You go to your aunts house and there are some other aunties there and maybe even a sweet grandmother. The moment you walk in the door you get a big kiss on your cheek from one auntie, and then the next, and often times the grandmother. Sometimes you get two kisses, one on each cheek. A hug is given as well sometimes.
I dont know why I feel this way, but I dont like being kissed. I know they are just showing their appreciation and affection and I feel its very sweet of them but I just dont like it. Hugs are fine, but not kisses. I just feel sooooooo uncomfortable. Sometimes I feel tormented inside because I know its not a bad thing and its not a germs issue with me. I guess I feel awkward about expressing certain emotions in public. Maybe its my shyness. I am happy to be there but why cant aunties just stick to hugs?? sigh
There is no way I would tell an auntie I dont like being kissed, I wouldnt want to hurt her feelings.
When I have gone to Pakistan some of my chachas kissed me too, and I just stood there wide-eyed I was so shocked. I gave a faint smile and proceeded into the room with my cousins.
Any of you experience this or feel this way? I dont know what to do. Grow accustomed to it? sigh
Learn to love yourself, then learn to love one-another
I dont like being kissed too but i guess we can't do anything.
I say just put up with it or when you do meet them next time take your hand out as if to say asalamalikum in good time, once you have shook hands quickly go to the next khala. They should get the message and it might work
In our house we have this habbit/custom of chummis..every time we go out’a the house or come in me and my sis’ always get kissed by mommy and paapa and they get kisses from us in return…this kisskiss business has been going on for as long as I can remember…
…any way geting back to the topic of getting kissed by auntys…I was about 15 yrs old we went to Pakistan and my mom’s friend came to see us, she asks my mom “Saeed aur Shaheen kahaan hein, unhein zara bulao, i want 2 see them” so my mommy calls us and tells us beta aunty ko salaam karo so i just do a gangsta hand shake with her and say salam
i was jus’ about to leg it when this aunty grabs me and places a big sloppy kiss on my cheek eurghhhh and guess what??? i jus’ automatically kiss her back…
I think oh my Lord wot have i just done..i mean it just happened automatically i was so use to kissing back… i was soooo embarassed, i was hoping the earth’d split open ‘n’ swallow me…
I don't have a problem with doing this to people I really like and am comfortable with. What I abhore is this fake hugging-shugging that desi chicks do (or I've noticed, any girl for that matter) when saying goodbye. For instance, I don't particularly like (much less know) ALL the people I am at a private dinner party with, so why these mandatory hugs? It's gotten so bad that I'll often take a step back and stick out my hand towards the woman about to propel herself at me. So odd.
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Originally posted by lost:
*Munni...at least you're ahead of me! Not only do I not like being kissed...I don't even like being hugged! *
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lost,
To me getting hugs is better than being kissed, but if I had it my way, there would probably be no kissing and no hugs. I feel awkward receiving both. Cant put my finger on why though. A handshake would be wonderrrrrrrrrfuuuullll. smile
samunder,
Yes I have noticed that, and have considered that maybe its done for formality sake. I have noticed girls who I know dont get along well, sometimes do it when meeting in groups. Interesting to say the least. smile
Learn to love yourself, then learn to love one-another
But I am the lucky one ... I dont liked to be kissed by females of my families .. I mean I do like to be kissed by females .. but not family members or even distant family members.
funny topic! Being kissed on the cheeks on both sides by aunties is alright for me but being hugged is so awkward!! My reasons are, I feel like a lil’ bachi and secondly I don’t like the body contact with them yuki!
What about when the uncles that kiss. I had this funny and yuki experience during my trip to pakistan this year. We (my cousin and her family) were invited for dinner to a family, where my cousin was about to marry into. When we were about to leave, the uncle(father of the dullah) was standing near the door, I said khuda hafiz and lower my head thinking the he is gonna put his hand on my head, but to my astonishment he took my face in his hands and placed a big sloppy kiss on my forhead. I was so suprised, if I would not have lowered my head on time he would have kissed on my eyes
hmmm...funny though, I love hugging my friends - big tight hugs, like you really mean them. My friends and I always hug. During the holidays when I'm away from my friends I feel so un-hugged - I actually miss it! I hate it when people give you these wierd, loose, cold hugs and when these fake Pakistani women kiss u on the cheek and give u one of them 'wierd' hugs. I much prefer the hugging to the kissing as well but sometimes u just have to go with the flow. One kiss here, another there - yeukh!!
I wonder if the aunties that hug and kiss felt the same way before they became aunties. smile Maybe I will be doing the hugging and kissing to other youngsters when I am older. I dont think I will, but you nevvveeerrrr know. smile
Learn to love yourself, then learn to love one-another
H.Roshan, what are you on about? This has got nothing to do with sexual orientation.
I prefer not to dole out buckets of affection to smelly strangers just because I find myself stuck in a frantic hugging session. I wonder if this is indigenous to our culture? And perhaps that the original motive - that the sense of touch is healing - has gotten lost amidst the mire of social etiquette?
i think 'air kisses' are ok but the sinkplungers that land on the cheeks! yup ide run a mile, oh its even worse for me when i look embarrased ppl shakemy hand instead (kind of a relief)
My best memory of my grand mother - she passed away last month - was whenever I met her, she would give me a great tight hug and kiss me all over my face. It would be sometimes so amusing. She was always on a wheelchair as she couldn't get up and I would bend down, so she can place her hand on my head. But she will always grab me from my shoulders and bring me closer, sometimes knocking me off-balance. I loved my grand mother.
Other aunties etc... No kissing or hugging there now. The men in our family just give a good hug and a firm handshake :)
Amongst friends ... oh yeah. In true Pakistani culture we friends give a tight bear hug to each other and each of us will be trying to either break or atleast severaly damage the other's ribcage. The least you can do is to lift the other person in the air.