Can you really put a girl above your mother or for the ladies here, a guy above your father? Is it even possible? I don’t think I ever could but some people do and I just wanted to know how?!?
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And do some ladies expect to be prioritised over a guys mother and vice versa for the men here?
Re: Can you really put a girl above your mother?
It’s not really putting the SO above your mother or father is it? I would never expect the guy to put me above his mother.
Can you explain your last sentence, the " I don’t think I ever could…"? I want to know your perspective on this.
Re: Can you really put a girl above your mother?
I don’t think I could ever put a girl above my parents or even sisters (at this point) cause relationships that aren’t bound by genetics happen to be conditional, truth is most people’s feelings towards their spouse is conditional and temporary which makes sense cause there’s no blood connection.
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what is an example of putting one’s spouse over their parents? each one has their own place.
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If your motheorders you to divorce her, varna doodh nahi bakshun gii..n your mother is verbally, emotionally and physically abusive towards your wife and creates dramas where there is no peace. It happened to this lovely family we know.
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if you are not weaned off then you need your lil girl blanket and shouldn’t have or deserve a girl.
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Islamically speaking, husband takes precedence over father in law but that is another topic on its own.
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If you have sh*tty/abusive parents, it isn’t hard putting anyone else who you have a romantic/platonic relationship with over them.
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I used to think my brother would be that way when his wife came along but now I can tell that he really loves her. I and my other brother were the most important in his life of course along with parents but now, since he’s in love, he’s blinded to all of his wife’s flaws and he feels like other women should be like his wife.
He’s a completely different person now. The way he used to see me as his little sis, the connection I had with him is the strong connection he has with his wife now. She’s the center of his world. Of course, I would take a back burner to her because even I feel like that’s how it should be. She’s someone he would have kids with, she would be the one he would grow old with, and eventually they would take care of each other in their old age.
Love and marriage changes most men, it couldn’t be more true in my brother’s case.
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Every relation in your life has its own place and importance, you have to treat them all with love and respect. The question of putting one above other should not even arise.
Re: Can you really put a girl above your mother?
You never know what you could do, till you actually do it. So don’t utter big words.
And hope you don’t have a mother or wife who compete with each other. That’s not a very pleasant situation to be in.
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An example would be like if one of your parents was sleeping on the ground, and you picked up your spouse and stepped over them, then you would be over their parents.
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look what the cat dragged in.
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:rawr:
Re: Can you really put a girl above your mother?
Words of wisdom !
Can totally relate to that. Elder brother did something similar.
Re: Can you really put a girl above your mother?
Not sure what it means to “put a guy” over my father, or a girl over a mother in the case of a guy.
Both parents and spouses have their own rights and it’s a tricky case of balancing both.
If your parents are wrong and your spouse is right then you must very respectfully let them know and vice-versa. Marriage is not choosing one over the other, it’s about balancing and fulfilling the rights of all involved. The person whose in a relationship/marriage should be mature enough to not cloud their thinking and judgment over extreme love for either their parents or spouse that makes them take measures where they have to choose a side.
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Re: Can you really put a girl above your mother?
I’m not sure what would constitute putting the wife above the mother here. Can you elaborate?
Re: Can you really put a girl above your mother?
How much time do you spend with your mom while you’re still single? How much do you listen to her, follow her edicts while still being single?
I talk to my mum, listen to her advice, I’d say I love her. However, I’m the one with the final say in all matters me. That’ll have to change if I decide to marry someone. I’ll have to put most of my decisions to vote, negotiate stuff I decide on my own right now. In that sense your spouse is kinda above everyone else around you, even your parents. They have more say in your life - major decisions about it - than everyone else. You shouldn’t be thinking about marriage just yet if you can’t make peace with giving someone that kinda control over your life.
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That depends on what kind of role do you play in family life. If you are a leader, you will be expected to take a lead and make the important decisions.