Cleaning

Lifestyle Relationships
1

i don’t know how to start…
for past some days i’m really feeling frustrated…i think i’m tired of evaluating my routine again n again…!!!
back home among mysiblings i was considered as a cleaning freak but now i’m failed…!!!

i want to see all my house neat n clean…all the time
all the dresses of my family washed pressed/ ironed hanging in our wardrobe
everything free of dust …everything in its place
i love to cook n bake everything at home
i love to have a variety of meal for my kids
n the list is not complete yet…!!

but now the problem is…i can’t do all these things in 24 hours n i don’t know WHY…???

i know there r many ppl on this board who are professional…n i really wonder how you people do manage it…???
n i’m not even a working woman…

every day there is something on my ‘to do’ list which i haven’t done
everytime there is a sense of failure…!!! i wish i had days longer than 24 hrs

to some extent my kids can be blamed but No…almost everyone has kids…so what’s wrongwith me …???

how you all manage it …can you give me any ideas…???
i’m really looking forward to your comments n suggestions…!!!

2

Involve everyone at home in doing something by training them. Even if your kids learn not to create much mess then it would help towards achieivng a cleaner home. everyone should do whatever they can do and stop worrying about these things.

3

True. It's not a single persons job. And don't be so critical of yourself. You should definitely have your husband help you out if your kids are too young. When you were unmarried and living with your siblings you obviously had less responsiblities, with even those divided amongst you and your siblings, so it's less of a burden and less pressure. With your own family to look after its like you never have enough time. The only way out is to have others do their share of work too. Assign different tasks to different people. Assign different days of the week for different tasks for yourself. Like dust 3 days a week not every day. Have everyone iron their clothes themselves! Don't overwork yourself in an attempt to have a variety of foods for your family. Make 2 different things instead of 4! Just prioritize and dont fret.

4

thanks for replying .....both of you

its not the problem related with distribution of chores,,,,,,,,,rather i'll say its poor management perhaps ........
kids r too young (2 n $) to help but still they help me a lot
whenever they see me tidying up they follow me .....they help me laying the table n most of the time whatever i ask them to do they wont refuse .......but after all they are just kids ....its stupid to have too many expectations
n my husband........well he is too busy always .......he works for 12hrs a day 7 days a week......n still should i expect him to help me .......??????
the question is what do i do....????
n u didn't tell me how you all manage it....???

i wonder if all here live in a"jag mag karta ghar"

5

make a lil time table kinda thing its not u strict havto put up wuth it .. but atleast u'll kno wut r u supposed to do at that time... for example... morning 11-1:00 its clean up time ... afterwards just try to stay up to that schedule... works for me ... :-)

6

[QUOTE]
*Originally posted by Aleezay: *
make a lil time table kinda thing its not u strict havto put up wuth it .. but atleast u'll kno wut r u supposed to do at that time... for example... morning 11-1:00 its clean up time ... afterwards just try to stay up to that schedule... works for me ... :-)
[/QUOTE]

Haha...badi aai schedule bananay wali...lol

7

i can totally understand it Afia..i have seen people around me that are in the same situation as yours.. being a homemaker is a full time job itself..and since you have two young kids..the responsibilities add up.

You also asked how other folks manage their timings..i'll tell you about my household..we don't have any younger kids at home.. i personally have managed my household by myself when my ammi was away or was on bed.

We live in an apartment..so its less work to manage..we vaccum twice a week..dust twice a week..washroom cleaning twice a week..tidy the place everyday..clean and mop kitchen everyday..laundry once a week..cooks food everyday in the evening time(for next day)..fresh garam roti in the evening, and fresh salad for dinner..at night: subha kay parathay..and roti for lunch (if someone is gonna be around)...and lunch for siblings to take to school and college.

Weekend time is for grocery, doing outside related works..for special meals(farmaishi khanay)..and for visit of relatives/family friends to our place/their place..

