Hello ladies!
Have you come across female guests who are so decked out that the spotlight is likely to shift from the bride and groom to being between the bride and the overly done guest? If this guest is a family member, thankfully not an elder or an in-law, but rather a cousin…would you say something, like perhaps give a hint? Or would you remain quiet?
Re: Competing with the Bride
you shut your mouth and hope that a random guest will point and laugh at her and she'll get the hint :p
Re: Competing with the Bride
I might think about it for a split second- if that much - but wouldn’t pay much attention to it. If I said something…what would happen? Vo jakay kapray badal lengay kya? 
Dulhan will always be the dulhan…no one can compete with her no matter how hard they try. I wore the simplest outfits on my wedding…but there was no mistaking it that I was the bride and it was my day.
Jalnay bhunnay se kya faida phir? Koi ehsaas e kamtari ka shikar hai…ye uska masla hai. Mera nahin. I am there to have some biryani!
Re: Competing with the Bride
you shut your mouth and hope that a random guest will point and laugh at her and she'll get the hint :p
Despite our falling out, I don't want her to be laughed at. I suspect that a few mutual relatives are encouraging her with the ott look, and I think that's uncool. Or maybe she feels encouraged by them. We used to be close pretty close, but we haven't talked in years. She's naturally very pretty, MA, one of those rare girls that look good even without makeup. But in recent years, she's gone overboard and I'm not the only one baffled by it. There's a chance we may meet as there's an upcoming family wedding. If the topic of clothes comes up or she asks for an opinion, I think I might gently let her know. Maybe with comments like, "I think u look pretty with just the teeka or the bindi sticker, both of them together is too much" etc.
Re: Competing with the Bride
You know, I’m not so sure about this. A couple of months back I attended the wedding of a friend of mine and there was a bit of confusion as to who the bride was on the part of some guests.
My friend’s style is classic and minimalistic (picture a Pakistani Audrey Hepburn), so she did not do the heavy embroidery, loads of jewellery and OTT makeup. Instead, she went with a nude/peach coloured outfit with delicate kaam, smaller jewellery, and soft, natural makeup. In contrast, one of the guests wore a heavily embroidered red outfit, complete with heavy jewellery (including the tikka and the hair accessory often worn by Asian brides which I don’t know the name of), OTT makeup, and the dupatta on her head. Several guests actually thought she was the bride and asked why she wasn’t on the stage. 
Re: Competing with the Bride
I remember attending a wedding where two sisters were encouraged to be so decked out that they had the whole teeka and jhoomar thing even with their hijabs on.
Apparently the family was fishing for rishtay and they were “displaying” their ability to provide for their daughters in this manner.
All that happened was that most people thought they were newly wed brides. 
Re: Competing with the Bride
Platinum-blond hair with black roots showing, teeka, bindi sticker, false eyelashes that looked too dramatic, chalky white face, bold red lip, long dangly earrings, choker necklace, along with several long chains, why why why? I've actually heard her regard people as competition in the past over things like hair and jewelry which is why I wonder if she has a need to capture the limelight. I am all for looking your best on formal events, but don't dress with the intention that everyone should admire you when you are not the focal point of the event. I hope that's not her intention. I know the bride will always be the bride, nobody takes her place, but there should be consideration, let the bride shine. If you're gonna go heavy on the jewelry, go lighter on the makeup. If you're gonna do a bold lip, go easy on the eyes. Don't highlight every part of yourself. And this is a beautiful cousin, by the way, one who doesn't even need makeup and MashaAllah looks more like a college student than a mom. I feel as annoyed with her as I do concerned about her.
Re: Competing with the Bride
That sounds like a slightly less crass way of saying they were “displaying the goods.”
Re: Competing with the Bride
probably someone with a very very misguided sense of “hijab” (aka putting the duputta on the head).
On the other hand, everything else (save for the duputta on the head) sounds like normal wedding guest wear. Just because the bride wants to dress minimally, doesn’t mean guests have to tone themselves down.
Re: Competing with the Bride
OP, if you're not close to her any longer, let it be. Why is it bugging you so much how she dresses when she's clearly totally fine with it as are the people around her that she IS close to? Focus on how you plan to dress and leave well enough alone. She's not your sister or your best friend- it's not your place to comment on her clothing, no matter how well intentioned you feel it would be.
Re: Competing with the Bride
It's a fine and tricky line, or is it? I dunno.
