Read this extract from Bano Qudsia’s novel ‘Raja Gidh’.
Summary is that people from different classes consider others be-hayaa / be-sharam… The Hijabi ladies consider be-hijab ladies with long hair (choti not in fashion now) be-hayaa. Long hair ladies consider those be-hayaa who get their hair cut and use maskara, etc… Those who wera dupatta consider those not wearing dupatta.
Same is with the men. a TaRoo who is content with just ghooring ladies consider those be-hayaa who are lady killers and enjoy company of ladies.
What is this all about? Are people in our society judgmental or Jelaous of each other?
Is be-hayaai an absolute terms, which is common for society as a whole based on some religious or cultural codes? If yes, then why this categorisation?
is the concept of be-hayai changes with the the time. Any examples of yesteryears ‘behayai’ getting acceptance in today’s times?
what promotes this holier than thou attitude? Are religious / cultural codes not clear enough to tackle this categorisation of hayaa-daar and be-hayaa?
In religion, we all think that we are a normal person and everything we do is normal, above normal is being fanatic, and below that norm is a definite sin.
jab Hayaa kaa masalah aataa hai to sabhii baftareen muttaqii aur parhezgaar ban jaate haiN…taqwa is an individual thing…the bottomline is same for ALL in a religion…the problem is if we progress in taqwa to a higher level, that baseline/bottom-line is also raised one notch up and, as a result, we start considering others as ‘bhaTke huye/gumraah’ log!
In religion, we all think that we are a normal person and everything we do is normal, above normal is being fanatic, and below that norm is a definite sin.
have you observed some actions / traditions, etc which were cultural taboos and considered be-hayai 2-3 decades ago in our society and now they are normally accepted things. I mean there is no tag of be-hayai on those acts.
Main ne observe kiya jo larkiyan zyada mod squad hoti hain unko prefer kiya jata hai as compared to those who are simply dressed.
especially institutes wagera mein. beshak woh mediocre student he kyun na hon
I think she means dressing according to fashion indicates the level of education in institutes now a days.People have formed a different picture in their minds as to what an educated girl/boy should look like based on which a competition has started between the institutes.For example no one can imagine a girl in abaya going to LUMS or NCA type institues and if she is people will say Oh ye lums me parhti hy lgti to nahi.
Yeah exactly em talking about educational institutes, and especially their admin who are enough to inculcate poison among female students.
they need to strongly object but unfortunately they promote them and prefer them with more gentle tone . these are socially acceptable?
and secondly the girls who use to wear jeans,top,often try to be dominating and watch other like extra roab jamaana
Few days ago i went to watch movie in arena with all female cousins, we all were new to that zone ,so were not totally aware about the rules and policies,we tried to talk with an extra mod squad girl for some help who was in tight jeans and holding ipad, but she was like in the mood to say GO to HELL. she was deviating from the cultural terms on the basis of her physical appearance na then why she was showing attitude? she was proud of her indecent dressing and bogus styles. ? concept of be hayaai ends up there when we know that we are following wrong dress codes but still adopt bold dress styles.
Can't we not judge people for what they wear or don't wear. Doesn't matter if she has an abaya on or hot pants, as long as she doesn't act like a biatch she's cool. If someone is an ass, doesn't really matter what he/she wears.
^ If you dress like a thug, it either means you are one or that you want someone to think you are.... Clothing may or may not reflect your character, but modest clothing does create comfortable environment for everyone...
^Dont agree to what saeedin said. Its not about judging anyone, its about our culture n norms. And decent people (boy n gals both) wear decent dresses.
But is the decent defined in a particular culture? your decent may be different from my decent.