Alhumdullilah everthing gets managed somehow :)

Also you have asked about suggestions: i would say that just give yourself 2 hours max for kitchen..around night time or morning time..when kids aren't bothering you..lets say they are asleep or something..do the cooking part then. Ocassional cooking during the days is ok when your kids ask for something special. Also, divide such and such day for certain work..lets say on monday you'll do the laundry..tuesday is for cleaning the washrooms..wednesday is a dusting day..and so forth..this way you'll have more time to spend with your kids :)

8

Qrius n Aleezay…thanks alot…:flower1:

Aleezay i try to follow a timetable …usually i just make a listof all tasks for a week…so that i don’t forget something…but still…

Qurius…i was almost about to faint when i read how you do it…i do everything everyday…cooking,dusting ,mopping, vaccuming,washing clothes n ironing …n not to mention bathroom cleaning…m its not that i love it just coz i need it …may be coz of kids …!!!..n partly because of my own hobbies like sewing means alot of threads n tiny pieces everywhere …specially when i have to move around while i’m not supposed to …!!!

n when n how often you clean your window panes…n your microwave …n freezer …n cooking range…and and …
oh God …i’m being crazy

may be i should give a try to this "twice a week "routine

anyway thanx again :flower2:

9

Afia, I see where u are coming from, what I think is that you need a change in your daily routine, do something different for a while, what I see is that you do cleaning and work at home as to keep yourself busy (and sometimes you are over doing it) all this is not giving you the satisfication as it used to give you, I might be wrong but you need a new routine and a change from time to time from your daily work.

10

Afia

I live in a jagmag karta ghar. I am married and both of us are working fulltime.

The place alhumdulillah is a decent size but we maintain it.

key is organization and routine.. i dont know your situation so will just give some general advise based on some observations.

One of the biggest thing is organization, everything needs to have a proper place, everything needs to be in its proper place. one of the problems i see especially with desis is that they are packrats..way too much stuff and not enough or proper storage for it, crammed closets, spillign drawers, bursting at the seams kitchen cabinets.

the first thing to do may be to get rid of everything you dont use and is just there because "it may be helpful sometime" then..things that you dont use ona daily basis, put them away, find a place where they can just be stored and accessed when needed but that they are not in your way or competing for space with items which you use on a daily basis.

set a routine and make sure people follow it. i.e. laundry goes directly in hamper..laundry gets done every X days. have waste baskets in every room, the trash must go in the waste basket and then collected in a big bag every X days.

keep cleaning supplies and instruments easily accessible. if someone drops something, its easy to just grab a hand held vaccum cleaner and clean it right up, rather than feeling overwhelmed that you will have to go drag the large vaccum cleaner from the broom closet from behind clothes and shoes and junk. (being organized makes sure that everything is easily accessible when you need it)

wash dishes right away or put them in the dishwasher right away after you are done cookign/eating.

its when things dont get taken care fo right then and start accumulating then it can become overwhelming.

cookign wise, i know what my mum used to do she will prepare a bunch of meat and put is in the freezer in smaller packets, as needed she will take the meat out and make allo gosht, timatar gosht, palak gosht etc. maybe you can try some of that. I dont know what your husband's expectation is i.e. does he expect a freshly made 8 course meal everyday or not, so i dont know.

the process of getting organized can be painful..takesa a lot of time to go through the junk, but once that is done, its a very smooth sailing.
Do it over a weekend, enlist yer husband's help. make it an event..get food delivered, get movies/cartoons of kids so theya re occupied and tackle one room ata time. get the kitchen sorted, and then hit bathrooms, closets etc.. u can figure out a workplan here :)

and then...when all is clean..go take a vacation, and make it a real vacation..no chores, no cleaning. then you will return relaxed and to a clean organized place which will take a fraction of the effort to maintain than it did to constantly clean.

