Re: can I have some advice from people who may be known to this problem?
I totally agree with you 
Inshallah I will teach my children to stand on their own feet rather than live of benefits which is what my dad does and he uses all the benefits for building the house rather than giving us decent upbringing. Some weeks we have to limit the food we buy because he uses it all up. I can’t remember the last time my mum bought something for her self…I have learnt not to be selfish 