Re: confrontation of lies
you dont know the half of it honey
peole think dada dadi kitna pyaar laad kerte hoin geh but these people dont know the meaning of love and respect
Re: confrontation of lies
^ totally sympathise lovey :(
Some people think that being family gives them the right to treat you like poo and yet still entitles them to 'unconditional love'
Re: confrontation of lies
Some people think that being family gives them the right to treat you like poo and yet still entitles them to 'unconditional love'
EXACTLY
tht is what they want
they want the actions of those kids you see with their hands folded in frnt of them going haan ji haanji all the time
Re: confrontation of lies
^ it really narks me off.
The pain they cause is so unfair and you sound like such a nice person that you take what they say to heart. It's a kind of power trip. I think sometimes as they get older they get more and more bitter and the more horrible the comments get
A particular member of my family was just so cruel all his life and now in his old age he has suddenly mellowed...but the odd comment still strays through and it's still as hurtful as it always was :(
Re: confrontation of lies
^ I wish i could write like you.
Your use of words is so good.
Re: confrontation of lies
its cuz she is edumacated
Re: confrontation of lies
I used to be all about confrontation. I suppose I still use it now, but I try to be more diplomatic about things. But when I know someone has messed with me - I used to really pin them on it and make them feel bad, but all it would do would be to lead to a big fight with pretty much no resolution.
I've sorta learned the best thing that works for me at least, is just turning the face away. In other words, don't let it bother you, and just don't associate with that person anymore. But that means keeping it dry and short when you do see them. A hello if they're lucky. Nothing more. In that way, you don't need to worry about them interfering in your life and messing things up, and you don't need to waste your energy on a futile argument.
You see, when people are misbehaving, they usually are aware of it. What's the point of me fighting with someone to make them see that they're wrong when they already know they're wrong and they're ok with it?
Re: confrontation of lies
Sidz just be straight with ur rishte daar and do as fraudia said, paani sar se oppper hai.and about grand parents thats what we did
If ur dad love his parents he can go in their house and meet them.But ur daada daadi don't need to come to ur house and ur mom don't need to meet them.
THat happened with my chahca he had a big fight with ammi and my eldest sis. she told him that i don't wanna meet u anymore .SInce my chachi is her nand too so my behnoii is meeting her sister but she is not.SOmetimes u have to make a stand.Just don't meet them and don't go to their house. if they blame u for something then shut them up with the things u know about them.I think so u need to do this one time and they will be shut forever.
Be brave and shut their big mouths.
Let me tell u one thing even if i am married but i have a right of way to speak and u know i don't meet my phoopi much and neither my mom but my dad go to their house every day ,its fine with us he cannot leave them so just go their and meet them but don't force us to do that.SO u should ask ur mom politely if dad wants to meet his parents he can go their house and we will not.
Take a stand and since u are elder ur say will be heard.
Re: confrontation of lies
you think they hav thier own house?? and live a few streets away
let me tell you all our meals are 2gether and they only hav to goto the house next door to sleep
there is NO WAY to avoid them!
Re: confrontation of lies
^ Darn it really seems like there's no escape huh?!
Your home should be a place of refuge for you, somewehere you can be comfortable and happy.
In this instance, I really do think the situation needs to be addressed. It's entirely unfair that you are being made to feel this way in your own home on a daily basis...
They can express their opinions in their own home if it really gives them a kick...but your home is your domain and they have no right to disrespect you there.
Re: confrontation of lies
Your use of words is so good.
You talking to me Orphy...?
If you are then nah I'm honestly not that great...but thanks :)
Re: confrontation of lies
i am in no position to do so
and they seem to think that they have everyright to use this home as their own battle ground and allow insults to be said towards members of the family
Hell i cant do anything so what am i talking about 
Re: confrontation of lies
^ Hey hey don't be disheartened lovey...!
Greater battles have been fought and won in this world :)
You need to start taking charge of their 'battleground' and make it yours. For starters, have some confidence in knowing that what they are saying about you is untrue.
I know it's much easier said than done, but each time you make even a small stand against them (even if it's something unrelated to all this slandering) you will gradually gain confidence
And they will gradually come to the realisation that you're not just a mute no-body and will more than willingly express your opinion if you want to.
People start to back off once they realise their 'victim' doesn't appreciate being made a victim
Re: confrontation of lies
Greater battles have been fought and won in this world :)
You need to start taking charge of their 'battleground' and make it yours. For starters, have some confidence in knowing that what they are saying about you is untrue.
I know it's much easier said than done, but each time you make even a small stand against them (even if it's something unrelated to all this slandering) you will gradually gain confidence
And they will gradually come to the realisation that you're not just a mute no-body and will more than willingly express your opinion if you want to.
People start to back off once they realise their 'victim' doesn't appreciate being made a victim
they seem to turn a blind eye to stands made against them
Re: confrontation of lies
^ of course they do :) They're not gonna give up their advantage so easily, just keep chipping away at it and get your siblings on your side too!
When my bros, sis's and I stand together and firm about stuff, all of a sudden these kinds of people realise that it's not just me they have to contend with
Re: confrontation of lies
its gonna take time
i'm 21 brother is 20 and sisters are 15 wonder just how long it will take
Re: confrontation of lies
n e way
i think the topic went slightly off track,
but what would you do if a trusted trusted friend, some one u'v known all your life, does something lies about it and then when u find out, still tries to lie to cover up saying "i didnt want to hurt you"
Re: confrontation of lies
then the only way is to maintain ur friendship but don't trust her anymore.