11

Fraudz, you have ben trained well…:hehe:

12

[QUOTE]
Originally posted by Fraudz: *
allo gosht, **timatar* gosht, palak gosht etc
[/QUOTE]

I'm sorry, I know it has got nothing to do with the topic but I was reading through ur post and this cracked me up bigtime (I know I'm crazy)

Thanx for the laugh :D

13

Kaleem

I have lived on my own since i was 14. The choice was to have a kewl pad, or the filthy kind most desi students display :) I chose to be organized.

I know its not a very desi trait :) but heck it works for me.

14

[QUOTE]
*Originally posted by Fraudz: *
Afia

I live in a jagmag karta ghar. I am married and both of us are working fulltime.
[/quote]

wow.......great....!!!!

[quote]
key is organization and routine.. .
[/quote]

i agree

[quote]
One of the biggest thing is organization, everything needs to have a proper place, everything needs to be in its proper place. one of the problems i see especially with desis is that they are packrats..way too much stuff and not enough or proper storage for it, crammed closets, spillign drawers, bursting at the seams kitchen cabinets.
[/quote]

i understand your point .......but its not the case here.......actually my drawers, cabinets,n closets r more clean inside than outside........no i mean inside is more proper........coz its only my "territory"

[quote]
set a routine and make sure people follow it
[/quote]

so far .......here is some problem.......n problem is that i can't accomplish all the chores in 24 hrs.....but i really want to.

[quote]
wash dishes right away or put them in the dishwasher right away after you are done cookign/eating.
[/quote]

its always been my habbit but now most of the times it depends on moods n demands of my kids.....sigh

[quote]
its when things dont get taken care fo right then and start accumulating then it can become overwhelming.
[/quote]

agreed....!

[quote]
cookign wise, i know what my mum used to do she will prepare a bunch of meat and put is in the freezer in smaller packets, as needed she will take the meat out and make allo gosht, timatar gosht, palak gosht etc. maybe you can try some of that.
[/quote]

i'm already doing it.......actually i usually like to freeze half prepared meals in my freezer tooo....so that i can prepare somethin g on very short notice......as you know my kids r fussy eaters

[quote]
and then...when all is clean..go take a vacation, and make it a real vacation..no chores, no cleaning. then you will return relaxed and to a clean organized place which will take a fraction of the effort to maintain than it did to constantly clean.
[/QUOTE]

hehe .......this part is pretty idealistic......at least for me
anyway thanx for replying .....you really did a good job:)

15

Afia

if you are doing all that. i dont see where the problem is, is your husband not supportive? are their too many demands on you from him and ths kids? do you find time for yourself?

an organized place does not take that long to clean. if you are the only one doing all the work, a few hours each day should take care of cooking, cleaning etc. Its not going to be less than that though.

Your husband is probbaly out for work for 8-10 hrs each day. Are you saying that u work non stop for that time and still have things to do?

My mum, when she was taking a break from teaching had a pretty set routine, wake up, make sure everyone got breakfast send us off, pick up the stuff and leave it in the kitchen. pick up our stuff that was in common areas and out it in our room. chill out read a book or magazine. we used to all be back home by 3. so we would eat then. she would have cooked, washed up the dishes while cooking. we would help her set the table and pick up the stuff, sometimes she would bribe us into washing teh dishes oetherwise she would do them right then, from that time till dinner she had nothing to do but spend time with us, play games, etc..dinner would be 8ish and in 45 mins we would have eaten the table cleaned dishes done etc.

