When I first met that kid begging he must be 5, right in front of “Standard Chartered” bank Peshawar. He had a few chewing gums in his hand that he wanted to sell. Initially I shooed him off. Later on when I saw him at the same spot, I told him….
“Your parents should be ashamed to have sent you out for begging”.
Each time he kept quite. Recently in winters when I saw the same kid without shoes and warm clothing I said…
“Your parents have sent you in this attire just that you can make more money”.
To which for the first time he quite innocently said
“ No, No!!! My father is dead, I will have shoes and a jumper tomorrow, my mom has given my shoes and the jumper to my sister for today, tomorrow I will get them back, we take turns”
I was quite shocked with his answer, whether it was the truthfulness, or the naiveness, or the shame that I could spend thousands of rupees in self indulgence where as this kid did not have bare necessities of life.
He is 7 now, but I always try to avoid him when I go to the bank.
Once upon a time long long ago when I was making loads of cash, I used to dish out large amount’s of money to child beggars, but since God stopped my bread and butter , I stopped their’s.
I dont know how people can be so hard of heart. Its everywhere but I did happen to see more of it when i visited over there. Like, we went to this nice afghani restaurant and were brought so much food that we could finish only about half of it. Right across the street was a young woman with 3 young kids, yes they were begging and obviously hungry and very possibly homeless. I asked to have our leftovers brought out to them and they did....but they did it like they were feeding dogs. I wanted to cry. Then, at the wedding we went to, the groom was showered with dollar bills and the little beggar children were allowed to come collect the money once the dance was done. As soon as the money was gone, the little children were chased away...even though you could see that they were so very hungry and in complete awe of the lavish food that was set up.
So very many fond and warm memories I have of my trips over there. But these two experiences, while I know they happen everywhere, just put a dark damper on the whole experience.
mamaof3 I think part of t is that people get desensitized because they see so much of that. secondly in some cases its a begging gang, they choose to beg.
sadly due to that many deserving people dont get some help because people thin they are scam artists as well.
To me that is one of the toughest things to see when I go to Pakistan.
yaaar, spend 1500 dollars to come over just to keep the candle of humility burning? sorry Pakistan trip is just not good nuff ROI on my money, now that my grandparents are gone.
It'd be wrong for me to suggest anything of you ...
I would have bought him a sweater.
I dont believe in giving them money because I dotn know that they will use it for the right reasons.
tsk, Muniya we are kindred spirits... Well each one of us would love to do that but dear me, you don't know what goes on, on the sidelines. As someone mentioned most of these, if not all, belong to powerful and financially sound gangs who own the latest mobiles/cell-phones to coordinate amongst themselves. Its not far fetched for me to say that a sweater from you or a pair of shoes from someone else in a few days in all likelihood could find its way in the local market.
i know i know such things must not deter us from helping out the needy ones in their hour of distress but the powerful rackets of so-called affluent beggers ( and i say this because the money is either snatched from the kids, women and old men, or a specific sum taken from them by their leader) prevent many a people from helping those who genuinely deserve to be helped.
After the earthquake of October 8th, ammi told me about what she had read as well as observed. She said many of these beggers travelled up north (from karachi) to collect the blankets and items only to sell them in the local market. Khair while i am at it let me also share something that she felt saddened at. While looking for a comforter, she was appalled to find blankets meant for the earthquake victims in one of the shops with this tag on the side, 'for the earthquake victims, not for sale.' I don't know whether its the army, the beggers or someone else who did it to earn some quick buck from such a cheap act.
If it was about someone being stingy with their money then we could say it was about being kind or unkind. But I don't think that is often the case. More often than not, it is extremely difficult to ascertain whether the 'beggar' is begging out of desparation or simply because its his/her business. This is on top of the fact that if you give anything to this beggar, they will most likely send 10 more your way. Furthermore, if you give them money you're encouraging their system.
A lady used to visit my aunts house and she used to sell bracelets that she made herself. This was her living, her life trade. A few months ago she visited my aunt again, without her bracelets. My aunt asked her where her trade was. She replied, 'oh I've stopped doing that, I earn much more begging.'
This isn't the case with all beggars, of course. But by the time we've made our way through the entire thought process of trying to establish whether they're genuine or not... well you still can never come to a conclusion.
Often there are boys, like the 'cold beggar' you described. Whenever we encounter them, my cousin asks them if they want to work and if they say they do, he tells them to come to his fathers factory the next day, making sure they know exactly where it is and that they'll have a wage, food and a place to stay if they want. Never yet, has one actually turned up.
Similarly, my grandma often asks young girls if they want to work as maids. Often, they do turn up. Alhamdulillah, then they have a place to stay, and my grandma is able to provide their 'jahez' when they get married, by the Grace of Allah.
It's a vicious circle kind of system. Any ideas on how to break this vicious circle, even in small ways?
maybe one day you wont have bare necessities of life and while some idiot pretends like he has a lot and spends thousands on self-indulgence you will know exactly how the poor kid must have felt.
