can I have some advice from people who may be known to this problem?

[ninjamummy]

Re: can I have some advice from people who may be known to this problem?

@coffeegirl

Thanks for the recent article, it was very interesting and now I am going to make decision after I have talked to my mother and see how strongly she retaliates to my no’s

The second documentary is one I have watched over and over again and it scares me bery much …so much so that I am willing to defy the odds and not go

I’m not sure if you have seen the entire documentary, I saw it when it first came out, it broke my heart watching it. I can’t find the link to the entire thing, otherwise I would post it.
I grew up in the UK, and many of my fellow classmates were from Mirpur, Punjab, India. Some were forced into arranged marriages at 15, 16 , 17 and never, seen or heard of again.
A close friend , one of 4 sisters, and 2 brothers did act as she was to be married to a cousin in Mirpur. Twenty + years ago, our schools were becoming aware of the problem,and we had various police, social services, Childline (Esther Rantzen) visit . My friend confided in a trustworthy teacher, and with the help of the headmistress , she was taken away from her home the day she was to fly to Pakistan. She was 17 at the time. Because of her actions, the bleak future for her sisters also became brighter. She mentioned to the social services that her life was in danger as were the lives of her sisters, so action was taken by authorities. Her father, brothers and uncles made threats against the girls, etc, but they never acted upon it. They were being watched.
An Imam at the time, now deceased, he also performed my nikkah, spoke with the girls family. MA, an imam who stood up for the young girls rights, unheard of 20 years ago.
The girls are all successful individuals now; two living in the US(married), one is in New Zealand, and one remaining in the UK. They completed Uni, etc and did further studies. They are living the lives they chose for themselves. I know the father passed away a few years ago. He thought his daughters had brought great shame to their khandaan, but towards the end , he was grudgingly proud of them. He would say to my father ’ Yeh mahol aisa hai, lakiya karhi keh jasa mahol hai". The mother moved back to Pakistan. The 2 brothers are skirt chasers, hitting the masjid for namaaz, and then hitting the clubs for all kinds of action. They did not complete further studies,; have stalls in a local market and corner stores from what I last heard.

I’Allah, you will defy the odds, and IA you have a right to your life.