On top of that we had guests over, did a lot of socializing. aside from our own junk which she made us clean she took care fo everything.

after we moved to pakistan, she stopped teaching and i would see her schedule taking care of the whole house, cooking up a storm and still having enoug time for herself and her books, friends and Tv shows.

so i am not sure where the challeneg is here in your case, I dont understand it either

16

dunno what to say....!!!!!

i myself don't understand it.......perhaps i'm not quick nough
coz i don't watch tv just listen to it while i'm ironing clothes.......
i have no social circle here......
i assume i don't have much time to read books though till some 3 yrs ago i was fond of reading
i don't take day time naps

only thing i do consider as a recreation is this internet......n even its not like for hours .......it depends on the availability of time.......sometimes i'm online for whole 3-4 hrs n sometimes i don't get a chance for days
sometimes in do some sewing etc. but its too is like once in two weeks

maybe i should recheck this time spending

anyway ......thanx alot

17

It seems to me that the problem is not that you don't know what and how it should be done. But just that you are getting awfully tired of doing it day in and day out.

What you need is a break. A vacation. Something to break the monotony and recharge your batteries.

18

Re: Cleaning

Aslomaalakum sisi
somehow i can see other Mehroo in U so dont worry u r not alone :slight_smile: i was alo called cleaning freak at home , har cheez apni jaga par tarteeb se rakhi ho , gaar chamak raha hoo kids well dressed saaf sustray hoN too i feel very good , i am a home bird and really like to spend time at home so i can easily manage things lakiN now from few weeks my daughter is at home and she is 2 years old and very naughty our kya kahtay haiN shetaN ki khala , kisi cheez ko apni jaga par naa rahnay dati hai so i get so mad sometimes , then my hubby says ke yeh gaar hai Hotel nahi thori se bay tarteebi chalti hai afterall kids haiN so what can we do …
now to ur question > i can manage things when i stay at home ( jo ke aajal meiN hoon) but when i went for job/study too tab bhuht mushkal tha , sara gara ulta para hota tha cz i used to came home at 4 o clock our bachOn ko school and day care center se lay ke gaar anay ke bad i felt so tired ke bus pocho mat , bus kahana pakana aur late jana , thats what i used to do , it was so diffecult for me to mange home and study at same time aur jab mein logoN ko dekhti the who had jobs and kids as well aur wo har kam tarteeb se kartay they thu i was always like :eek: lakin i failed too :frowning: so now i stay at home , take care of kids and home and it is going good again so i think it is very different from person to person , kuch log kar latay haiN our kuch meri tarah …ahhh sad na.

19

Afia baji sub ho jayay ga aap khamakhaan zaada tension na leyn :slight_smile: mehroo aapi aur aap agar kabhee hamaray hostelon mein aa ke kuch logon ke kamray dekhein gee toh aap ko bohot shock pohonchnay wala hae :hehe: meray khayal se aap logon ko toh andaza bhe naheen ho ga ke BAYTARTEEBEE hoti kya hae :biggrin:

20

mr fraudia .. those are very useful & valueable tips and nice to see em coming from a guy. :k:

I have to tell you that not all desis tick in the same way but yes there is a simular kind of pattern found, desi donot like to throw away old things. Yes desi lack on organisation and planning. My mom raised 5 kids and also she worked during some times. We all helped at home to do the chores as to release our mom from loads of work at home. But somehow it was not easy for her to part from her old ‘unused’ things, I think its due to her childhood where she was told to keep things as throwing it away. Well anyway we would throw away things which she meant to keep for years :smiley: hehhe and she would get annoyed with us, now my mom has changed has seen that having less at home makes it less to clean and she does not buy stuff just for the sake of having it in case its ‘needed’

I can tell you that in my place Insahallah, my new apartment, I will be having as less as possible and if I do have some things which i need to store they will go into boxes and down in the basement of the building. Otherwise I just ordered a kichen, which enough space, kitchen cabinets which are hidden and you can utilize every space with things to store and it doesnt look like you actually have cabinets there. Also I have laid a wooden floor with small centeral carpet … which is easy to clean and keeps away germs out, as carpet collects all kind of germs.

I like your idea of having a held vaccum cleaner handy in need, as sometimes we are really lazy to get that heavy vaccum out of the closet.

Well anyway nice tips and i hope people will add more to make house cleaning & maintaining as easy, simple as possible.