I know some brides take off the dupatta at a later point, but I don't favor that and it's for this very reason. The dupatta will be the one thing that sets bride apart especially if guests are just as decked out as her.
Re: Competing with the Bride
I think the woman in question did mention being a hijabi.
As far as the rest of the outfit being normal wedding guest attire, I’m not terribly certain. I’m not Pakistani so I cannot say for certain but at the Pakistani weddings I have attended, guests typically do not wear a matha patti (I think that’s what the hair accessory is called) and “obviously” bridal jewellery (rather like the type of jewellery worn by Aishwarya in Jodha Akbar) to another person’s wedding, which this woman did.
Used to be Dupaatta and chehray pe sharm o haya. Unfortunately latter is totally gone 
Re: Competing with the Bride
OP, if you're not close to her any longer, let it be. Why is it bugging you so much how she dresses when she's clearly totally fine with it as are the people around her that she IS close to? Focus on how you plan to dress and leave well enough alone. She's not your sister or your best friend- it's not your place to comment on her clothing, no matter how well intentioned you feel it would be.
Agree.. my ex-sil used to love dressing up and going quite ott with her look.. that's just the way she was and that was her business.. it was never my place to tell her how she should dress or look..
Re: Competing with the Bride
I have never seen anyone actually so decked out that they are trying to compete with the bride. I cannot even fathom that some female guests come with the dupatta on their head. Only brides do that! Wow, that is so incredibly tacky and ridiculous.
Re: Competing with the Bride
SGC, despite the live and let live saying, we still gawk or cringe if a stranger dresses ott. We don't remain totally unbothered, it does produce a reaction within us and this is no stranger, but a close family member. I am not the only one that has remarked upon her dressing, so have others within the family. I do not know if her immediate family has said anything to her though, maybe not. There are some details I have excluded that perhaps would make it more understandable as to why I seem so bothered or concerned. I'm used to the very classy and chic style that I've mostly seen her in, but she underwent a drastic change that makes me scratch my head, shake it from side to side, and smack my forehead. It kinda seems out of character for her, so that's why I'm surprised. I feel like something is off and I wonder if all is well with her. I know I can't tell her how to dress and I'm not going to impose on her. But should she come stay with me and the topic of clothes and jewelry comes up as it tends to during these occasions, I think I might tactfully give a suggestion. She's free to follow or ignore.
Re: Competing with the Bride
^ so perhaps instead of focusing on the symptom, as someone who is concerned for her, you should ask her what is really going on in her life to cause such a change? Surely that would be kinder and more helpful?
Re: Competing with the Bride
I have never seen anyone actually so decked out that they are trying to compete with the bride. I cannot even fathom that some female guests come with the dupatta on their head. Only brides do that! Wow, that is so incredibly tacky and ridiculous.
The only times I've seen dupatta on the head is on the women who wear hijab. I've never seen a guest drape the dupata like the bride. Hard to imagine a guest walk into a hall wearing a dupatta that hangs off her shoulder and trails behind her bride-style. :/ Oh wells...
Re: Competing with the Bride
^ so perhaps instead of focusing on the symptom, as someone who is concerned for her, you should ask her what is really going on in her life to cause such a change? Surely that would be kinder and more helpful?
SGC, sab theek hai? Cuz I have no intentions to be unkind to her nor do I want her to be remarked upon unfavorably. I think it would be awkward for me to say, "I sense something's kinda off with you, are you okay?" I'm not gonna rush forth to voice my assumption as I could be wrong. That can be awkward. Of course I will ask how she is, how's life and how much she reveals is up to her. But in the past when got together, we have shared/shown what clothes we're wearing and the sort so if an appropriate segway comes up or if she asks for an opinion, I'll tactfully venture one. This was a topic on my mind, so I thought let's open a thread and people can share their own similar experiences, and thoughts about why people do this and how they respond to it. That's it. If this thread is a problem, then by all means, close it.
Competing with the Bride
This has happened to me at my own wedding! By my first cousin who I'm actually very close to and would least expect it from! She helped me buy all my wedding suits n everything but when the wedding came closer she turned into a bridezilla and it wasn't even her wedding!
She actually had an outfit made that was the same as my wedding day outfit!! I was so stressed about it and pissed off it was so upsetting but in the end the whole family were so angry at her they just ignored her in the whole wedding! She even copied my shoes which took me months to find :(
The point is people will point and laugh or just assume she's a newly wed bride but no one will ever mistake her for the bride. And many people crave attention and can't even let brides have that one special day, it's a complex that people have no point trying to fight it!