thanks for getting back to me. i certainly see where ur coming from and agree with some of ur points but i don't think it applies to every relationship especially the part where you said '*You want him to respect you and marry you? Dont date him'. *some of my friends have the same mentality and even i used to think that but now im like if i didn't date my bf how would i know i want to marry him? lol kwim? that doesnt mean he doesnt respect me. i've been dating him for 2 yrs and i know him inside out... i know what makes him tick, his likes/dislikes etc and i know for sure that we are 100% compatiable and he is someone i can spend my life with. for me i wouldn't have known all this if i didnt date him and spend as much time as i do with him. his mum holds traditional views and even she knows that he has someone in his life and she accepts that and has no problem with it because these days a lot of the older generation (where i live) have come to realise and understand that this is how their off spring will find a life partner.
I am not dating him so for your sake, I hope you're right. I live in the US and know the whole ringamarole.
Btw, if there is anything I know about marriage I know this: you dont know everything about your man until you've lived with him. Expecting you know it all before marriage is a recipe for disaster and classic relationship/love marriage mistake. Please dont make it.
Like PCG said...tell him to start talking to his family about an engagement or something...then watch his eyes and how fast they go from side to side.
If he steps up, you have yourself a winner and more power to you. If not, Im sorry but he is a typical desi guy.