College Girl

strangeworld · May 24, 2015, 6:37pm

Re: College Girl

Salaam. Here is the issue: I have a cousin who lives in London, his parents want him to get married to an old family friends daughter who also lives in London. The family of the girls is good and the girl seems to be nice as well, but my cousin has one hang up. The girl is studying at a University in London(same city as her family home) but instead of commuting to University she is living in the dorms. My cousin, a boy, was not allowed to leave home and had to commute to University and can’t wrap his head around how the mother allowed her daughter to live at the dorms instead of at the home? He thinks the girl may not be family oriented as she does not live at home or lacks any empathy towards her family, or perhaps she is out on her own “experimenting”.

I honestly told him that the family is good, and we have know them for years, and the girl met you very nicely and seems to be good. He just doesn’t understand why the girl can’t commute and decided to live away from her family. Maybe someone who has experience or knows reasons that why girls living in the same city as her parents would rather stay in dorms vs family home? He thinks the girl may have wanted freedom from her parents and is “experimenting” as he put it. He also didn’t like the fact that she has ZERO desi/muslim friends. I think he is overreacting and told him to stop thinking so hard, she is a nice girl. He thinks she is nice, but maybe not as family oriented, especially if he had a daughter he would not allow her to live on her own. I am not sure, is he right? Have you known girls like this?

She can be dedicated to her studies even at home, what’s the other excuse?

I think she’s the type of girl who likes to run away from stuff and just focus on her own core well being and self satisfaction. When I was in uni most of the girls who used to live in hostels/dorms were considered gay.

I even once talked to a girl who turned out to be bisexual so I stopped talking to her. She also lived in similar kind of lifestyle.

Whatever I said can be entirely wrong but when it comes to getting married it’s an important decision and if he’s thinking too much that’s totally normal and reasonable.

You can’t decide by looking at just the good side of the picture, one should definitely think of the bad sides. Her parents letting her study like that is also something that makes someone very curious and is totally something to think about.