backbiting mil and sil

[system]

Re: backbiting mil and sil

Devoted.

I can completely understand where you coming from. Problem wise.

My ILS never intervened between me and him, and he won't let anything bad be said about me either. Thats the way it shuld be as well.

What iwill say is its one thing having a problem, when you talk abut it on the boards there are a twillion people who will think that your not that innocent and you may have contributed to it in someway.

Hang in there, and pray namaz.

[system]

Re: backbiting mil and sil

And yeah...patience goes a loooooooooong way. You will be rewarded. Life is unfair, but it can't be that unfair.

[COCO]

Re: backbiting mil and sil

@Sara516

Any guy who won’t ever stand up for his wife is a wussy.. seriously..

:CareBear: very well said..

[musk]

Re: backbiting mil and sil

get a job ladies, and i mean it...you will be too busy to worry about anything..and a SIL who asks her bhabhi about such matters as intercourse is not only rude but way out of line...bhabhi jee find something that you enjoy and devote your time on that hobby to get away from all this bull ****, or better yet get a job ....i know i know its not easy as that in pakistan....well than move away...oh i think you already live abroad no...oh well either way keep your self busy with things that make you happy and not just wait for rewards from Allah.

[Devoted2Allah]

Re: backbiting mil and sil

@musk

get a job ladies, and i mean it...you will be too busy to worry about anything..and a SIL who asks her bhabhi about such matters as intercourse is not only rude but way out of line...bhabhi jee find something that you enjoy and devote your time on that hobby to get away from all this bull ****, or better yet get a job ....i know i know its not easy as that in pakistan....well than move away...oh i think you already live abroad no...oh well either way keep your self busy with things that make you happy and not just wait for rewards from Allah.

im in the uk and just had a baby, busy with him but once your head is mashed its hard to get the things out.

[Sara516]

Re: backbiting mil and sil

@Devoted2Allah

look people i know bahu’s can be nasty too and most dont stay quiet but believe me i know myself and i would never do that kind of typical stuff to behonset i just dont have the guts,

i am positive i am not responsible, there are two sides and this is my side, my in laws have a habit of picking up on petty issues. i know myself and i know that i always try my hardest to be nice to peopole, i dont like hurting peoples feelings, my intention from the start of my marriage was not be a typical bahu that you hear about, even when they say things to my face i keep quiet, my **mil called my family batameez becoz we didnt serve them dinner the first time they came to our house **, but i didnt say anything, my mother passed away when i was younger and my father didnt marry and my mil said that hes not capable of taking care of a woman and no one owuld want to marry him anyway…i stayed quiet …my sil asked me how many times i have intercourse with my husband, she said i want to compare and tell my husband which i thought was rude but not once have i mentioned this to my husband, she listens in to my fone conversations but neither have i mentioned that. there are lots of other things but whats the use, i dont tell myhusband coz i know it will cause conflict between us so i just stay quiet knowing that Allah will reward me.

I’m sorry i dont wanna be mean but how in the hell can you justify staying quiet when ur own father is being degraded and insulted??? Family is important, but no way in hell would I ever let some ugly b*tch of an aunty talk crap about my mother or father. How dare they !!!

And what freakin business is it of hte sister asking about her BROTHERS SEX LIFE!!! THATS SICK AND DISGUSTING!!! :yukh:

:no:

[Sajalina]

Re: backbiting mil and sil

devoted
I am soooo sorry you have to go thru all this.
It must be very, very tough for you. I really hope things get
better for you.

Try to spend as much time with your baby as you can
which I am sure u already do. But try to enjoy each and every moment
with the baby. This should help you a bit. Again may ALLAH help you.

[adyan]

Re: backbiting mil and sil

try to ignore it .. i know its easy to say but thats the best way.. and try to offer every namaz .. ALLAH (T) is with u

[Devoted2Allah]

Re: backbiting mil and sil

do people think i should speak to him about his sister asking me such a rude thing? iw ant him to know what she asked and what she is like?

[Barfee]

Re: backbiting mil and sil

Why not be up front with your mil and sil? Nicely though.

[Sara516]

Re: backbiting mil and sil

YES!! Though if ur hubby wudnt even react to his sister asking about his sex life, that's pretty sad and i feel sorry for you :(

[musk]

Re: backbiting mil and sil

no its no use talking to hubby, hubbies ko problem dai kar kuch bhi nahi milta...since they are so biased.
and yes its hard to get unpleasant things out of your head, but one must do it for their sanity and health, being in that state of mind will help no one specially you and your new born son...if you cant do it for your self do it for your son.. and beleive it or not he is the reward from the god that you have been waiting for, so chin up and keep smiling.
Sara right on...no one has the right to talk about your parents in that manner, next time they complain to you about your father just shut them off completely by saying "excusme, i dont have any control over my father he is a grown man and sorry i cant teach him at his age how to behave with my stupid and conniving inlaws...however if you want to learn few manners i can teach you plenty". hehehe

[Meem]

Re: backbiting mil and sil

Maybe you could let him know casually. Rather than telling him in the form of a complaint, you could tell him nicely in a joking way: This is what your sister asked me, can you believe it? Hahaha. That way he won't feel like you are attacking his family and at the same time he will be informed.