Why you are asking about God’s will ( which is actually your own well being and good forutune) if you are not ready for submission ?
If you want marry someone then do it without involving God in this. And accept responsibilities of your action.
It is like going to wise old man asking his advice and once he tells you something then you stand up and say. Hey wise old man, you may be wise but this is my personal matter and i will do what ever my heart and mind tells me, thanks but no thanks 
Not drawing any parralel its just an analogy. Istikhara is totally not required for any decision, it is optional, just for seeking devine guidance.
If you dont want to submit , then dont ask for a command. simple