Children in Desi Attire

Lifestyle Parenting, Household Affairs and Cuisine corner
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Re: Children in Desi Attire

Must be the same moms that have trouble putting thread through a needle to shorten the shalwars…you know the type the don’t cook either… :cb:

Sizing is always an issue with desi attire for kids…shalwars always need to be adjusted shorter.

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Re: Children in Desi Attire

hareem…it is natural for any human being to opt for the “easy way out”.
children will not speak urdu if it requires effort
teenagers will not clean the room or cook
adults will…well not do anything after all the other stuff they do cuz they’re just plain tired. :cb:

the younger the human the more likely they are to revert to their “natural” inclination.
it is our job as prison wardens, I mean, parents, to ensure that they conform to the norms of society.

please make sure that you can find the sarcasm and the humour in the right parts

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Re: Children in Desi Attire

*jaisa des waisa bhes

*

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Re: Children in Desi Attire

^ lol @ muzna "prison wardens"

i'm one of the ones who didn't really wear shalwar kameez at home ever, except for "dress up" occasions like eid and weddings, or when we were visiting pakistan because no one we knew there would wear western clothes. it was just never an issue in our household, i suppose. when i got older, 13 and up, my mum did encourage me to wear more shalwar kameezes but i was just reluctant because i hadn't really worn them much before so i never felt comfortable in them. it felt too much like a costume, like you said, Muzna. if i'd had a baby girl, i think she'd have quite the extensive desi wardrobe and i would probably put her into the habit of wearing them more just so she could get comfortable with the concept and not feel awkward about it as she got older, but with my son, i think it'll be an occasional eid / desi wedding thing, and when he's older, it will probably be more up to him to choose what to wear. basically, i can't force him to wear what his dad won't wear on a regular basis either, you know? and his dad ain't desi so shalwar kameez is a dress up costume for him. i'd rather he know how to speak urdu, or at least understand it, as he grows up in a mixed-cultural household than worry about how often he wears shalwar kameez.

does anyone else find this is more of a gender thing i.e. girls are told to wear desi clothing more often than boys are? if you take your daughter to a wedding in a shalwar kameez or for jumma prayers, would you also ask your son to wear one too, or would it be more acceptable for him to go in western wear?

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Re: Children in Desi Attire

My sons like desi clothes but my daughter does not. Her mom has to force her to wear desi dresses for desi weddings and other desi occasions.

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for jumma/eid my hubby wears his thobe, so inshallah I will have my son wear a little thobe or shalwar kameez too.

it is kind of hard for boys to wear desi clothes all the time. I see SGC's point. Plus there isn't much variety either...same kind of shalwar kameez.

i think its more about modesty. Usually when preteen/teen girls are told to wear shalwar kameez, its usually for the use of the dupatta to cover their chest. i know my mom wouldnt like my bros walking around in shorts and a tank at home; just the same way my dad woudlnt like me wearing jeans and a tshirt.

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Re: Children in Desi Attire

^ aww, i want a little thobe too for baby! how cute uff.

also, i get the modesty thing, but how about a looser t-shirt or a sweatshirt at home if she's reluctant to manage a big dupatta?

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Re: Children in Desi Attire

when i went to makkah 2 years ago, i wanted to buy all the little baby thobs and little girl abayas..lol.

is it odd that ive already starting planning my future kids masjid wear?

love the little thobes with the hoods (moroccon style)....man, who said little boys are hard to dress??? :D

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Re: Children in Desi Attire

I can see how it would be difficult for little boys sgc....especially if Dad is not dressing in that attire save for special occasions. Completely understandable.

Modesty is a big issue with girls in our culture.....it should be for boys as well (don't anybody go and make this into a discrimination thread).

But if we don't "enforce" from an early age then all the kids will again "fall into the natural inclination" and find it difficult to "manage" a dupatta or the baggy-ness of the shalwar etc, etc. My theory is that if I teach her young and teach her well then she will become used to the attire and find it as easy as anything else.......

goes off to hunt for a thobe for Gabe

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I don't have a problem with my kid wearning desi cloths to other's ppl places, my kid is crazy about desi cloths, as soon as I tell her we are going somewhere, she goes and start looking through her desi wardrobe.

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I have friends who always complain about wearing Desi clothes.

I'm fine with it. I can wear it whenever I want in Muharram season lawl.

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I can't say I've seen this ever happening? As an adult it's different but as a kid I hated being forced to wear shalwar kameez...

I've observed my nieces/nephews in canada, and I don't think any of them are forced either way....i've seen em wear both western and desi outfits.

