Calling your spouse by his name?

[Siren]

Re: Calling your spouse by his name?

@AndyPandy

A couple of days ago, my mother was talking to my sister in law on the phone (she lives over seas for now). And she asked her if she wanted to speak with anyone else. She then answered with my brothers name. After the call my mother and father were lecturing my brother about how he shouldn’t speak to her that often and to tell that her that she should stop calling him by his name. They said a wife shouldn’t do that and that she wouldn’t respect him in the future.

Naturally, afterwards I asked my parents why they told him that. They said it was a matter of respect. And then gave themselves as an example. My mum never calls my dad by his name at home. Sometimes when she’s out she’ll say his name but otherwise she doesn’t. I didn’t really pay much attention to it until now, because my sister in law asked to talk to my brother. What else was she supposed to say?

Maybe its because I’ve grown up in a western society. But how does the wife not saying her husbands name show respect? I don’t understand it. What else is she meant to call him? Shouldn’t the husband comply to these rules as well?

The more I think about it, the stranger it seems to me. (like I said, maybe its because I’ve grown up in a western society)

Please, do tell if this is a common occurrence. And if you or your spouse do this as well, and if you do what do you call them? I would really like to know.

My parents are kind of the same. My mum doesn’t ever refer to my dad by his name, but then again neither does my dad ever call my mum by name. It’s more of a “suniye”, “sunaaiye” type of relationship. In public they use words like “unhon ne yeh kaha thaa”, etc. But again, they understand that they are from a different era. they totally don’t have a problem with my calling my husband by name. My husband’s family is a little more conservative though and they are less understanding of the new generation. Every family has their little oddities I guess.