Re: chalaak and taiz vs 'simple'
It doesn't matter! Bottom line: desi people LOVE to categorize you- and this is just one of the ways females are portrayed to be conniving no matter how genuine your intentions may be! True story: I was visiting my extended family after x number of years and I was super excited to be seeing them and thus my entire stay there was warm and nice and I adapted myself really well to ...certain lack of luxuries, etc and didnt' complain or act spoiled. My last week there, one of my aunts told my cousin (who later told me) that she told her to be "cautious" of me because I was too nice and no one can be that nice and therefore I am "taiz" or "chalaak". Arggh!
In general, and this may exist in other communities, too, but has anyone noticed a strong association with female vs female insecurity in our community? We constantly feel a need to "compete" per se with other females and this ties into the coveted concepts of "izzat" and "sharam" yadda yadda. We've got to start respecting each other before we demand it from our male counterparts. Just my $0.02