I guess because shalwar kameez "looks" better and nicer than sweats and teeshirt.

and girls' shalwar kameez (just girls clothes period!) look so cute. And I don't know what's wrong with wearing it for a wedding/Eid either....for special occasions, I personally find desi clothes are just much nicer and prettier than western stuff

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Re: Children in Desi Attire

although I am living in Pakistan but to me desi outfits are much better than others. The problem is here a good desi outfit cost 3 times more than other normal skirts , t-shirts & pants etc. So I usually buy them for eid and other special occasions. :smiley: kids look extremely cute in desi dresses :jano:

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My kids are OK with wearing Desi cloths if cloths are comfortable. Girls obviously have a lot to enjoy when it come to Desi attire so my 5 yo also want to have her bangles and jewlery with desi cloths oh and not to forget red marker that she use as nail polish :smack:

We encourage them to wear the cloths in Desi gatherings and in dress shows @ schools.

Son (who is 9) lately is raising his voice against wearing shilwar qameez though and his argument is pretty solid “I dont wana wear this because no body else wear this at party”

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Re: Children in Desi Attire

^ i see his point.

muzna, i see yours too. i think you’re lucky you have a little girl to dress up as you do! and their desi clothes are so much cuter coupled with all the little accessories. i don’t know a single desi girl who doesn’t love dressing up.
i think the more of a non-issue it is (we wear western clothes sometimes, sometimes we wear eastern clothes, no big deal) the easier it is for kids to transition from one to the other. it doesn’t have to be complicated. like i said, if i’d been put in the habit of wearing shalwar kameezes from a young age, i’d have been fine with it, but because we were living abroad for so long, inevitably they just became occasion-wear and then i never felt comfortable in them on a regular basis. and more so as a teenager when you’re already going through an awkward phase, the last thing i wanted was to wear clothing that i felt was too over-the-top/alien compared to a pair of jeans and a top. mind you, all my tops had to be loose fitting (large on a medium fit body, anyone?) and hip-covering (not flattering in a large size on a petite girl) while i was growing up because of the modesty requirement. yeah, i was a really awkward teenager lol. i never realised you could be modest and still be stylish until i was out of university! d’oh! :smack:

afshi, haha, its not weird at all! its good to plan ahead with everything, including future kids masjid wear!

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i think when at home, its alright to be more comfortable and lose the dupatta...i lived in my tshirt and shalwar and huge BOCA sweatshirt (actually still do lol). It was more outside of the house and going to dawats/events that the parents wanted us to wear shalwar kameez.

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ever sice I was brn I wore desi clothing so I was use too it I use to be the only one wearing it to school and I loved my 4 yr old only wears salwaar kameez with a hijab and I think she will only be allowed to wear desi clothing.

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Re: Children in Desi Attire

I always wear pakistani outfits on eid or if I have to go to someone’s house for a special occasion such as dawats for example. However, I just wear western if it’s simply just visiting my extended families/family friend’s houses.

I guess western outfits are just less effort and more comfortable. At least you don’t have to worry about tripping over, or nearly being choked to death by the scarf desi outfits come with. Believe me, this has happened to me many times.

This one girl I know, she doesn’t even wear pakistani outfits to weddings. She simply wears a long western ball gown type dress.

There’s nothing wrong in pakistani clothing, I just think the immigrants you talk about would want to fit in with the society better.

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I grew up wearing pakistani outfits and I used to love it. When I got married, I continued to wear them for the first year I lived with my inlaws but once we moved out, I could never imagine wearing it again lol. I wear shalwar kameez once a year - for Eid or more than once a year if we have weddings to attend. Other then that.. i’m all american. It’s a lot more comfortable.

I have a two year old now and I don’t really have a preference for her. I’ve decided to put religion before culture in her life.. and if I can accomplish that, i’ll say i’ve done my job :slight_smile:

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Some parents don’t encourage or emphasise it because it’s just not a priority for them, it’s not because they think there’s something wrong with it..

I lived in an area where there were literally no shops selling shalwar khameez and at that time we didn’t go ‘back home’ much either.. We could probably have stocked up when we came up to London but it just wasn’t a priority.. I was one of those girls who wore maxi skirts and long dresses to dawats and the few desi girls I knew back then did the same.. I tended to wear shalwar khameez or lehengas for weddings but a couple of times I did just wear a long gown instead.. My Mum started wearing hijab when I was around 12/13 and she was absolutely fine with me dressing that way.. If the skirts or dresses are long and modest I really don’t see why there should be a problem.. It actually would have really upset me if an auntie complained about something like that, it’s not hurting anyone and our girls especially have a lot to deal with when it comes to expectations and judgements in regards to their behaviour imo..