
33

Re: Considering CASTE in marriages?

^ It works according to family lineage.. Education etc doesn’t come into it. It’s a way of insecure nobodies to feel pride without having to actually achieve anything.. It comes from Hinduism but those Muslims who do follow it would never admit it..

'Sources indicate that the castes among Muslims developed as the result of close contact with Hindu culture and Hindu converts to Islam. Those who are referred to as Ashrafs are presumed to have a superior status derived from their foreign Arab ancestry, while the Ajlafs are assumed to be converts from Hinduism, and have a lower status.

Religious scholar Yoginder Sikand asserts that the caste system among Muslims was not due to the “influence of Hinduism among a previously ‘pure’, ‘uncontaminated’ Muslim community,” but rather to “the continued impact of Hindu beliefs and customs on the converts who still remained within a largely Hindu cultural universe and retained many of its associated beliefs and practices”.’

Source: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Caste_system_among_South_Asian_Muslims

34

Re: Considering CASTE in marriages?

in my family its a big thing!!! Im memon my dads a different type of memon then my mom. But the rest of my dads brothers all got married to the same type of memon Jetpur memon that is. When i had started getting rishtas..if tehy wernt memon..my dad wount consider it...i know,it sounds mean, but he has his reason. Ofcourse if the guy who proposed had everythign we were looking for but wasnt memon, he would be considered.
The reason y parents and grandparents prefer their "jaat" is because of tradition, language, ect; atleast in memons, i know they all prefer to get their children married into memon families in order to keep the lanuage and traditions going on. There are a million traditions memons have that most people i know dont have. Especially traditions that are done during wedding. Its harder for a girl to get adjusted into a memon family. My fiances bhabi is punjabi and she had told me it was the biggest mission...the need to feel accepted is very impostant in a joint family and she finally has that after years of trying ! She claims, it was a very hard task!